The Night Before

The small memorial at Orange County Choppers. 

I have little recollection regarding the night before 9/11/01. I remember that the semester was just getting started and that I had class early the next morning. I know that I was preparing for a trip into the city for the ASVAB and that I was working on scheduling a meeting with the President of the college to discuss starting an ROTC partnership with Southern New Hampshire University (a partnership was later formed with MIT). I can also faintly recall hearing the sounds of the Giants’ Monday Night Football game coming from a dorm room a few feet away but there is little else that my memory possesses.

Overall, it was just another cool New England night with the biggest concern of those around me was starting off the year right and making sure that they got to class on time the following morning. When I woke up on Tuesday morning I didn’t hear anything out of the ordinary and I went about the early morning preparing for class and taking a slow walk to the Academic Building. It really was a beautiful beginning to the day with only a few thin clouds in the sky, a light breeze coming off of the bay, and the temperature remaining crisp and comfortable.

When I walked through the doors and glanced up at the television perched in the corner I could see that something was going on but didn’t really take the time to watch and process what was transpiring. I was running a little behind getting to class but managed to get there by 8:50am, there was little else on everyone’s mind and the conversation quickly lead to an early dismissal about 5 minutes later. As I retraced my steps back through the building, I once again looked up at that same television just as the second plane struck the South Tower.

This is when we all knew that this wasn’t simply an accident and as the news and speculation streamed across the screen I quickly pulled out my cell phone and called my dad to make sure that his meeting at the World Trade Center the day before didn’t carry over into the morning. Thankfully, it seems as though I was one of the last to place a successful call as cell phone service was nearly nonexistent by the time I got back to my dorm room and turned on the news. As Peter Jennings shuffled through the information we all turned up the volume of our televisions and walked outside to try and catch our breath. And as the fighter jets screamed above our heads low enough to read the warnings on the underbelly of the planes, we could hear the reports come in that the first tower had collapsed.

The rest of the week remains absent from memory as days seemingly condensed into seconds while minutes felt like weeks. Fifteen years later and I still have those memories etched in my mind. And I am sure that fifteen years from now they will remain as vivid as they are today.  

Darting To The Lodge

That is not my car... but it is for now.

Given the conditions of the roads and still feeling stiff and sore from the accident, I hesitated heading over to the lodge last night. However, there were a multitude of meetings that I needed to take care of this week and driving to Ardmore was the most efficient means of getting everything done. So, while not the most comfortable option, I slowly navigated the bright white Dodge Dart rental around the suburban pothole minefield and made it to the lodge in plenty of time to check the mail and settle in before the next brother walked through the door.

As it turned out, I was not the only one having a bit of an off week as there were a couple of meetings that had to be postponed due to personal reasons. However, even with a few brothers having to miss the fellowship night, the lodge was still busy with nearly a dozen scattered throughout the building. Some of us were discussing various topics in the hall while others were practicing for the upcoming degree work. And, of course, we also had our new candidates in attendance nearing what they need to know before taking the next step.

Much of my night, without the aforementioned meetings, was regarding matters unrelated to the lodge. The first conversation I had was with a brother who will be helping me with some of the home renovation projects that I mentioned in a previous post. We also discussed my recent accident and reviewed some of the lessons that we each have learned over the years through personal experience as well as the accounts told by others. With books in hand it was also an opportunity to share with my brothers the work that has finally come to fruition in recent months (more about those later).

Finally, toward the end of the night, my cousin arrived to both take care of some replacement SAR paperwork and also to catch up a bit. It is great to have this common bond with him and have a space where we can meet and talk about our lodges, work, family, and anything else that may come to mind. It is also a great opportunity to introduce him to some of the brothers from the lodge in case he ever wanted to join us for a meeting. While not all of the meeting I had planned for took place, it was still a productive night and while I didn’t get home until much later than expected, at least I could relax knowing that a few things were crossed off my list for the week.

TMI Tuesday: Screams In The Night

One of the scariest sounds that I have ever heard is when we have been startled from a deep sleep by the screams from our son echoing across the room through the monitor. While my wife’s hearing is more in tune with the displeasures of our son, when I am able to remain unconscious to the troubles around us, there are times when it doesn’t matter how sound a slumber, the scream that our son makes could wake anyone up… even me!

Just over a week ago this seemed to be the pattern for a few nights as our son spiked a fever well into triple digits. It was a time of little sleep, especially for my wife, as all we could do for a couple of nights was monitor, give him medicine, hold him, and dunk him in the tub if he got too hot. Unfortunately, I am little help during these times as our son insists on having his mommy but will occasionally want his daddy within his sight line. This episode, this sequence of nights, was far beyond those that we have dealt with previously.

Even without a temperature and feeling perfectly fine, there are moments when our son will wake up and make some noise before falling back to sleep. What can I say, he is loud when he shifts just like his daddy. There are also moments when he will fuss or even whimper for a minute or two before he either screams because of some uncomfortable padding under his bottom or he will unleash a different kind of sound that fills the night, lay down, and sleep better than he did before he woke up.

There was also a period of adjustment when we moved into the house when we couldn’t quite get the thermostat right… our son has become rather particular with regard to ideal sleeping temperature in his room. Over the first couple of weeks we were able to figure it out. Who am I kidding, my wife is the one that fine-tuned the temperature. And now, if there are nights that are a little warmer or cooler, our son adjusts his position in the crib sleeping either in a slightly cooler spot near the wall or a little warmer away from it.

And while we have done everything that we can to make him as comfortable as possible, sometimes there are nights when he doesn’t feel well. Sometimes there are evenings when he is startled by a nightmare (also a scream that is hard to forget). Sometimes he simply loses track of his stuffed animal and/or binkie. And other times there are nights when he gets a little lonely being on the second floor by himself or when we didn’t spend enough time playing with him during the day and needs a little more snuggle time with mommy and/or daddy. But these nights are nothing in comparison to that heart wrenching siren.

Reindeer Down!

The Christmas decorations around town are quite festive and are pretty understated compared to those that I am used to encountering around the Main Line. And while there are houses here and there that have light displays a few bulbs shy of Clark Griswold, there actually isn’t much in the way of individual decorations up and down the streets. It seems as though we all agree that being out here, away from the densely populated areas, the night provides more of a light show than anyone could ever string along their eaves.

We are also in an area where people are incredibly kind and welcoming in the course of our weekly encounters. We have rarely come across someone who wasn’t pleasant and, more often than not, there have been kind words and wishes shared and reciprocated. However, given the occasional sounds in the distance and across the street, Rudolph might want to consider investing in some Kevlar. Who knows, someone around here might hold him personally responsible for Grandma’s death.

I can see it now. After their usual tales from NORAD telling watchers and listeners that Santa was crossing the Atlantic on his way to the East Coast, millions of children lay their heads town struggling to fall asleep. Then, all of the sudden…

from down in the den there arose such a clatter

that they sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

When what to their wondering eyes should appear

but a special report saying there’s nothing to fear.

As the reports pour in the news conveyed by the third string anchormen seemed grim…

they showed little emotion and went straight to their work,

the search teams were deployed and the kids when berserk.

And laying the report just off the screen,

they echoed the outcome which lead to a scream.

They cut to the authorities at the scene of the crash,

who didn’t hold back not fearing the backlash.

And they heard them proclaim at they signed off from the sight,

Rudolph was dead and Santa was grounded for the night.

As it turns out, as was reported the following day,

Rudolph isn’t bullet proof and pulled down the sleigh.

A 12 gauge took him out and with dead weight dragging them down,

the other reindeer couldn’t support Santa and they crashed in a small town.

The fire took Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen

but only singed Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen.

The presents were gone and Santa was pissed

because all that was left was a double checked list.

TMI Tuesday: I Want To Talk To Daddy NOW!

Part of my daily routine is calling my wife while on my way home after work. I have done this for a while and in the past it wasn’t as regular as it has become over the past year. Of course, now my wife and I have little say as to whether my phone is going to ring while I am getting on the highway.

Every day, so I have been told, when my wife picks our son up from work he babbles in the back seat saying “da da” over and over again as if it has become his infant mantra. This usually continues for much of the afternoon (and sometimes into the night) until he finally gets to the point when he reaches for my wife’s phone, says “da da”, and waves. He may only be ten months old but he has no issues getting his message across… I want to talk to dada now!

This is pretty much the same routine regardless of whether he is having a good day or a bad day and sometimes, for some reason, hearing my voice on the phone is one of the few things that will calm him down. However, consider yourself warned, if he is expecting to talk to daddy and you decide to call, he will not readily accept this and will be rather vocal about his displeasure. I am told that it is an interesting site to behold when the voice on the other end of the line is not that of his daddy… basically, imagine being cursed out in baby babble.

Of course, I am of two minds when I think about this routine that we have and the close relationship that I have been able to build with our son. While he knows my voice and he looks forward to seeing me every night, I am usually only able to spend anywhere between 30 and 60 minutes with him per day. And that is if I don’t have anything going on that night. This is why I am happy to have the relationship that we do but, at the same time, I don’t like the fact that I see him for such a small amount of time.

It’s almost as if I can hear Harry Chapin warming up back stage letting me know that I am walking a fine line. He is ready to go and can start singing at any time if I screw up. That is the last thing that I want to happen and why when I am home I give my son as much attention as I am able, play with him, and tell him I love him whenever I am given the chance. It may not be ideal but, so far, it is seems to maintain the strength of our connection.

Prayers, Candles, and Presents

A couple of nights ago we started Hanukkah a little early. Over the last month we had bought a few too many toys for our son so we figured we would begin part of the evening routine a couple of days prior. He didn’t really know what to make of it but he was happy with what we got him and seeing that smile made the few extra dollars seem like the bargain of the century. After all, this is his first Hanukkah and we want to make it a little more special so we have tried to make it as fun as possible while setting the ground work for a new holiday tradition.

We are starting this tradition as a family… just the three of us this year. Throughout the weekend, my wife and I made enough brisket to last for the eight nights and we made sure, beginning tonight, to light the candles with the proper blessings. It is only after the candles are lit, which our son seems to enjoy in and of itself, when we go back into the office closet and pull out the next toy for our son to play with. Reading the transliteration in front of our son know that, at one point I could read the Hebrew, reignited my desire to learn this beautiful language.

There is something calming about slowing down for a few moments, reading the prayers, and carefully lighting each candle. It really allows all three of us to just be in the moment while we enjoy our faith as a family. This followed by the happiness in our son’s face as he played with the toys (and the boxes that they came in) are really what makes this a special time of year and I look forward to sharing with him more and more about the holiday and the significance that it holds.

Of course, there is also another fun part of the evening as I was able to hide the small gifts that I have been accumulating over the past several weeks from my wife. Well, most of them are small. While the vast majority were clearance finds or daily deals, I was also able to find something that I had been meaning to get for her for some time now. Thankfully the camera that I was looking at went on sale and I was able to stay within budget. So now, each night, we will have images to accompany our memories and, most importantly, I might have made up, at least a little bit, for my mistakes during her birthday.

And now, with the candles having long since faded, and my wife and son sleeping, I am sitting here writing this and looking forward to the rest of the Hanukkah holiday. I am so glad that we are able to have this experience throughout the week and I can’t wait to see the smiles every evening. And, just think, it only gets better from here.

Trick, Treat, Or Video Game

My wife and I are not ones that put stock in the Halloween holiday. It has actually proven to be more of an inconvenience than anything else most years. We are actually one of those houses that simply puts a bowl of candy out as the sun goes down with the hope that some kid doesn’t dump the whole thing in his bag or bucket. Of course, we mitigate some of this by putting half out at the beginning of the night and the other half a little later after having checked the rate of depletion. Generally speaking, this keeps things pretty quiet outside our door.

However, while we don’t care much for the holiday itself, we appreciate the opportunity that this night has afforded us over the years. I am not talking about the amount of money that we have to spend on candy (seems like a waste to me) or the scant leftovers remaining in the bowl after the noise subsides. The evening gives us an opportunity to clean out the house a little bit… in the past we have handed out Starting Lineup figures (they were actually cheaper than candy that year) and this year we were able to add something even better to the bountiful bowl.

A few seconds after I finished dumping the rest of the candy in the bowl tonight, the next group of kids walked up to the front door to inspect the offerings. It is safe to say that based on their wide eyed expressions and near shaking excitement, none of them expected to go home with a free Wii video game. I have to admit that we both chuckled a little bit when we could hear the next group of kids come up to the door after being summoned by the previous visitors and proclaiming “this is the best house ever… by far.” What they didn’t realize is that they were helping us out a little.

Unbeknownst to them, we spent some time earlier in the day putting together a trade in order on Amazon after we had come to the conclusion that we were probably not going to be using the various video game systems that have been collecting dusk in the basement and laying unplugged on our shelf in the family room. All those games that Amazon wouldn’t take (that were age appropriate) were what we put out in that tiny candy bowl. By the end of the night, all the games were either packed in boxes ready to be shipped or in the hands of neighborhood kids. However, the most important thing is that it cleared out about five boxes worth of stuff that was not being used. Everybody won tonight.

Weathered By The Change

It has now been two thirds of a year and the weather is slowly returning to what it was when our son entered the world. The seasons have changed so quickly that it is hard to believe that soon the slight chill in the breeze will become a bitter wind and we will find ourselves looking out the window at the falling snow thinking about the inches that coated the ground when we left for the hospital that morning. Eight months and a heck of a lot has changed since it was just the two of us.

It certainly hasn’t been the easiest experience but it is also one that we wouldn’t trade for anything and we now understand the fondness with which people look back on those early months. It may not seem like it at the time, but those days are full of great moments and memories that will undoubtedly continue to fill our minds as our son grows. All the changes and milestones are things that are both surprising when they happen and amazing when we think about how big he has gotten and what he is now able to do all by himself.

Lately it has been a bit of a challenge with the constant colds and teething but it is the brief moments, even glimpses that put things in perspective and make it all worth the bags under our eyes and the fog in our minds. Even now, watching him peacefully sleeping in his crib, all of those tough hours seem to fade away. And knowing that, when we walk up to the crib to get him up tomorrow morning he will give us the biggest smile that his face can handle, all of those instances when we have doubted ourselves will be forgotten. It is the dichotomy that many people tried to explain to us before he was born but that we were unable to fully comprehend until now.

While there were nights and hours that felt like they would last an eternity, eight months has seemed to be but an instant, almost a singular moment in time. Our memories may contradict that sentiment but the reality is that this is all going by so fast… sometimes too fast. If anything, there are times when I wish I could slow down the hands on the clock, look around, and take everything in. Of course, there are also moment that I wish we had a fast forward button but they are definitely outweighed by all the joy and happiness that we get to hug each and every day. Happy 8 months baby!

TMI Tuesday: I’ll Bite Your Finger!

Over the past few weeks our son has been going back and forth between the kind and loving baby that likes laughing and smiling to one that needs to snuggle with his mommy and daddy while a look of pain and fear crossed his face. The later usually coincides with nearly his entire hand shoved in his mouth mere millimeters away from making himself throw up (sometimes he does go too far). We are now in the midst of the teething period when there is little that we can do besides keeping things pressed against his gums and trying to make sure the resulting congestion is cleared away especially during the night.

Most of the time a binkie will suffice but there are moments when there isn’t enough pressure and either a cold rolled wash cloth or a knuckle are what he needs to munch on for a few minutes. Even with his teeth slowly protruding further from his gums it doesn’t hurt (my wife disagrees with this point) and he is rather entertained by the fact (sometimes) that he is biting daddy. It is hard to watch when he realizes he is in pain and all we want to do is make it go away. In the end there is little that we can do but the things above and the occasional dose of Tylenol… whiskey might have to be next or a Manischewitz lollipop (which did wonders in the past). After all, it would be watered down by all the drool anyway.  

Since he now has a couple of teeth that have come in and a couple more trying to break through, we have also added brushing his nubs to the morning and bedtime routines. This is something that is still a little odd for all involved and definitely an activity that our son does not enjoy. But we are all slowly getting used to it and his reaction could be worse like when we try to clip his fingernails… that is a scream I could have lived a full life without hearing.  

Also adding to the misery is the constant ebb and flow of various viruses that he either picks up from other babies or things that mommy and daddy happen to carry home from work. All of these things combine to make sleeping a crap shoot and our evenings a test of both patience and endurance. But even when he has those bad days or nights he knows that mommy and daddy are right there to help him and that is really what is important during this time in his life.

Two Years Since The Night Was My Day

While there certainly have been a lot of changes that have happened over the past year, both good and bad, the difference between our lives two years ago versus what it is now is even more staggering. In addition to moving to a new place, two years ago I was still working the night shift at our old apartment building. It was about this time in 2013 when I handed in my two week notice and prepared for the long days ahead working two jobs during this important transition. The next day, October 2, 2013, I started with my current employer and haven’t looked back since.

Not only was this a moment that restarted my career, it was a time that marked the end of what was a rather difficult period for me and my wife as we had spent the previous year and a half just trying to get by as we both worked for an hourly wage while trying to find the time to spend together. We had to just put our heads down and work trying to get enough money to pay bills and cover living expenses. Of course, with our finances so tight it also meant that we accrued some debt (to put it lightly). Things began to change once I rejoined the daytime workforce.

The past two years at my new company have been tremendous. While my initial thought heading into the job was that it was going to be a great place to work and advance my career, I really had no idea what to expect or whether I would be able to shake off the rust and get my career moving again. It was a bit of a challenge the first few days but I was surprisingly able to get things moving again rather quickly. And it was a good thing as those first few months getting the company up and running was both trying and rewarding at the same time. By the end of the first six months I was starting to feel completely comfortable once again and just in time for my review and promotion.

Since then it has been both a lot of work and also tremendously rewarding to watch the company grow. Some things happen for a reason and being out of the industry so long is now paying dividends in my being able to work where I do. It has been a great relief to have a career again that I enjoy and working for a company that sees all of us as a family rather than just a name on an account. I am looking forward to the next year, two years, and decades after that.

TMI Tuesday: Welcome to 3AM

While the song has no relation to the situation except for the coincidence of time, I couldn’t help by despise Matchbox Twenty this weekend as our son insisted on waking up each night at 3AM. It was a collusion of events last week that caused the constant sleeplessness with his new daycare routine, needing more mommy and daddy time, and the lingering congestion from croup. It was not a fun experience but one that we have been expecting to happen (we actually thought this would be a more regular occurrence during this first year).

Of course, this wasn’t the usual stirring in the middle of the night that can be remedied by putting his binkie back in and rubbing his head, this was the “you better not leave me until I am dead to the world asleep” kind of wakeup. Each time he was aroused from slumber, the screaming was almost immediate… it seemed to be a combination of tiredness, frustration, fear, and loneliness. It is a heartbreaking sound to hear echoing through the monitor. However, while I clearly heard each instance, to be honest, it was my wife that was the one that got out of bed to comfort our son while I did my best to keep my eyes open (many times I was unsuccessful).

And this was only the beginning of the fun each day as when the alarm rang out in the morning, it came all too soon and left us all with headaches that persisted throughout the day. Each of us trudged through our days with a set of matching family luggage strapped to our eyes. At this point, I was really hating Cat Stevens as well (or whatever his name is now).

It has been a bit of a testing time for all of us but, as of last night, things seem to be getting a little better as there was no heart wrenching screams to be heard and the remedy for waking up a little earlier than our liking was back to binkie and a quick head rub. The morning was also a bit more pleasant as we were all able to sleep better than we had in weeks. But the best part about our son feeling better (besides not being woken up at 3AM) was the fact that when I got home from work today his smile and laugh had returned which made me forget, at least briefly, about the recent nights.  

TMI Tuesday: Waiting For Daddy

One of the things that I didn’t think about when I decided on my new car was the sound that it makes when I lock it after getting home at night. It is a rather inconsequential attribute and I frankly didn’t car but I wasn’t thinking about how that sound was associated with my return home. With the Malibu, my son had gotten used to the sound it made when I locked the car. He knew that I was home when he heard the noise. Thankfully, the Cherokee makes a very similar sound.

While there are many nights when my car gives away my arrival, there are a several evenings when he is oblivious to my walking through the front door. This is usually the case when he is fussing or sleeping. If he is awake, as soon as he hears my voice he begins looking around trying to find me. It is quite the cute sight. Once he sees me, his eyes brighten and he gives me a big smile (unless he is particularly grumpy that day). I don’t care what kind of day I have had up until then, it is a good day from that point forward.

Because she sees this every work day, this kind of annoys my wife. However, this past weekend I was able to be on the other end of the situation as I watched our son during the day while my wife ran some errands that she had been meaning to get to. Our son was not happy to see his mommy leave but I was able to keep him active and occupied while she was gone. As soon as I heard her pull up and lock the car, I let our baby know, and the search began. As soon as she walked through the door and he turned his head, the same bright eyed smile surfaced.

So I guess we are doing okay so far. Our son looks forward to seeing each of us and misses his mommy and daddy when they have to go out for a while. It makes me think about how hard it is going to be when we put him in daycare and, down the road, when we send him off to school. At the same time, I can still look forward to that smile and the ensuing cooing when we are reunited at the end of the day. That is, of course, if I don’t screw up between now and then.

Throwing Things Together

With my wife’s day booked with taking care of our baby and a myriad of other things, the usual routine when I get home after work is to spend time with our son and to get dinner ready. It is sometimes a difficult decision as to what to do first… should I hold my son for a little bit or get dinner in the oven and hold him afterward or do I hold him before and after? I am a sucker for my son so it is usually the third option.

Thankfully, I am able to throw something decent together pretty fast. This is largely because I paid attention (although it may not have seemed like it at the time) to my mom when I was growing up watching her pull together dinner when she got home from work. While I am not nearly as good as she is, I do my best to get things done quickly and everyone fed at a reasonable time. Given my work schedule, reasonable is any time before 8:00 pm.

My wife is still baffled at times by how fast I am able to get things done (not on chicken strip nights but other evenings) but it is something that I have become used to over the years. It all comes down to the simple fact of knowing what things go together and using as few ingredients and steps as possible. I know how to follow a recipe and still do on occasion, but that takes longer and during the work week I don’t have the extra time. This is also why I don’t bake.

At the same time, I guess that you could say that I do have a few ‘recipes’ as there are combinations that I use regularly using the measuring technique of shake, dump, sprinkle, and cover. So far, nothing has been really bad. Some meals are more unique than others but they have at least been edible. It is all about knowing what flavors go together and it works for me just don’t ask me for exact measurements.  

It is a routine and a way of doing things that continues to work for us. Sure there are nights when I pick something up but knowing what ingredients work well together gives us the option. Maybe if I enjoyed cooking I would spend those few extra minutes but at this point I doubt it as the more time I spend in the kitchen, the more time I am away from my smiling baby boy. So I am just going to continue throwing things together.

The Other Conversations

Thankfully we didn't find this many keys.

Having finished up the notice late last week and getting the email sent the day before, it was time to head to the lodge to make sure that everything was ready to go before the stated meeting on Thursday night. Of course, I had to make a few stops on the way to Ardmore (more about that in a later post) so I was a little late in my arrival. Heading into the evening, I knew of several brothers who would not be able to make it so I was prepared for a very light turnout when I walked through the door.

While it wasn’t a large group, I was pleasantly surprised to find a small group of us discussing some of the other things that needed to be addressed both before the meeting and over the summer. Sometimes it is in these free flowing conversations when you can really find the passions that drive the masons who make up the membership. These casual nights are a great time to discuss and sometimes debate a variety of topics or changes that some of us would like to see happen.

That is the really interesting thing about some of these fellowship nights. While everyone has an equal voice during the meetings, many times there are a slew of things that have to get done that night, presentations to be made, and motions to be proposed. Sometimes those things that you would like to discuss can get lost in the lateness of the evening. At the same time, it is good to discuss ideas before a meeting so that they can be more fully formed before presenting them.

Of course, these nights are also perfect for the various scavenger hunts that highlight the year. Last night we were in search of some elusive keys to the display cabinets. We thought that we had completed the thorough search a couple of months ago but, somehow, another possible location was brought to our attention last night. So we all headed back down to my office, walked over to the corner, and pried open a large steel box which has remained sealed for the past several years.

Inside we found the keys that we were looking for and others that we were not looking for. So now a new hunt begins as we try to figure out which keys go to which locks. All the while there will be casual conversations among brothers about anything and everything. Sometimes it will have something to do with lodge and other times it will be a means of continual bonding between members or our fraternal family. All of this because we take the time to show up on Tuesday nights, enjoy the relaxed fellowship, and work together to accomplish even the smallest of tasks like trying to find a key.

From Shrine To Lodge

Here is a photo of the Lu Lu Shrine from above. 

I originally started my day doubting that I would make it to the lodge last night but, just in case, I told my son not to wait up for me. While many doubt his comprehension of this fact, it has been useful to let him know if I am going to be out late that night. If I don’t let him know he tends to stay up refusing to go to sleep until I walk through the door. What can I say, he’s an advanced child. Anyway, back to the topic at hand.

Toward the end of the morning I began getting emails and texts regarding a check that, upon further review, was supposed to have been drafted after the April Stated Meeting. However, once I was able to speak with the Treasurer over the phone, we came to the realization that the check was never made out. This was an issue as we were now faced with the issue of having no check written that we were supposed to present the following night, Wednesday, at an event in Norristown. Further complicating matters, all three of us that are required to sign checks were not planning on being at the lodge.

So, after a few emails, texts, and calls back and forth I had my route for the night. After work, I got on the highway and headed toward the lodge… this time with a little detour along the way (two actually thanks to the closure of Plymouth Road). For the first time since I attended the one day class and became a Mason, I pulled into the drive way of the Lu Lu Shrine and proceeded to the back door where the Treasurer greeted me with check book in hand.

We filled in the check according to the amount previously approved during the meeting and we both signed it. Having a few minutes to space before having to leave, I got a brief refresher tour of the Shrine. While I don’t have the time or finances to become a Shriner at the moment, I plan to do so in the future. In the meantime, I look forward to bringing the family to a few of the events that are coming up over the summer and toward the end of the year.

From the Shrine I drove to the lodge where I had a number of quick discussion with a few of the brothers. Some related to the lodge while others were far from masonic in substance. A few minutes later the Worshipful Master pulled into the parking lot. We are all limited on time these days so I handed him the check to sign and bring with him the following night.

After checking the mail and finishing up a few conversations I looked at my watch and noticed that I had made pretty good time. So much so that I was able to get in the car and get home in time to see my son smile at me, help my wife give him a bath, and put him to bed. It was the best ending I could have hoped for what turned out to be a hectic day.

Where’s The Mail?

This year it seems like every lodge meeting is sneaking up on me. As I have documented in this blog, I used to have the routine of heading over to the lodge every Tuesday to check in and make sure that everything was taken care of. This was especially true the Tuesday before a stated meeting. No surprise, my schedule has changed and I now find myself trying to get the same amount of work done in about half the time (if I am lucky).

Last night I was finally able to make it back to Ardmore to catch up with the dedicated brothers in attendance and also to check the mail. Well, that was the plan. I was able to speak with many of the brothers in attendance but the mail was a different situation. As it had been some time since I last cleaned out the box, the post office decided to hold much of the mail behind the counter in a bin. This may not be a concern for some but that is simply not the case.

The only times that I have been able to get back to the main line have been in the evenings and occasionally on the weekends when we have something scheduled beyond a simple trip to the post office. Basically, the times that I am in the area I am either busy doing something else or it is long after the post office has closed. I guess there is going to have to be a special trip or detour to Ardmore in the very near future.

However, as is always the case, the best part of the night is seeing that the lodge is still active. We have had some bumps along the way this year at the lodge but it is great to see that everything and everyone is still moving in the right direction. The new brothers have really taken ownership of their masonic education and I continue to look forward to seeing them participate more and more as time goes on. Who knows, maybe there is a new secretary among them for when I am ready to hand things off (years down the road).

Things remain busy at lodge, work, and at home. While hectic at times (most of the time actually) I don’t think I would change a thing. Well, maybe longer hours at the post office but that is about it. Maybe, just maybe, things will calm down a bit over the next few months but I wouldn’t be surprised if the opposite were true. Regardless of what happens to the schedule, things will continue moving forward and that is really all that any of us can do.

Changing Things Around

I had both been looking forward to and dreading this past week for months because of the many long nights that were on my schedule. I knew that things would be different by this time of year with our son having arrived and while I wanted to get out and get back to my previous routine I was also dreading being away from our baby for so many nights in a row. This week was originally planned so that I would be at the lodge on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. At best I was expecting that I could miss Tuesday but that didn’t change the fact that I would be out late the other two nights.

This week just goes to show that sometimes you just have to trust the plan that has been laid out before us. With the first front moving in on Tuesday the first night of my week was quickly taken off the table. This was a change that I had contemplated previously so there wasn’t much of a difference on my end. On Wednesday night the schedule remained the same and I was at the lodge catching up with my brothers but, at this point, Thursday night, our state meeting night, was questionable at best. By the time I left for the lodge after work on Wednesday, the stated meeting had been postponed and my week opened up.

It was still hard to be away from my wife and son during the night but at least I was able to slowly get back into things rather than having multiple obligations taking me away from family throughout the week. However, knowing how much I missed them for those few extra hours out of the office makes me wonder how I am going to handle my annual business trip at the end of the month. I guess it is going to take some to get used to the idea and this new reality.

For now, I was only out late once this week and I will be out late once next week as well. Hopefully things will move as quickly as they are currently planned and that my son doesn’t wait up for me like he did on Wednesday. While I hate being away, even for a few extra hours at the end of the day, it is at least occasional and brings be back to a modified routine. It may not be perfectly measured at this point but I will continue measuring the different proportions and gauging where and when I need to remove some things from my schedule.

Going To School…

Ironically, I am writing this post as all the schools in the area are closed due to the heavy snow smothering the area. Thankfully, the flakes held off just long enough so that I was able to make it to school and back home last night without any problems. No, I am not pursuing another graduate degree. I was at the lodge last night and so were many other brothers interested in learning more of the details regarding the first degree as the Sixth Masonic District School of Instruction held their class in Ardmore.

Previously, the school would meet at a set location with the traveling aspect having just been implemented this year to both increase attendance and make things a little more convenient for some of the brothers in the district. It is because of these reasons that I have been unable to attend a meeting of the school until last night. With that said, I was able to participate at the Regional School last April reviewing business of the lodge and that was a whole different experience all together. I am comfortable in my own lodge at my own desk but I can’t say as much about occupying the same chair in one of the meeting rooms at Grand Lodge.

It was an interesting night with the lodge full of brothers that I only see occasionally at Masonic events throughout the year. More importantly, it was a great experience for many of our newly raised brethren who were able to receive instruction on many of the nuances of the ritual work. Many of these details can be overlooked no matter how long someone has been a mason or how many degrees in which they have participated. We all welcomed the instruction and observed intently the timing and exact movements that were corrected throughout the night.

It was fascinating to watch from the vantage point of the Secretary’s desk as I have a limited role in the degrees so I was able to take everything in without having to think about motions or movements. It was important because I have filled in at various times in some of those chairs and it would be nice if I knew what I was doing. With that said, there is no way that I will retain much of the minutia that was reviewed so I guess I will have to continue attending class whenever time permits. Your guess is as good as mine as to where I will find that time!

Valentine’s Day Flu

After a long week for both me and my wife when sleep seemed more like an option rather than a requirement, we headed out to dinner at the local Cheesecake Factory on Friday night. Seemed appropriate since we were coming from her mom’s house and this was the place where the three of us would commonly meet. After the experience we had (it takes talent to mess up a plain well done cheeseburger three times in a single night) it is safe to say that we will not be returning.

The rest of the night was about as uneventful as we could expect. Not easy as we are heading into the last couple of weeks of the pregnancy which has a certain effect on her demeanor which is compounded by the other emotional events that are swirling around our daily life. But it was the weekend and while we didn’t have any particular plans, trips, or even gifts, we were till going to do our best to enjoy a final Valentine’s Day before the baby arrives.

We had our weekend planned out to both take a few moments for ourselves but also to spend some much needed time with family. When we got up on Saturday morning those plans quickly changed as my wife could feel the very beginnings of a fever beginning to surface. All the plans that we had were immediately thrown away and we focused on doing our best to relax and spending a day at home.

By the early afternoon my wife wasn’t feeling any better so we gave the doctor a call to determine what our next course of action should be. Given the fact that she is 38 weeks pregnant it really wasn’t a surprise when they told us to head to the emergency room and get checked out. Hours, numerous tests, and a few naps later and we were finally told that the flu shot that sent her to the same emergency room in October didn’t work.

Once we were able to jump through all the hoops we were finally able to head out the door just as the snow was beginning to pick up. Of course, since it was now nearly eight at night there was only one pharmacy near our house which was open and able to fill the scripts. Four pharmacies and a quick Chinese food take out later and we finally made it home around nine. Everything seemed to settle down and we were both looking forward to sleeping in. That was the thought until my wife began waking me up in the middle of the night saying that her temperature wasn’t going down. It was going to be a long night but at least I didn't get stuck on the Pennsylvania Turnpike for eight hours like I did last year. 

Taking Turns

Yes, I am using this post as an excuse to include another picture of our baby boy!

 With everything that is going on lately with the move, work, lodge, and other things, I was looking forward to going to the next doctor appointment to check on our baby. That’s right, I actually had a reason to look forward to a doctor appointment. With our scheduled checkup a little later in the evening, I left the office a little later than usual and called my wife during the commute. It has been, to say the least, a little chaotic for her lately as well and she too was looking forward to hearing our son’s rapid heartbeat.

In the past we have endured prolonged periods in the waiting room so as the first flakes of precipitation brushed across our cheeks we walked into the office a little early and settled in for what we expected to be another long evening. Thankfully we were wrong as before we could even get settled, and certainly to the displeasure of those who were already waiting, we were escorted back to an examining room. Once all the basic vitals were checked, it was time for my wife to lay down and let the baby take over the moment.

As many of you know and have experienced before, hearing your child’s happy heartbeat takes over the moment allowing for everything else that may be going on in your life to disappear for a brief moment. Last night it couldn’t have come at a better time as that one instant, that fleeting flutter of a moment, made much of the thoughts from the previous few days, weeks, and months disappear from our thoughts. It didn’t last long of course but it was enough to get us through the rest of the day and into the night.

In the end, our baby remains healthy and slightly ahead of schedule. That is really all that we want. It just happens to be a bonus that he is already starting to listen to us, sleeping when we need to sleep, and shifting into a different position when needed. Even if he didn’t do any of those things we would still love him just as much as we do now and that, our new reality as parents, continues to be what is getting us both through many tough moments lately. Essentially, baby is already helping to take care of us know before we have to start taking care of him.

And now we wait for the next appointment. While we just had the most recent checkup last night, we are already looking forward to the next one. Before long he will be here and that is when our lives will really change but, for now, we are enjoying the change that he has already had on our lives.