TMI Tuesday: No More Highchair!

For well over a year our son has been using a highchair at home and at restaurants for all of his meals and snacks. Wheeling the cumbersome contraption had become part of our daily routine at home but one thing that we had been noticing whenever we would go out to eat lately was that our son really enjoyed being at the table rather than eating off a tray. We put off looking for a home alternative for some time but it finally got to the point that it was time to switch him over to a booster seat.

So, with a few ideas in mind as to what we were looking for, all three of us headed over to the local Walmart and made the trek to the back of the store where all the baby and toddler equipment lined the shelves. Once my wife and I found a few options we turned to our son, who was not annoyed and fascinated at the process, and let him pick out his new chair. Surprisingly, he was pretty concise in his selection process almost immediately pointing to the one he wanted and watch me as I put it in the cart behind him.

Within the week, we had switched him over at home, without the tray of course, so now he sits at the table with mommy and daddy proudly feeding himself as he enjoys the additional freedom that his new chair has to offer. And, of course, since then we have picked up place mats and other toddler accouterments which he seems to be enjoying as well. However, we still ask for a highchair whenever we go out to dinner as the boosters are a little too precarious for our squirming toddler and we don’t want to have to pick him up off the floor along with his crayons.

He doesn’t seem to be bothered by the different seating arrangements as he is simply enjoying being at the table. For me and my wife, it is just amazing how quickly time is going by and how many changes keep happening. He is becoming a little more independent with each change that we make with this being only the most recent. But, the most important thing is that he remains a happy and energetic toddler that enjoys reading and playing with mommy and daddy. So, for now it is time to wave bye bye to the highchair as we take it upstairs and put it into our storage area.   

TMI Tuesday: Get In The Car Daddy!

When my wife and I were planning out our summer last year we weren’t quite sure how our son would react to being in the car for long stretches of time. As it turned out, he enjoyed the time exploring and seeing new places… at least to a certain extent. Of course, last summer he spent most of his time sleeping as the mile markers slipped by the window and sometimes my wife would join him in slumber. Things are quite different now and it is hard to tell how long he would be able to stay in the car before he has enough.

This doesn’t mean that he doesn’t enjoy traveling or being in the car. On the contrary in fact. This weekend was a perfect example of this as there were many instances when we were outside and every now and again, usually whenever he caught a glimpse of my car in the driveway, he would point, babble something, and start leaning toward the car. We quickly discovered that what he was saying was “Get in the car daddy! I want to go for a drive!” So, shortly after, we would pack everything up, climb in the car, and get on the road… fortunately we had some idea as to where we were headed. At least this time around.

Almost as soon as the car would start moving, this restlessness ceased. Unlike the previous year, he was wide awake the entire time we spent driving around the area. Between looking out the window, playing with his small toys, and giving me a wide smile when I would reach back and tussle his hair, he was a happy little toddler enjoying the time on the road with mommy and daddy. And this change has got us thinking about our plans for this year… our, as of now, undecided plans.

It is amazing, but not surprising, to think about all the different things that our son enjoys and the fact that most of them are quite simple. He is not into a lot of the fancy toys or overstimulating shows, he enjoys the simpler things. He likes his wooden and overall non mechanical toys probably more than any others. He enjoys Mickey Mouse and Sunday Morning on the television. However, what he seems to enjoy most is exploring and seeing the world from behind the car window as well as experiencing new places. It makes me glad that we decided to be cautious by replacing my car and, at this point, I guess we better get moving on booking a few places to stay over the summer and schedule a few other day trips.

Different But Similar

There have been several occasions when I have heard people compare the first meeting with a candidate with that of a sales meeting. I wholeheartedly disagree with this premise. Meeting with those men interested in becoming masons should never involve any kind of sale whatsoever and should never come across as such. Meeting with a candidate for the first time should be a time to answer questions and start and interesting conversation. At no point during such conversations have I had the goal of getting a petition signed… my objective has always been to have a great conversation.

By approaching the process in this way it allows all the cards to be put on the table. The potential candidate gets to know me and I get to know them. We find our similarities and, sometimes, we discuss our differences. While I do my best to answer any questions they may have about freemasonry and give a very broad overview of the lodge, the fraternity, and the process of becoming a mason, it is a very open and broad conversation as a whole. Right or wrong, this is how I approach these opportunities to meet interesting people from the community.

This was the case last night as I had previously coordinated a time to meet with a prospective candidate last week. After a brief introduction and welcome, we made our way into the hall and sat at one of the dining tables to simply have a conversation and to get to know one another. Over the course of the evening there were a number of other brothers who introduced themselves and joined the conversation and by the end of the night we had discussed a wide range of topics. However, the most important part of the evening was that we were able to learn a little about him and he was able to learn a little about us as individuals, the lodge, and freemasonry in general.

As we talked about our families and the reasons why freemasonry piqued our interest there were a number of commonalities in our perspectives and in our lives that wouldn’t necessarily be evident to someone who would simply see the two of us talking. The reasons for our interest in the fraternity are nearly identical and we are both interested to learn about our grandfather’s lives within freemasonry. However, he did surprise me by the end of the night by immediately completing a petition on the spot. This surprised me both because I didn’t expect him to do so (I never go beyond handing someone a petition and asking them to think about it) and because it is the same way that I would have reacted had I been given the same situation.

Again, I walked toward the parking lot reinvigorated by the night and excited to have another good man interested in joining our lodge and becoming part of this fantastic fraternity. I consider myself very lucky for having witnessed that same passion and excitement so many times in so many good men over the years (especially over the last several months). There is a lot to be thankful for and a lot to look forward to during the second half of the year.

Saying Goodbye To The Jeep

March 2016: Jeep at the scene of the accident. 

Once I heard back from the repair shop following my first accident this past March stating that the Jeep was going to be repaired my wife and I had an important decision to make. With the frame having been bent in the accident (and now having to be bent back) were we comfortable driving and riding in the car? More importantly, did we trust the car enough to have our son in it? In the end, it wasn’t the same car and we no longer had the confidence in the vehicle to continue using it as my daily driver (especially on those days when I have my son in the back).

While we knew that it would be a costly decision, we decided to start looking for a replacement vehicle (a process that I have written about before). The Jeep was a great car so that is exactly where I started my search. I went online and priced out the 2016 version of the exact make and model of my car. Once I input that information I added the features that I wanted in the new car to see where the price would fall. Seeing a replacement price within inches of $40,000 I quickly questioned whether I would be buying another Jeep. So, given the new price point, I searched for a few other options.

June 2015: The day I bought the Jeep. 

With a full roster of cars on my list (a compilation I never thought I would pull together in my lifetime) we dedicated a weekend to hopping from dealer to dealer looking at all the options that I had uncovered and determining whether or not there was any wiggle room beyond the USAA price. A few cars were eliminated because of the lack of fit and finish while others were great cars but simply not the right one for me. In the end, I had to decide between the Jeep Cherokee Trailhawk and the car that I picked up today the Mercedes Benz GLC 300 4Matic.

May 2016: The Mercedes replaces the Jeep.

Once everything was factored in including price of the car, the options that I wanted, the interest rate on a loan, the cost of insurance, fuel economy, and other numerous factors the Mercedes just made much more sense. Believe me, I was shocked by this revelation too. While there are certain trade offs between the two (i.e. off road capabilities vs. highway comfort), I am completely happy with the decision that we made. On top of all this, in a bit of creative financing, we actually traded in my wife’s car and leased a GLA 250 4Matic with all the options that she wanted on the car. In the end, we both ended up in new cars and, considering all financial commitments before and after, pretty much broke even financially.

All that is left now, besides enjoying our new vehicles, is to complete the insurance claims which should, to put it nicely, be the most ‘interesting’ part of the whole process. We also still have to come to terms with the simple fact that we are both driving Mercedes which, at the very least, is one of the more surreal feelings that we have encountered in a long time. Just add one more thing to the list of changes over the past couple of years.

Looking Back On Independence Day

There is one day more than any other throughout the year that I miss being in Israel and sharing in the joy that the people of the country has to offer… Yom Ha'atzmaut. Every year I can’t help but think about all the people that we met and others that we got to know through the internet during our Aliyah experiment. Many of those people I am still in contact with to this day, nearly five years after the fact, and I enjoy seeing the lives that they have built for themselves in our homeland.

The images of that time remain vivid in my mind. While it seems but an instant in our lives, the moments are more ingrained in my being that many other that have happened before or since. I can recall the uneven stones along the sidewalk as we walked to old city. The warmth radiating from under our feet as the sun disappeared beyond the ancient hills.

I recall many of the moments of getting lost in the alleys and streets both in the daylight and well past the setting of the sun with only the faintest of sounds echoing between the buildings. However, most enduring are the moments when we were welcomed into the homes of others and into the community around us. While we didn’t fully process the companionship that was shared with us during those moments and meals, it is something that remains with me to this day. Only in Israel can you be welcomed in such a way.

Of course, what has become more poignant now is the memory of my wife and me sitting on a bench along King George Street discussion our return to the states. It was at this moment when we finally realized that we were ready to start a family. More accurately, with all the changes that were happening and things that were beyond our control, we realized that there was never going to be the perfect time and decided that it was time. In the end we were a little delayed but that was the moment when we made the decision to start a family.

However, and most will agree with this sentiment, there are two moments that supersede all others when I think of Israel. Both of these experiences were actually on our first trip to Israel during our honeymoon nearly seven years ago. They happened in relatively quick succession the first occurring when we turned the corner walking along the wall around old city (the Ramparts Walk) and saw the Kotel for the first time. We continued toward the wall wide eyes and when I laid my hand and head against the cool stone, the world disappeared around me. I will never forget that feeling.

So, on this Independence Day I celebrate the people, the land, the history, and the faith that makes Israel not just the Holy Land but our Homeland. And when we return it will be as a family and I hope to find that same bench where we had the discussion that would eventually result in our having a son. And, most importantly, I look forward to experiencing Jerusalem and Israel as a whole as a father and I can’t wait to introduce our son to his homeland. Am Yisrael Chai!

It Is Part Of Our Past, Present, And Future

Today was one of those holidays that I wish was unnecessary… it is a day that a hundred years ago was thought, for the most part, to be an unthinkable means by which to mark a calendar. Today, on Yom HaShoah, I thought about all those whom I’ve met, those I have yet to meet, and those I will never be able to speak to. Today we honored all of their memories and hope for a future where these events become impossibilities. Today we took the time to think and pray about the Holocaust, the people lost, the lives changed, the families that will never be the same, and our faith which survived.

While I am quite removed from the tragedy being that I was raised in another faith and a family history that, most recently, immigrated to the United States in the middle of the 19^th century, I am also closely tied to this time in history. At various points in my life, the Holocaust has played a prominent role in my perception of the world around me, the views that I have developed, and the faith that I have nurtured. The Holocaust, in many ways, is ingrained in who I am and the way I live my life. And it was further made an essential part of my being when my wife and I made Aliyah in 2011.

It all started when I was in college as I was trying to figure out who I was and what I believed (for the umpteenth time). When browsing through the book stacks I came across Janusz Korczak’s account of the Holocaust, Ghetto Diary. I was struck by the dedication he had to not only his children by to his faith. His words were the impetus for the Holocaust poetry I would spend the next several years writing (based on three different sources of primary material). His words changed my view of the world, focused my mind, and ignited my passion. These writings also afforded me the opportunity to speak with Holocaust survivors and former Nazi soldiers over the years… words can never compare to the knowledge gained by looking into the eyes of a witness.

A few years and many lessons later I was in the midst of my conversion to Judaism when my Rabbi (and later those Rabbi’s serving on my bet din) asked me if I was certain about my decision given the history of persecution that Jews have faced for centuries. It was at this time when I had to search in myself to find out whether I was willing to accept my fate should such an unspeakable event ever happen again. In the end, it is one thing to be knowledgeable about an event or a faith but it is a completely different matter when you accept that history and that possibility as your own. After numerous conversations and questions, I cast my lot and, from that moment forward, have been considered a Jew.

Finally, a few years ago while conducting genealogical research, my wife discovered her family’s connection to the Holocaust and found the names of those relatives who were murdered. Having no previous knowledge about this line, it was quite the shock when this discovery was made. While it was not my family line, it is a heritage to which I am now a part of and one that our son will definitely learn about as he gets older. We will ensure that he knows about our faith, our history, and our people… the trials in the past and the struggles in the present… the horrors that have happened and the hope that resides in our hearts. After all, it is our responsibility, beyond the confines of this particular day, to ensure that this part of our history is never forgotten.

Taxes… Late Again!

Well, it is that time of year again and as has unfortunately become an annual tradition we have filed an extension on our taxes. I was really hoping to get them done on time this year and had even lined up a new accountant but, with everything that has transpired over the last few months, it just wasn’t going to happen before the deadline. While I have much of the material and receipts set aside for this endeavor, I still need to print out a swath of statements and organize the mountain into the different deduction categories. It is definitely an undertaking that I am still not looking forward to.

The real issue that I am finding now is in the upcoming schedule that doesn’t seem to have too many free moments available to get the work done. Well, at least the next couple of months as the summer should provide enough time to pull everything together. This is a real issue, on the one hand I don’t want to spend the hours preparing the paperwork while on the other I really don’t want to give the government more money than I have to give them. After all, we are the ones that had to work for the money.

However, this rather large dilemma is actually proving to be a good thing as it is forcing me to take the tax proposals on the table by the various presidential candidates into more serious consideration. Essentially, this eliminates those whom I have already seen as a detriment namely both Democrat candidates. Basically, I have to look at what kind of financial position I will find myself in should Trump, Cruz, or Kasich take office. Well, at least what is being proposed… I won’t fully believe any of the ‘plans’ until they are implemented. And, let’s be honest, Kasich is done so I am going to focus on Trump and Cruz.

Simply put, you can go with an overhauled 10% flat tax as proposed by Cruz or a simplified graduated tax rate starting with those earning more than $25,000 ($50,000 for married couple filing jointly). For one, a flat tax is something that is manageable across the board and eliminates much of the overhead associated with the tax system (i.e. it would cut government spending) while a revised system would reduce the tax revenue while doing nothing to reduce the burden of associated overhead. Contrary to what many would want you to believe, the flat tax is sustainable and a sensible approach. Plus, I really don’t have a lot of confidence in someone proposing a tax structure when they themselves have spent years paying as little as possible while declaring bankruptcy many times over.

So, in the end, my support of Senator Cruz has been reaffirmed. It has been a long road getting here (he is the third candidate that I have decided to back) but we are now at the point when he is the one candidate that makes sense to me. Additionally, I like his decision to name a running mate in Carly Fiorina who brings a more moderate voice to the ticket as well as a long track record of executive business experience. Now all we can do is wait and see how the remaining primaries play out and what kind of contest we have during the national convention. It will certainly be interesting.

Mortgage Monday: Interesting Questions

No matter where, when, or at what price you purchase a house you will always have questions about your new home. Some are as simple as where things are located in the house while you still get used to your new surroundings. Other times you are curious as to the best routes and best places to shop around your new location. These are just a natural part of the process no matter who you are, where you live, or how much research you did before you bought your property. For some that remain local or knew the former owners they are quickly answered while for most of us it is just a process that takes time.

However, there are a few other questions that I find floating around in my mind that I have also asked a few people from time to time. They are actually more prevalent than I thought even for those who believe that they have the perfect home. It also proves that there is more to a home than the place or the structure. Here are the questions that most people admit to having had fun with in the past:

• Would you still chose to live in the same place where you currently live? If no, where would you look? Yes. We really enjoy the town, the privacy, and the space. 
• Would you build your house the same way that you bought it? No. There are certain things that we want to change and add. Nothing needs to be changed. All minor things that are easily adjusted. Also, there are some aspects of our home that, at the time of purchase, we didn’t realize we wanted.
• Would you live in the same place and/or buy the same house if you had unlimited funds at the time of purchase? Yes and no. Great value in our home but we might have made some modifications immediately after purchase.
• I guess the same thing applies to those that had their house built… would you build it the same way now that you have lived in it? N/A
• What would you change (what would you have changed at the time) if you had unlimited funds? N/A
• Change or rebuild? N/A

I am sure that many of you were thinking about your own responses as you read through the questions above. And for those with whom I have spoken that consider the place they live to be their home, there is nothing in their responses that have led then to regret their previous decision. The certainty waivers a bit when people consider the place they live to be their house. For me, this has actually been an interesting exercise that has proven our decision to be correct time and again… we found the perfect home for us even with its imperfections.

Still Looking

Lately our weekends have been filled (at least half of each weekend) with our search to find a home. Our weeks have also been packed with numerous searches on various real estate websites trying to find that perfect place. We have also been looking to find properties that have the potential to be exactly what we want (at a lower price point of course). It has been, and continues to be, a long process.

While we have our list of things that we want in a home, we also have a strict budget. One that we determined not just by how much we want to spend but also how much we have been prequalified for by the bank. Fortunately, this part went relatively smoothly as both numbers ended up being about the same with the slightly higher figure coming from the lenders. It is nice to know what we actually have to work with when we look at properties rather than running the possibility of seeing something we like and wondering if we can get approved.

What we have also been running into here and there is the fact that we are getting toward the end of the real estate season so there isn’t as many listings and sometimes when we have expressed an interest in taking a closer look there is already an agreement in place. On the one hand it says a lot about the areas in which we are looking but on the other it is, at the very least, cause for the occasional moments of frustration. We can’t really do anything about it besides look at the others that are available and hope that we find what we are looking for.

However, we have introduced slight adjustments to our criteria which have opened up a number of other options. You never know what you might find that falls just shy of some of the things on our wish list (this is most notably found in the size of the property). On the other hand, one thing that we haven’t adjusted and will not adjust is the commute time for my wife. I guess the same can be said for everyone’s search to find a home… you have flexibility in some areas and you have to hold firm in others.

Overall, this is whole process is both exciting and frightening. We are both looking forward to owning our own place and finding our home but I am terrified of two very simple things. The first being the fact that we would be taking on around $200,000 of debt. Enough said about that one. The other is just part of my nature… if we agree on a deal and purchase a house, is there a better one out there, is there another place about to come on the market that would be a better fit for us. I guess we will have to just wait and see what we find but, for the most part, these are two things that I am eventually just going to have to accept and be happy with what we have. From beginning to end and afterward, it is not going to be easy.

Behind Door Number Four...

A week ago I wrote about the decision my wife and I had to make regarding a new car to replace my 2012 Chevrolet Malibu. It had been a great car since I bought it new three years ago but it had become impractical as of late with the arrival of our son. So, once again, we began looking for a new car with the criteria being an all-wheel drive SUV priced under $25,000 with reasonable insurance rates, leg/head room (front and back), with a few other basics found in most cars these days. Additionally, we were hoping to find something with Bluetooth, remote start, cruise control, a full sized spare tire, roof rack, regular outlet, and side molding. This initial wish list led us to the Chevrolet Equinox, Jeep Compass, and Jeep Patriot.

I was able to drive all the cars a couple of times and spent some time at a couple of dealerships with my wife last weekend. Having driven them all I was leaning slightly more toward the Jeep models but didn’t have a really strong feeling either way. Thankfully, my wife was able to help me narrow down the options and almost immediately eliminated the Equinox upon inspection. She had her reasons and I wasn’t going to argue with them. So that left us with the two Jeep models.

The only real difference between the two is the body style. All the other features match up nearly identically with the only difference that I could see being that the Compass had a rear view camera. Being that this was not one of the features I was focusing on it didn’t really help with my decision. By the end of the long day we were able to sit down and make an initial decision on what was available (ordering was not possible as manufacturers have already switched over to 2016 production). We left the dealer on Saturday having put down a $500 deposit on a Jeep Patriot High Altitude Edition.

Throughout the week I spent some time going back and forth with the dealership, securing financing through USAA, and looking around to make sure I got the best price with the options that I wanted on the car. It never hurts to double check. As the end of the week neared I had finalized everything and was eager to pick up the car and dig through the mountain of paperwork. By Friday morning I was able to drive to work in my new 2015 Jeep Cherokee Trailhawk.

That’s right, over the course of the week I had looked around and compared the pricing of a few models. I also had the dealer check the stock on hand to see what was available. I had previously ruled out the Cherokee (especially the Trailhawk) because of the higher base price but looking at what needed and didn’t need to be added, the difference was much smaller than initially thought. It was actually a very similar situation to when I got the Malibu.

In the end, when we originally put the deposit down, I had to make a few compromises with the Patriot so when I came across the Trailhawk with nearly everything on it that we were looking for (everything else can be purchased/added later at a nominal cost) I had to talk to my wife about the slight increase in price (still staying close to our budget). Once she saw how much more we could get for our money we agreed to make the switch. Driving around today, I know that we made the right decision.

And The Search Begins…

2012 Chevrolet Malibu

As I mentioned in my post yesterday, I had to make a couple of stops on my way to lodge on Tuesday night. Thankfully I was able to get out of the office at the usual time which allowed me a few detours before I was supposed to be in Ardmore that evening. So where did I go? As is evident in the title, I stopped at a couple of car dealers

My wife and I decided last week that it might be time for me to get a new car. I have enjoyed my Chevrolet Malibu over the last three years and haven’t had a single issue with it (beyond potholes) but it just doesn’t work for us now that we are a family of three. While we aren’t really flushed with cash (to say the least) we need something that will serve us better than my current car. Plus it would keep us from putting so many miles on my wife’s Subaru Outback that we got earlier in the year. So, with that in mind, I put together a short list of things that I am looking for in a new vehicle. Here is the basic criteria:

Reasonably priced (preferably under $25,000) – easier than you might think using USAA pricing but still significantly limits the options given the criteria below.  

Reasonable Insurance Rates – I really would like to see my rates stay about the same (lower is obviously preferred).

All Wheel Drive - four wheel drive is also acceptable (my wife is at least laughing at that one).

Automatic – because manual is a ‘pain in the what’ and I haven’t had to drive a manual car in 15+ years.

SUV – Putting a stroller in a trunk is not fun. Add anything else in the trunk and it becomes exponentially more difficult.

Leg/Head Room – This is a basic comfort level. If I can’t fit in the front AND back seats I know it won’t work.

Other Basics – power driver’s seat, windows, doors, air conditioning (still not included in the base models of some cars), radio, etc.

Here are some things that I would like to have but can do without:

Remote Start – I don’t use it much but there are some hot/cold days when it is needed especially when we are taking our son.

Bluetooth – I am usually on the phone when I am in the car.

Cruise Control – most of my driving is on the highway.

Full Size Spare Tire – see posts about potholes.

Side Molding – I have seen the dings on doors in the parking lot on cars that don’t have this.

Regular Outlet – I have used a fair amount. You never know when you need to plug your computer or some other electronics in on the road.

Roof Rack – For the longer road trips that we hope to take our son on in the future.

As you can see, I have put some thought into the list of things I would like to have in a new car. With all of those things in mind I began searching using USAA’s car buying service. The three vehicles that cleared the board and met all of the aforementioned things on my list (including the optional ones) are the Jeep Patriot, Jeep Compass, and Chevrolet Equinox. With those three in mind I mapped my course on Tuesday night stopping at a Jeep dealer first because I had never driven any model Jeep before.

2015 Jeep Patriot

Contrary to some of the reviews I found in some of the industry publications, I really enjoyed the ride, feel, and finish of both models. They are on the smaller side of the SUV market but there is a lot there for the money (fully loaded (more options than I have specified above) limited models are near the top of the budget). They look to be solid options and I was pleasantly surprised at how much I liked them.  

2015 Jeep Compass

From there I drove to a Chevrolet dealer near the lodge. The same dealer from which we bought my wife’s previous car. There I was able to see the Equinox. In addition to being larger than both Jeep models the price tag is also higher (about $4,000 – 5,000 more than a comparably equipped Jeep). However, I have had a great experience with Chevrolet and am familiar with many of the options that are available. Also nice is the fact that GM now offers 2 years of free maintenance on new cars.

2015 Chevrolet Equinox

By the time I got to the lodge I was basically in the same place that I started. I liked all three options that met every single item on my rather extensive wish list. I would be happy with any of them and they would all work well for many years to come. I guess it is probably going to come down to price and how much they are willing to work with me on getting those payments as low as possible. Of course, I am going to have to test drive each of them some more as well. Stay tuned for an as of yet unscheduled update on the decision.

Lodge Or Vote?

Not very Shakespearean but a bit of a dilemma nevertheless. This was the decision that I had to make last night at the end of the work day. As I got in the car I still wasn’t completely sure as to which direction I would travel… fellowship was at 7:30 in Ardmore but the polls closed at 8:00 with my polling place more than 30 minutes away from the lodge. While I was leaning heavily toward heading toward home, you never know when the phone is going to ring and you have to adjust your evening by heading over to the lodge.

 Even though there weren’t any seats of major significance up for grabs in my area, there were still campaigns being run and candidates that shouldn’t be allowed near any public office. This seems to be the pattern every election and yet people never learn and keep voting those individuals into public office. With no urgent calls from the lodge and wanting to get home as soon as possible to spend time with my wife and son, it was not a hard decision to head down the street from the house on a small detour to cast my vote.

While it should be no surprise that I didn’t vote for any of the people to the left of the ballot, there were a number of decisions that had to be made and a variety of issues that differentiated the possible choices from one another. As with many of my political decisions at this point in my life, it really came down to a simple concept… who supports my rights and who believes in individual responsibility? That is the basic foundation to many of my views (also the reason that I previously made known my support for Rand Paul).

And here is where everything comes around and demonstrates the flow of thoughts and ideas from one day to another. As I write this Senator Paul has been on the floor filibustering the renewal of the Patriot Act. One of the few willing to take a stand, stand up for our rights, and defend the constitution. While some will surely say that this is a political stunt to get his name out there to support his campaign I will simply remind those making that assertion that this is something that he has done before.

While there is no doubt that his stance will galvanize his base the more important take away is the fact that there is someone willing to fight for our rights and uphold the Constitution. The Patriot Act is something that I have never been able to fully support especially as it has been leveraged time and again from the day that it was passed to broaden the scope of its reach legitimizing a federal invasion of privacy. It is nice to know that there are still some people willing to fight for our rights which is why I will continue to exercise my right to vote whenever I am given the opportunity.

Firearms Friday: Range Time

I have read and watched countless reviews online on a variety of firearms. Sometimes there have been ones that have piqued my interest while others just seem like the same thing just with a different name. Either way, the internet, especially YouTube, has been a great resource to find new and interesting firearms or simply to find out a little bit more about one that I may already been familiar.

While all reviews generally go over the various features and the aesthetics of the firearm and some even give you an overview of the history of the development or of the company, there are too many that are missing the most important part of the evaluation… performance. Lately I have come across a variety of reviews from multiple sources and in various forms (i.e. print, blogs, and videos) where the reviewer was offering praise to a firearm that they had yet to take to the range. This still seems to be a rare occurrence but what is not are those reviews that offer a final decision based on a nominal amount of rounds down range.

And, honestly, my threshold is very low in comparison to many people at approximately 300 rounds. Usually, by the time you reach this figure all of the “breaking in” factors have been mitigated and the reviewer can have a reasonably good feel for the firearm. This is particularly true with firearms that have unique features, grip angles, operations, enhancements, etc.

This is the primary reason why I have yet to write any reviews myself… I don’t have the time to do performance evaluations. A review without that key component is essentially useless. This also applied to modifications made to a firearm that are supposed to improve performance. Without a good round count there is no way that someone can offer a solid opinion on a firearm/modification and either recommend or not recommend the purchase thereof.

It all comes down to range time. Whether reviewing or practicing, you need to put enough rounds down range so that you are comfortable and familiar with the firearm that you are using. Keep in mind that the 300 round figure above is only for the review side of things… one trip to the range to get a decent impression for review purposes. For those of you who are going to rely on your firearm, 300 is nowhere near the number of rounds you need to become proficient.

Thousands upon thousands of rounds are essential to know your personal firearm and training is another key component to obtaining proficiency. You have to remember that you are not just doing a review or determining a first impression, you might need that firearm to save your life and protect your family. Reviewers have a responsibility to provide fully informed reviews while firearms owners in general have a responsibility to be proficient with their personal firearm.

From One To Many

There is always a time each year when a variety of events seem to converge during a single month at the lodge. Sometimes it can even come down to a single day. It is hard enough when there are a variety of Masonic commitments converging, having family projects that need to be addressed at the same time just adds to the difficulty.

While it would be nice to be able to go to everything and not lose out on the time at home, it isn’t a realistic scenario. Anyone who is or has been an officer knows this routine all too well. And while I have recently significantly cut back on the time I have been spending at the lodge, I am uncertain as to whether I can avoid the pull of my office much longer.

Things have to get done this month and there are certain commitments that I have to make. This is nothing new but the number of things that have to get done before the next meeting, an official visitation, has become overwhelming at times. I can’t even find the time to coordinate the transitioning of tasks to my assistant.

However, when I step back and take a look at the problem it really doesn’t seem that bad. There have been times in life when I had to look for something to do and now I am looking at a variety of options. While it would be nice to be able to pick just one, I still have the options and people who want me to be present at each. It is a really good feeling and on that is too often overlooked.

This is a message that I do my best to relay to the new brothers that come into the lodge… we want you to be here. We are all integral to the success of the lodge and the fraternity as a whole. You never have to look for a place to be or somewhere that you can go… there is always a place for you, sometimes a chair for you, at the lodge. It is a powerful thing to think about especially during this time when the digital barriers as so ever-present. We want you here, as an equal, as our brother.

Even though Michael Keaton warned us of the pitfalls, it looks like I may have no other option than to be present at two or more events… I am pretty sure that the simple one will be showing up to one of them calling everyone Steve. The trick is trying to figure out how to accomplish this seemingly impossible task. It is just nice to know that wherever I find myself I am going to be welcomed and I will be among family.

What’s In A Name?

One of the hardest if not the hardest decision that my wife and I have had to make was when we had to come up with a name for our son. We went back and forth countless times and consulted more books and websites than I can recall each time writing down anything that appealed to us. We couldn't decide between choosing a traditional Jewish name and those names that can be found in our extensive family trees. After we each wrote a few options down we would share with one another. This eliminated many of the options. More still were eliminated when we considered the names of some of our young relatives.

After several months going back and forth we had a few options both of first names and middle names, Jewish names and family names, some that we both really liked and others that had a certain amount of indifference with one or both of us. About a week before our son arrived we sat down and looked at the options that we both liked. We played around with the names switching between first and middle as well as family and non-family names. We also considered some of the surnames on my wife’s side for the middle name… after all it has worked for me.  

I guess there were about 5 first and 5 middle names that it came down to. Not being able to figure out what exactly fit our son we both took turns just saying them out load to see what sounded right. This is when we notice something very special. Each time we read the names our son decided to cast his vote. It didn’t matter whose voice, he consistently kicked, punched, or head butted when we would say each name… one first and one middle. Not many parents can say that their son chose his own name but we can.

His first name is one that runs throughout both sides of my family. When looking throughout the tree I see it across many branches with various surnames in tow: Teaford, Hallman, Uttley, Redcross, Cooke, Clapsaddle, Ardis, Noblit, and a few others. It runs throughout the generations and it has always been a family name. In addition to the recent significance and honor that the name carries it was also the name of my great great grandfather Uttley, a member of the Philadelphia Police Department for over 50 years, who raised my grandmother after her parents divorced. My 5^th great grandfather Redcross, member of the Monacan Nation and Revolutionary War soldier. My great grandfather Hallman who served in WWI. My 5^th great grandfather Noblit, one of the early residents of Middletown Township in Delaware County who saw much of his property seized during the Revolution.

With our son selecting his first name from my side his middle name had to be one of significance in my wife’s family. Thankfully our son agreed and chose a name which, according to what I have been told is the name of the last in a long line of Rabbis on my wife’s side. My wife’s great grandfather Greenburg may have passed nearly a decade before she was born but his legacy still lives to this day. Born in Romania and having come to the United States around the turn of the 20^th century as a child, he supported his family the best he could and raised my wife’s grandmother whom she still misses. In the end, our son chose names from the men who raised both of our grandmothers to which we were very close. He also made picking a Hebrew name really easy. 

So some many see it and wonder how we came up with the name and we have been asked that many times over. We did consider the origins of the names (which did seem to fit our son) but the family meaning behind them is far more significant. While we have both given the short answer during the course of conversations, now you have the full story behind the name. Our son has a part of each of us, myself and my wife, but more importantly he carries with him a long family history on both sides of which he can be proud and all he has to do to remember that is look at his own name.

Coming Home

When we were given the option of leaving on Wednesday or Thursday we did take a few moments to think about it. However, being confined to our hospital room since we arrived, it really wasn’t a hard decision to make even with the linger fears of heading out on our own. So once the doctor came in for our morning visit, we let her know that we were ready to go and that we would be out and on the road by midafternoon.

The first part of the prep was making sure that the car seat was secured in the back of the car. I vaguely recall having done this in the past when my niece still used one (she’s 20 now) but that little piece of knowledge has long since shaken out of my head. It’s not a difficult process by any means but when you are trying to make sure that your child is safe every parent, no matter how laid back, gets incredibly OCD about these kinds of things.

We got the room backed up, secured our surprisingly quiet son in his car seat, and called for an escort to help us get down to the lobby and out front to our car which I had pulled up earlier. It was a surreal feeling knowing that we came to the hospital just a few days ago still as a married couple and now we were leaving as a family of three. We were about to enter the real world covered in a fresh coating of snow and a bitterly cold wind barreling down the street.

With all three of us secured in our seats and the pile of stuff crammed in the trunk, I slowly pulled around to the stop sign and started our drive home. I can’t recall any other point in my life being so careful and deliberate behind the wheel… not even during my driving test. Needless to say, with a new baby and my wife still recovering from major surgery, it took a little longer than expected to get to the house but we made it there safe and sound.

Walk in the door we knew things were completely different and that coming home meant so much more now than it did in the past. We were home and ready to start living our life as a family. However, starting off, just like with the car, I am sure that we are going to have plenty of OCD and overprotective moments. Such is the beginning of parenthood.

Family First

I spent much of the week finding the little time that I could to tie up some final things for the stated meeting last night. On my way to the lodge the plans for the evening began to slowly change. About halfway to Ardmore I got on the phone with my wife who wasn’t feeling particularly well earlier in the day. As it turned out, my last stated meeting of the year was actually last month.

When my wife called I was honestly a little frustrated as I had been looking forward to this particular meeting all year. It has taken a lot of work to get to this point and I really wanted to be there for some of the announcements that we had planned for the evening and to welcome the brothers who will be taking office for the next year. By the time I pulled into the parking lot I knew that was no longer a possibility.

I rushed through the front door trying to think about all the details that needed to be passed along before I could head back out. The brethren could see the stress and worry on my face as I ran up and down the stairs and from room to room doing my best to keep things organized. With less than 30 minutes until the meetings was to begin, I was finally able to pull my assistant aside and fill him in on the situation. I felt bad for the short notice but there wasn’t really anything that I could do about it.

It was a lose-lose situation where I felt bad for the time that it took to get out the door and to my wife but I also felt bad for having to miss my first meeting since June 2013 and my first as an officer. I was torn for a few minutes but, in the end, family comes first. Not surprisingly, I heard those words repeated many times over as I hustled to get moving.

As the meeting was starting I was unlocking the apartment door and immediately checked to see how my wife was feeling. We talked to the doctor, made sure that we did everything we could to care for her and our 28 week old son, and waited for things to improve. A long night later and my wife was feeling much better. And while I wasn’t able to be at the lodge meeting, I did hear about the reactions from the brethren regarding the announcements and found out that everything else went smoothly.

Dialing Decisions

It is that time again… my iPhone is beginning to slow and the battery life is not what it used to be. Normally I would simply go to AT&T and get whatever the $0.99 upgrade is at the time but due to some of the changes to their policies that doesn’t seem like the most viable option. So, with that said, I am expanding my search for a replacement.

The iPhone has served me well over the past few years. Both the 3 and the 4 have held up well and I have year to break one (I don’t know how people do it). The apps, when not a complete waste of time, are actually quite useful and some of them have even been beneficial at times. However, the compatibility issues with my laptop and the limited battery life are getting on my nerves. Additionally, I am getting tired of the idea of having a phone which require proprietary cords, apps, and doodads rather than a simple platform which communicates with my other non-Apple devices.

So, I have taken a few minutes of the day and looked at my phone trying to pinpoint what I really use it for, how I could use it, and how I should use it. By stepping back I realized that all of the things that do nothing but waste my time are things that I can really do without and I don’t care if they are not available on other phones. At the same time, some of the other apps that I use regularly are not just in app form and so a mobile website can easily take their place (i.e. Ancestry, Facebook, Blogger, etc.). Everything else can be found on other smart phones just in a different configuration and/or under a different name.

With that said, I am used to the platform. I know where everything is and I know exactly how it works. Changing things over isn’t really a challenge but it can simply be time consuming getting used to and figuring out a new way. Time is something that I have very little of at the moment. When I think about that though, given the frequency with which I have to stop using my phone just so it can charge, it might not be that much of a time difference if any.

What I would like to be able to accomplish is to have a phone that doesn’t cost $500+ just in case I need to replace it. Something that I can easily sync with my computer and other devices. Much more efficient use of power… I miss the days when I only had to plug in my phone every other day even with constant use. And, maybe something that I can work on just in case my computer craps out… it has happened before and an iPhone is not a pleasant working tool in that regard.

So, that is my dilemma. What phone should I switch to? Should I stay with Apple (a 6 is NOT an option people)? What is on your mobility wish list? Let me know what you think. I will be sure to write about the phone I chose (probably later this week or next).

Office Meetings And Decisions

Every once in a while we have a client come to our office to meet with the team that works on their account. More often than not, we travel to the client’s office but today we welcomed them to our little space for the first time. Needless to say, my day was dominated by the meeting and other internal sessions before his arrival.

While I have worked with many clients that I honestly dreaded whenever they were in the area and would hope that they would either somehow forget where our office was or not have the time to stop by, today was the complete opposite of that scenario. I thoroughly enjoy working for this client and we always have a great conversation whenever we are either on the phone or happen to meet face to face. That simple fact makes it very easy to work hard for the company.

Of course, when such a relationship is in place there are always conversations, brief as they may be, that have nothing to do with the company or work in general. It is those interesting times when we catch up about family, vacations, and even the random discussion that have previously popped up earlier in the day like your top ten movies that everyone should watch (he definitely got some bonus points for thinking of Hot Fuzz and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and putting them on his list). All in good fun and even better since we all share a similarly dry sense of humor.

So, while I usually detest meetings that dominate my day, this one I didn’t mind at all and the meeting moved along rather quickly. In fact, time was moving so fast that I nearly forgot that I had an appointment early in the evening to check and see if the baby is still normal (surprisingly, more so than its parents still). So, while I hauled bottom to make the appointment on time, the rest of them headed north for a nice long night. Those are the best kinds of meetings when everyone is happy/content and the work day is done and I wish I had the time to go but family comes first and I am not going to start missing my child’s events this early in their life.

While I am sure there will be times now and again when I will miss something I will do my best to avoid those instances. I don’t need Harry Chapin rising from the grave saying “I told you so!”. I guess I have already started to change… even if it’s just a little bit… and preparing for the inevitable. With that said, don’t expect everything to change!

Sometimes The Only Cure Is Blindness

When it comes to education or employment I am like most people. I could give less than a crap about what race you are or where you come from. It all comes down to qualifications and ability. Unfortunately, that has not always been the case in this country and there are undoubtedly instances here and there when race and background are seen as differentiators. It is unfortunate but it is also reality.

Racism has always been a problem in this country. I would even call it an epidemic. It is a virulent societal infection for which there is only one cure… blindness.

The latest decision by the Supreme Court in Schuette v. Coalition to Defend Affirmative Action is at least a step, albeit small, in the right direction. Affirmative Action was something that had a place and time. It is by no means a perfect solution but it at least prompted a slight increase in diversity in the educational system and the workforce. And what is the best way to fight racism? That’s right, with more racism. After all, Affirmative Action is inherently racist.

You don’t need to think about it too much to realize that the law was designed so that race is considered in all aspects of higher education and in the workforce. Regardless of the pool of applicants, there are certain quotas that must be met. How would you feel if your child was turned down from a college because the school must maintain a certain level of diversity? How would you feel if you got a job over someone else, someone who may have been more qualified, because of the color of your skin?  

We have gone from one extreme to the other as we try to play political sociologist. While it is without question wrong to discriminate, it should be equally despicable to be racist. And yes, in this scenario, those are two different concepts as it has always been wrong to discriminate based on race and you can’t turn someone down for a job solely based on race when they are otherwise equally or more qualified than the other applicants. However, the requirement to admit students based on certain racial ratios is not discrimination, it is racism. So, as you can see, they are treated as two completely different concepts. This is Affirmative Action in action.

Now, while Affirmative Action is not completely eliminated from the books it is at least in the hands of the people. That is what was done, the Supreme Court is allowing the states to determine whether race can be a consideration in admission to state schools. Specifically, as reported in the Washington Post, “By a vote of 6 to 2, the court concluded that it was not up to judges to overturn the 2006 decision by Michigan voters to bar consideration of race when deciding who gets into the state’s universities.”

In a show of restraint by the Supreme Court Justice Anthony M. Kennedy (joined by Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr and Justice Samuel A. Alito Jr.) wrote the main opinion:

“This case is not about how the debate about racial preferences should be resolved. It is about who may resolve it… There is no authority in the Constitution of the United States or in this court’s precedents for the judiciary to set aside Michigan laws that commit this policy determination to the voters.”

So, in the end, it is up to us. We must demonstrate our blindness, fight for what is right, and also come to terms with the fact that life is not always fair! It is our individual efforts, responsibility, and work ethic that make up who we are. While we all have the opportunity to live life to be proud of in this country happiness is not guaranteed. It is our right to pursue happiness. Our decisions, our efforts, and our ability to see past many of our differences are essential in the achievement of that happiness. As was determined by the justices, it is our decision.