From Boy To Man To Mason

June meetings are always interesting as you never know what the turnout will be like and what motions will be made before the summer break. It is also a time when I have to make sure that everything is up to date so that nothing gets delayed until September. However, the last meeting before the summer break this year was a little bit different and a welcomed change from the previous years. Attendance was average, motions were minimal, and I was able to get everything off of my desk. But that wasn’t the best part of the night.

While we previously held this large gathering a bit earlier in the year, this time around the last meeting before the summer vacation was Scout Night. Not only is it a great opportunity to see the lodge room filled with so many people (masons, parents, and scouts of all ages) but the engagement between many of the people in attendance is great to see. Contract to what many people think, there is a tremendous masonic influence on the foundation of scouting in the United States and bringing all of us together is a tremendous opportunity to share a little bit about each of our respective organizations.

Further, there are a lot of masons (many of which are serving as officers) who were members of the scouts when growing up. Correction, there are many masons who are scouts as it is something that never leaves them. Of those brothers, quite a few have continued their involvement with scouting while adults whether through guiding their own sons or serving as a mentor for a pack or troop. It was particularly interesting to hear a few of those brothers explain what scouting meant to them growing up and how freemasonry has served to continue those principles and comradery that shaped their lives early on.

By the time the evening came to an end, there was a great atmosphere that was magnified by the evening and the conversations which stemmed from the presentations were fascinating to hear. And with a clean slate for the summer, I was eager to join those remaining in the lodge and enjoy the tremendous success that we have all experienced thus far in the first half of the year. While by no means perfect, I hope that the many achievements that we have fostered over the last several months continue to be a part of our new routine rather than simply a small fortunate period of success.

The program served as a great way to enter into the sweltering months and it should carry over into the fall as we look to complete another fantastically smooth year. And with all of the required tasks completed before the weather turns, we are in a great position to initiate some other projects that have been lagging behind for some time now. The lodge may be dark for two months but the light within remains bright and continues to grow brighter with every passing week.

TMI Tuesday: I Can’t Poop!

 

There are many different cries and screams that we have learned to decipher over the past year and a half. Granted, my wife is much better as interpreting them but there are a few that I have been able to pick up over time. One of them has a certain decibel and cadence that simply translates to “I can’t poop and I am not happy about it!” Unfortunately, we tend to know that this one is going to happen when he goes nearly an entire day without a red faced movement.

This is also one of those screams that can really happen at any time, day or night. And it doesn’t matter where we are at the time either as we have experienced his vocal cords piercing our ears while in bed, at the dinner table, in the playroom, while out to dinner, with family, and in the car. It is an equal opportunity scream that definitely gets your attention. Keep in mind that all of this is in despite of him regularly eating a healthy amount of movement inducing foods.

When we hear it we know that he is uncomfortable and, if at night, he is going to have trouble sleeping. And, given the backup that it represents, we try to keep his situation in mind when he doesn’t eat as much or doesn’t scurry around the house at the rate or regularity that he normally does. What’s worse, is that this particular siren becomes more pronounced when he doesn’t get the results he is looking for after the latest colonic pilates session.

During some of these more intense blockages, he even produces what can best be described as golf balls in between complete expulsions. Try sitting on a golf ball or small rock while at your desk and see how that feels. It is a sensation that doesn’t offer any relief. On the contrary, it makes him even grumpier and I can’t really blame him for the reaction.

However, when all is said and done and the increased fiber intake overtakes the barrier, the sense of relief that washes over his face is quite the site to see. Of course, there is a hint of fear in his eyes as well as he knows that the odds of a blowout are rather high in this situation. But, when all is said and done, it is nice to have our cheeky little baby boy back to his normal self. At least until the next time.

Another Season, Another Blood Drive

After a long week I left the house this morning with some trepidation. Our son still hasn’t completely recovered and his schedule has been off lately. And with him still on the mend, I knew that I wouldn’t have my family with me in Ardmore as I had been expecting when I originally organized the event. As I woke up early this morning, I knew that it was going to be a long day but I was also looking forward to reconnecting with a few of the brothers as we all converged upon the lodge for our spring Blood Drive.

Arriving at the lodge a few minutes later than expected (thanks to abnormal Saturday traffic), I didn’t waste any time in coordinating with the Red Cross drivers parked next to the building and immediately opened the doors, turned on the lights, and adjusted the heat. With these minor preparations out of the way, I finally turned around and assessed the space only to find that nothing was ready for the event. So the work continued and even though we had to spend an additional twenty or thirty minutes in setting up the space, everything was ready to go by the time our first appointment arrived at 10:00am.

As usual, the bulk of the appointments were at opposite ends of the day with morning schedules and late afternoon schedules proving to be the most flexible. By the time lunch came around, the steady flow of people had slowed to a trickle and we found ourselves falling well short of our goal for the day. In actuality, while not great our attendance was pretty good but we ran into a number of hiccups along the way as there was an unusually high number of people disqualified from donating (new travel restrictions in particular where not helping).  

The afternoon brought a welcomed flurry of activity both in donations and other brothers joining us for a couple of hours. In the end, while we only received 12 out of a possible 21 donations, it also provided many of us the opportunity to meet brothers whom we had not seen in some time, brothers from other lodges, and also members of the community and from the extended masonic family. It would have been nice to have held a successful blood drive but there was at least some good that came out of the event in the way of fellowship, sure up plans for other events, and gaining greater understanding of what we need to do next time around to far exceed the number of donations that we have received the last two events.

Committees And Headlines

At the beginning of the year the lodge basically conducted an overhaul of the building committee with some help from the District Deputy Grand Master. More than anything else, it was done as a means to both streamline the process and add some additional transparency to the decisions being made and options explored. It is an undertaking to say the least and I am grateful to the brothers that are making this happen and getting things in line for the improvements that need to be made to the building.

This past week was the first meeting of this relaunched committee and given the fact that I haven’t heard anything over the past few days, I am glad that this process is under way. But, this new endeavor brings to light an important lesson for the lodge as a whole. Each and every one of us needs to be involved on some level. Some will be officers, committee members, and mentors while others need to be involved by just showing up. It all begins with the stated and extra meetings of course but we also need brothers to be present at committee meetings such as the one that was just held.

And we also need to take things a step further and simply communicate with one another. The lodge needs to communicate with members and members should talk with one another. Not just about the business at hand but also enjoy the company and fellowship offered to you by your brothers. We are a fraternal family and we should take a vested interest in our fellow brothers, help them, work with them (inside the lodge and professionally), support them always, and, when needed, protect one another.

The recently thwarted attack in Milwaukee is something of which we should all be aware. A radical Muslim man was planning on attacking the Humphrey Scottish Rite Masonic Center believing that he would be doing G-d’s work. And the sad thing is that there are many in this world that believe that they would be doing G-d’s work should they cause harm to freemasonry. While not as extreme as this recent threat, there are many groups, predominantly “Christian”, that wish to see the demise of freemasonry. It is odd to me not just because of the venomous nature of their words and planned actions but because we, as brothers, welcome all faiths with the common bond of a belief in a Supreme Being, a belief in G-d.

But, rest assured, there is more light in a single lodge than darkness in this world spewing hate in our direction. And, for me, I can promise that I will defend my faith, my family, my fraternity, and myself against such evil not with violence but by continuing to make good men better including myself. By supporting one another, the lodge, our fraternity, and the community as a whole we can ensure our success and that the light of freemasonry remains bright in this word. This is how we win. 

Closing Out The Year

The checks are on the way. 

There are always conversations after the stated meeting that get cut short when someone happens to look at their watch. Those discussions are usually followed up on the following week when we all converge on the lodge for fellowship. This week that was definitely the case as there were numerous tasks that needed to be completed and ideas followed up on after the meeting. But, unlike those meeting nights, these weeks in-between are much more relaxed and, because we’re not trying to do 15 things at once, we are usually able to knock out a number of things on our respective lists.

There is still a back and forth among many of the brothers about moving spaces around the lodge, cleaning up and cleaning out certain areas, and other things related to the building usually come up over the course of conversation. This has been a relatively reliable pattern for the first half of the off nights. And while those mini meetings did take place this week, that was not the primary reason for setting aside the time and driving to the lodge last night.

With schedules already hectic and time running short this month, it was time to sit down with both the outgoing Treasurer and Worshipful Master to take care of the final checks for the year. Some were new, some were rewritten for one reason or another, but all of them had to be completed last night. This included the checks that I was looking forward to signing… those to the residents of the Masonic Villages. I tend to take a little extra time in inscribing my name on those checks as they serve, in part, as a means to let our somewhat distant brothers (and widows) know that we are thinking about them and that we are always here to help.

For as much as we have been focusing on the present and the future throughout the past year, we need to remember the past and those who put in the time and sweat to make our lodge what it is today. After all, without their efforts, there is no guarantee that we would still have a lodge to meet in every month. And that is what we need to take away from these meetings and informal fellowship nights… while things may not be perfect, they may not be exactly how we want them to be, they are still here because of the work of all the brothers before us. We are only the most recent in a long line of men who strived to make themselves and others better. And that is what we should strive to do every day as well.

Final Preparations

We are now in the final couple of days, hours really, before the final stated meeting of the year and, as always, there are a few things that I am scrambling to get done before tomorrow night. Mostly this consists of printing out a fresh pile of paperwork, doing some final revisions to the minutes, and making sure all the bills are organized and included in my monthly spreadsheet. It isn’t a time of trying to figure out what to do but rather a period of setting aside the time to do the things that need to be done every month.

Of course, there are always one or two new items every month and the preparations for this meeting are certainly no exception. With elections and installations taking place tomorrow night, I have to make sure that I have all of the corresponding paperwork and lists readily available. There are also a few extra meetings that I have to have on the side throughout the night that require some additional time and planning. And, finally, I need to make sure that the annual donation totals are ready to be calculated and the attendance numbers updated.

However, what might be the most important thing that I have to do personally is to prepare for another year in office. While I took my oath two years ago expecting to stay on as Secretary for a number of years, there never really is certainty when holding elected office. It has been a learning experience to say the least and while I have been far from perfect (really really far), so far the brethren have been supportive of the work that I have done at the lodge and knowing that I have their support is really what keeps me going.

I am also getting ready to hit the reset button after this meeting. Not because I want to forget anything or ignore what has happened but as a means to move forward without either thinking about any past issues of relying on the successes of the previous year. It is a new year with a new slate of officers. While many things remain the same, the masonic years must remain independent from one another for just that reason. What happened in the past, good and/or bad, should remain there. What we learned from those experiences, what to do and what not to do, are the only things that should impact the present and be part of the future.

House Hunting Update

Since my wife and I first started looking at houses (both online and in person) we have seen all different kinds of properties. Actually, maybe not all different kinds but a diverse range of quality, various prices (all within our pre-qualified range), and built at different times. It has been an experience and an education throughout. While there are a few things that now have on our checklist when walking through a property, I will say that this process has been a heck of a lot easier having a great realtor working for us (who just so happens to also be a brother).   

I guess the first thing that has been driven home again and again for us is that price doesn’t mean quality. Some of the houses that we walked through which were at the top of our range had some great features but there were a number of things that left a lot to be desired. At the same time, those houses well below our max budget may not have had some of the fantastic features but they were generally solid all around. So far all a higher price has meant is that the highlights will be there but they will also accentuate the shortfalls.

In many of those instances with the higher priced homes the biggest issue was found in the basement. This is why you must always look in the basement and study the walls of the foundation and the structure surrounding you in all six directions. There were a few houses that we considered putting offers in after having walked through the house but that thought quickly evaporated once we saw the large cracks and chunks missing from the foundation walls (and these houses were only 10-15 years old).

It just goes to show that you have to always look beyond the façade. Not considering the basic structure and foundation of the house but also looking past unfortunate paint selections and minor things that can be fixed within a couple hours over the weekend. While the former will prevent you from making the mistake of buying, the latter may prevent you from making the mistake of walking away.

However, the most important thing that we are constantly reminding ourselves during this long process is that just because it is a nice property doesn’t mean it is the right house for us. We have seen many properties both physically and virtually that would be great fits for people we know but they would never be something that we could call home. It is a long process that requires patience and persistence. And, in the end, I keep saying to myself that right now these are just houses. When we find the right one and move in then it will be a home.

TMI Tuesday: Still Recovering

Recovering from vacation could be worse!

It has been just over a week and we are all still recovering from our summer excursion. While our feet have recovered and our schedules seem to be back to near normal there are still times of adjustment throughout the day. Also, having now been able to think about the trip and trying to get back to our routine, for the record, our son’s maximum vacation length is eight days.

Since our return there have been times when we don’t want to do anything or go anywhere and there are other moments when we look for things to do and places to go. The same can be said for all three of us as, every once in a while, I catch those looks on my son’s face when I know he wants to be out seeing something new. Of course, he still has the occasional moment of “where the heck am I” and “where are we going today?”

There are a lot of things that are back to normal but there are the hiccups that come with change. There are moments when our son is a little more temperamental with his eating or stubbornly not wanting to go to bed. And, with how much he grew during our week away, there are other things that need to be adjusted as well. However, all in all, he has been great getting back into many of the usual routines that he enjoys. It is definitely easier on my wife not having to carry so much stuff around and find new places to feed and change him.

It has certainly been an adjustment from seeing new things every day, being with each other all day, and not having to go to work in the morning but we are working through the change back to normal. Thankfully, in addition to being able to get caught up at work, much of the house work has been done that we put off until we got back. It is looking pretty good actually. Coming home to some of the messing things after being in clean hotel rooms was a bit of an eye opener… we are working on a better daily/weekly routine to make sure that doesn’t happen again!

While this summer has gone about as smoothly as we could have ever hoped, I know that there are few things that we have learned along the way and that next summer will be structured quite differently. It has been good to get away and spend time with family but the length and frequency of the trips will have to be adjusted moving forward. This most recent trip was a tad too long while the other ones could have been extended by a couple of days. All lessons that we will apply moving forward.

Reflections On Father’s Day

My dad with my grandfather (my mom's dad) from before I was born.

Today I was once again out of the apartment. Usually I don’t like to be out and about two days in a row but there was a darn good reason to get back on the road. This time it was a short trip to my parent’s house about 15 minutes down the road so that I could spend time with the best man I have ever known, my father.  

Father’s Day is commonly seen as a compliment to Mother’s Day and the history of the day expounds upon that progression. A good summary, as is commonly the case, can befound on Wikipedia which outlines the history of Father’s Day in the following way:

Father's Day was inaugurated in the United States in the early 20th century to complement Mother's Day in celebrating fatherhood and male parenting.

After the success obtained by Anna Jarvis with the promotion of Mother's Day in the US, some individuals, such as Sonora Dodd, wanted to create similar holidays for other family members, and Father's Day was the choice most likely to succeed. There were other persons in the US who independently thought of "Father's Day", but the credit for the modern holiday is often given to Sonora Dodd of Central Methodist Episcopal Church, who was the driving force behind its establishment.

Father's Day was founded in Spokane, Washington at the YMCA in 1910 by Sonora Smart Dodd, who was born in Arkansas. Its first celebration was in the Spokane YMCA on June 19, 1910. Her father, the Civil War veteran William Jackson Smart, was a single parent who raised his six children there. After hearing a sermon about Jarvis' Mother's Day in 1909 at Central Methodist Episcopal Church, she told her pastor that fathers should have a similar holiday honoring them. Although she initially suggested June 5, her father's birthday, the pastors did not have enough time to prepare their sermons, and the celebration was deferred to the third Sunday of June. Several local clergymen accepted the idea, and on 19 June 1910, the first Father's Day, "sermons honoring fathers were presented throughout the city."

However, in the 1920s, Dodd stopped promoting the celebration because she was studying in the Art Institute of Chicago, and it faded into relative obscurity, even in Spokane. In the 1930s Dodd returned to Spokane and started promoting the celebration again, raising awareness at a national level. She had the help of those trade groups that would benefit most from the holiday, for example the manufacturers of ties, tobacco pipes, and any traditional present to fathers. Since 1938 she had the help of the Father's Day Council, founded by the New York Associated Men's Wear Retailers to consolidate and systematize the commercial promotion. Americans resisted the holiday during a few decades, perceiving it as just an attempt by merchants to replicate the commercial success of Mother's Day, and newspapers frequently featured cynical and sarcastic attacks and jokes. But the trade groups did not give up: they kept promoting it and even incorporated the jokes into their adverts, and they eventually succeeded. By the mid-1980s the Father's Council wrote that "(...) [Father's Day] has become a Second Christmas for all the men's gift-oriented industries."

A bill to accord national recognition of the holiday was introduced in Congress in 1913. In 1916, President Woodrow Wilson went to Spokane to speak in a Father's Day celebration and wanted to make it official, but Congress resisted, fearing that it would become commercialized. US President Calvin Coolidge recommended in 1924 that the day be observed by the nation, but stopped short of issuing a national proclamation. Two earlier attempts to formally recognize the holiday had been defeated by Congress. In 1957, Maine Senator Margaret Chase Smith wrote a proposal accusing Congress of ignoring fathers for 40 years while honoring mothers, thus "[singling] out just one of our two parents". In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson issued the first presidential proclamation honoring fathers, designating the third Sunday in June as Father's Day. Six years later, the day was made a permanent national holiday when President Richard Nixon signed it into law in 1972.

More and more there are moment in my life when I notice that I am beginning to sound or act like my dad (not in the Harry Chapin sort of way) and I couldn’t be happier about that fact. It throws my wife off every once in a while when she notices these things but whenever she points them out I just smile, nod, and think to myself how appreciative I am of that fact. Even the times when my dad and I discuss things we seem to think along the same lines and the discussion progresses quickly… we can summarize the problems of the world rather quickly when we get on a roll.

I wouldn’t trade any of the moments that I have had with my father for anything and I am grateful for all that he has taught me both when instructing me in how to do something, supporting me when things aren’t going well, and the lectures he gave me when I screwed up (I know, your shocked that I’m not a perfect angel). While it may not have been obvious at the time, each of those kinds of moments shaped me into who I am today. Not perfect but much better off for having such a mentor in my life.

While I don’t expect to ever accomplish all that my father has in his life I am trying every day to at least come close. Of course, I doubt that this will ever happen as he still works hard every day and, for the most part, refuses to retire. I just wish that he would stop working one of these days and enjoy all that he has worked so hard for in his life. With that said, I don’t plan to ever stop working either. So, I will end this simply by saying Happy Father’s Day Dad. Thank you for all the help and support that you have given to me over the years without ever asking for anything in return.