The Gifts Keep Coming

It felt like this for a while. 

During the course of the year we have received countless gifts from friends, family, and coworkers for our son. Having now lived through this, I can say that this is the time in life when you see the greatest amount of generosity. The first couple of months of the year saw the greatest deluge of packages and envelopes, but there is still a light trickle of gifts even as we head into the fall. It is pretty amazing the amount of items we have received over the months and we continue to be thankful for each and every item that we receive (even the ones that we return or exchange).

Admittedly, it can be a little daunting at times with the amount of stuff that has accumulated in our house but, in the end, it is all stuff that we have had to purchase anyway. It is interesting to think about the number of things and boxes that we originally moved into the apartment four years ago, the increased amount of stuff that we moved from the apartment to our current house, and the volume that will have to be packed and moved to our next home. And I am sure that the accumulation won’t stop there either.

I wish that I was as thoughtful as many of the people that we have in our life. Time and again, I have been presented with the same or similar opportunities and for one reason or another (usually finances or forgetfulness) too long a time passes and the opportunity is gone. I certainly have to get better at this as it is also a time to pay it forward and show the same generosity that has been shown to us. Hopefully there are many more opportunities coming up.

Sometimes I forget about just how great many of the people in our life are and this experience has been a clear reminder of quality of people that we have in our life. And don’t get me wrong, it is not about the numbers. Some of the greatest (and many time most useful) items have been the small thoughtful things that served us well during this learning process. Sometimes it wasn’t even a gift. There have been many times when the help or a willing ear have meant a great deal when we needed them. The gifts have only proven even more how much others car about us and our son. That is what it is all about and that is what we try to convey to our son each and every day.

More Stuff

When our son was born we experienced a massive influx of stuff. Actually, it started well before his arrival basically as soon as we moved into our current rental. Since the time we began unpacking, it seems as though there is something new that comes through the door just about every week. Sometimes even multiple times a week. While it does add to the massive amount of stuff contained within the walls of our home, we remain grateful for each and every one of the gift that we have received.

Of course, this is all in addition to the things that we find ourselves buying for our son as well. You could even say that we are on the verge of having a serious problem with the number of things that we buy for our baby. The things we buy aren’t expensive, they are just the little toys, outfits, and other things that we happen to see in the store or online. Some of them have proven to be necessities while others are far from that definition. Sometimes we just can’t help it and find ourselves coming home from a weekend breakfast with one or two small items from the shop next to the restaurant.

Obviously, we are not the only ones as we have found that there are people on both sides of our families that have the same ‘problem’. Every time we go to a family event, party, or get together, we leave with more bags than that which we arrived. Again, nothing over the top, just the small toys and outfits that others see in the store and can’t resist spoiling our son.

The funny thing is that with each small item I purchase for him he usually ends up with a little money in the bank as well. Especially lately I have found myself paying for things in cash. While I keep a good stockpile of quarters in the car all of the other change goes into his little bank on his bookshelf multiple times per week. I have always had the habit of doing this but now at least it is contributing to something more than just a ‘fun fund’.

The house remains the same size while the amount of stuff within the walls continues to grow. We knew that we would be getting a lot of gifts around the time he was born but we didn’t expect this much or for it to go on for this long. After all, he is only just over 4 months old at this point. I just hope that we doesn’t expect this same generosity to continue when he gets older and given his current indifference to gifts there is a good chance that will be the case.

Pulling Things Together

The last fellowship night at the lodge before a stated meeting is always an interesting one as I try to figure out the last few things that need to be done. This is also the night when I double check to make sure that I have all the supplied needed for the meeting and that everything is in place. While I am doing this the steward and some of the officers are going through the same process and making sure that they are prepared for the meeting.

As I was running through the list and sifting through the mail that I had just pulled from the post office, there were a couple of items that remained on my list that I was certain I wouldn’t be able to get done in the next couple of days… at least, I wouldn’t be able to get them done myself. Time and distance were both deterrents in these instances but there were brothers at the lodge that had a little more flexibility. So I was finally able to coordinate with a couple of the brothers in attendance last night to finish off a couple last minute errands for the lodge. It is a rarity that I ever ask and I am always grateful that the assistance is there when I need it.

Hopefully everything will continue progressing as planned and all the pieces will be in place when I arrive at the lodge tomorrow night. I would have liked to have seen more people at the lodge last night, a couple that I was expecting to see didn’t walk through the door, but we always seem to have enough brothers together to make sure that things get done. Lately I have been the one missing these meetings and when I am occasionally there I miss the weekly fellowship all over again.

One more day to go and things are coming together. It should be a busy meeting this month and there has been a lot of work that has been put in to make sure that things got done. Thankfully, there have been many people both at Grand Lodge and brothers from my lodge that have been willing to put in the effort to cover a few of the things that I simply haven’t had time to do. Every meeting is a collective effort by every brother… this is a fact that is too often overlooked. Without each of the brothers in attendance last night (as well as other not in attendance), these meetings would be difficult, if not impossible, to pull together.

Reflections On Father’s Day

My dad with my grandfather (my mom's dad) from before I was born.

Today I was once again out of the apartment. Usually I don’t like to be out and about two days in a row but there was a darn good reason to get back on the road. This time it was a short trip to my parent’s house about 15 minutes down the road so that I could spend time with the best man I have ever known, my father.  

Father’s Day is commonly seen as a compliment to Mother’s Day and the history of the day expounds upon that progression. A good summary, as is commonly the case, can befound on Wikipedia which outlines the history of Father’s Day in the following way:

Father's Day was inaugurated in the United States in the early 20th century to complement Mother's Day in celebrating fatherhood and male parenting.

After the success obtained by Anna Jarvis with the promotion of Mother's Day in the US, some individuals, such as Sonora Dodd, wanted to create similar holidays for other family members, and Father's Day was the choice most likely to succeed. There were other persons in the US who independently thought of "Father's Day", but the credit for the modern holiday is often given to Sonora Dodd of Central Methodist Episcopal Church, who was the driving force behind its establishment.

Father's Day was founded in Spokane, Washington at the YMCA in 1910 by Sonora Smart Dodd, who was born in Arkansas. Its first celebration was in the Spokane YMCA on June 19, 1910. Her father, the Civil War veteran William Jackson Smart, was a single parent who raised his six children there. After hearing a sermon about Jarvis' Mother's Day in 1909 at Central Methodist Episcopal Church, she told her pastor that fathers should have a similar holiday honoring them. Although she initially suggested June 5, her father's birthday, the pastors did not have enough time to prepare their sermons, and the celebration was deferred to the third Sunday of June. Several local clergymen accepted the idea, and on 19 June 1910, the first Father's Day, "sermons honoring fathers were presented throughout the city."

However, in the 1920s, Dodd stopped promoting the celebration because she was studying in the Art Institute of Chicago, and it faded into relative obscurity, even in Spokane. In the 1930s Dodd returned to Spokane and started promoting the celebration again, raising awareness at a national level. She had the help of those trade groups that would benefit most from the holiday, for example the manufacturers of ties, tobacco pipes, and any traditional present to fathers. Since 1938 she had the help of the Father's Day Council, founded by the New York Associated Men's Wear Retailers to consolidate and systematize the commercial promotion. Americans resisted the holiday during a few decades, perceiving it as just an attempt by merchants to replicate the commercial success of Mother's Day, and newspapers frequently featured cynical and sarcastic attacks and jokes. But the trade groups did not give up: they kept promoting it and even incorporated the jokes into their adverts, and they eventually succeeded. By the mid-1980s the Father's Council wrote that "(...) [Father's Day] has become a Second Christmas for all the men's gift-oriented industries."

A bill to accord national recognition of the holiday was introduced in Congress in 1913. In 1916, President Woodrow Wilson went to Spokane to speak in a Father's Day celebration and wanted to make it official, but Congress resisted, fearing that it would become commercialized. US President Calvin Coolidge recommended in 1924 that the day be observed by the nation, but stopped short of issuing a national proclamation. Two earlier attempts to formally recognize the holiday had been defeated by Congress. In 1957, Maine Senator Margaret Chase Smith wrote a proposal accusing Congress of ignoring fathers for 40 years while honoring mothers, thus "[singling] out just one of our two parents". In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson issued the first presidential proclamation honoring fathers, designating the third Sunday in June as Father's Day. Six years later, the day was made a permanent national holiday when President Richard Nixon signed it into law in 1972.

More and more there are moment in my life when I notice that I am beginning to sound or act like my dad (not in the Harry Chapin sort of way) and I couldn’t be happier about that fact. It throws my wife off every once in a while when she notices these things but whenever she points them out I just smile, nod, and think to myself how appreciative I am of that fact. Even the times when my dad and I discuss things we seem to think along the same lines and the discussion progresses quickly… we can summarize the problems of the world rather quickly when we get on a roll.

I wouldn’t trade any of the moments that I have had with my father for anything and I am grateful for all that he has taught me both when instructing me in how to do something, supporting me when things aren’t going well, and the lectures he gave me when I screwed up (I know, your shocked that I’m not a perfect angel). While it may not have been obvious at the time, each of those kinds of moments shaped me into who I am today. Not perfect but much better off for having such a mentor in my life.

While I don’t expect to ever accomplish all that my father has in his life I am trying every day to at least come close. Of course, I doubt that this will ever happen as he still works hard every day and, for the most part, refuses to retire. I just wish that he would stop working one of these days and enjoy all that he has worked so hard for in his life. With that said, I don’t plan to ever stop working either. So, I will end this simply by saying Happy Father’s Day Dad. Thank you for all the help and support that you have given to me over the years without ever asking for anything in return.