Driving Down To Media

This morning I decided to give my wife a small respite. Following breakfast and a short stint in the playroom to get some early morning energy out, I packed everything up in the diaper bag and strapped my son in his car seat. It was time for a little road trip to someplace new. I had been thinking about driving my son to the main line for some time now to show him a new place but also somewhere where he could walk. I also wanted to test something out.

As we passed the sights that our son has seen dozen of times before he was rather talkative and wanting to play peekaboo with daddy from the back seat. While on the highway he also wanted to hold my hand as we coasted past the slower cars. Eventually we made it to some unfamiliar roads and his demeanor changed. Like his daddy, he wanted to see as much as he could and was glued to the window of the car taking in each new sight, street, and intersection.

It was actually rather interesting for me as well since it had been a long time since I had driven down these roads and some of the things that I remember passing were no longer part of the suburban landscape (like the Granite Run Mall). Surprisingly on schedule, we made it to Media shortly after ten and, shockingly, found a legal parking spot along the street about a half block from the surprise I had planned for that morning. Similar to during our drive, he was wide eyed as we walked passed all the new buildings, turned the corner, and slowly climbed the steps.

Inside he was mesmerized by the small shiny disks lining the cases and gladly kept browsing as he finished his morning snack. Given my sons previous interest in pocket change and, more so, in paper money, I knew that this would be something to hold his interest and it wasn’t surprising when he decided to meticulously analyze each of the coins in the display case through the glass. This also allowed me to catch up with the proprietor of the store whom I had not seen in years. When I had finished catching up and my son had finished his snack, I finally asked for what I had hoped to pick up while we were there… wheat pennies.

I guess you could say that this is something that I am passing along from my youth as I remember sorting through bags of them and filling in the empty spots in the folders. It is also a way to connect our families as we have a few that have been passed down from my wife’s grandfather that I want to make sure that our son has in the future. They’re inexpensive and every coin shop has them making it easy to pick them up from time to time. What did surprise me this time around was that the store owner handed over a full bag and refused payment saying that my son was “the most well behaved that that has ever been in the store.”

We gratefully accepted and parted ways that morning with my son eyeing his bag of treasure all the way to the car where we locked them up for the remainder of the morning. After strolling up and down the street a few times we returned to the car (with time left on the meter) and made our way back home pretty close to schedule. Tracing back through the same streets and excited from our time out, the baby babble was much more intense on this leg of our excursion and I enjoyed every minute of it.

Different But Similar

There have been several occasions when I have heard people compare the first meeting with a candidate with that of a sales meeting. I wholeheartedly disagree with this premise. Meeting with those men interested in becoming masons should never involve any kind of sale whatsoever and should never come across as such. Meeting with a candidate for the first time should be a time to answer questions and start and interesting conversation. At no point during such conversations have I had the goal of getting a petition signed… my objective has always been to have a great conversation.

By approaching the process in this way it allows all the cards to be put on the table. The potential candidate gets to know me and I get to know them. We find our similarities and, sometimes, we discuss our differences. While I do my best to answer any questions they may have about freemasonry and give a very broad overview of the lodge, the fraternity, and the process of becoming a mason, it is a very open and broad conversation as a whole. Right or wrong, this is how I approach these opportunities to meet interesting people from the community.

This was the case last night as I had previously coordinated a time to meet with a prospective candidate last week. After a brief introduction and welcome, we made our way into the hall and sat at one of the dining tables to simply have a conversation and to get to know one another. Over the course of the evening there were a number of other brothers who introduced themselves and joined the conversation and by the end of the night we had discussed a wide range of topics. However, the most important part of the evening was that we were able to learn a little about him and he was able to learn a little about us as individuals, the lodge, and freemasonry in general.

As we talked about our families and the reasons why freemasonry piqued our interest there were a number of commonalities in our perspectives and in our lives that wouldn’t necessarily be evident to someone who would simply see the two of us talking. The reasons for our interest in the fraternity are nearly identical and we are both interested to learn about our grandfather’s lives within freemasonry. However, he did surprise me by the end of the night by immediately completing a petition on the spot. This surprised me both because I didn’t expect him to do so (I never go beyond handing someone a petition and asking them to think about it) and because it is the same way that I would have reacted had I been given the same situation.

Again, I walked toward the parking lot reinvigorated by the night and excited to have another good man interested in joining our lodge and becoming part of this fantastic fraternity. I consider myself very lucky for having witnessed that same passion and excitement so many times in so many good men over the years (especially over the last several months). There is a lot to be thankful for and a lot to look forward to during the second half of the year.

Seeing Faces To Forget

Throughout this season there have been too many gifts to specifically remember any individual surprise. Actually, this year has been full of generosity from friends, family, and coworkers alike. It has been at times overwhelming but appreciated each end every time that an unexpected box or envelope has been put in our hands. However, since I have written about the many gifts that we received earlier in the year, I will stick with those that we have gotten over the last month or two… basically during the holiday season.

Hanukkah was early this year and it was fun surprising both our son and my wife with gifts for each night… and then some. What I got in return was better than anything that I handed out as the faces that they made were something that I am already looking forward to seeing again next year. However, my wife and I agreed, long before the holiday and prior to settlement on the house, that my gift was a new set of office furniture. Of course, my wife also got me a cordless drill during the holiday which I didn’t expect. All of these things I am going to use for years so I pretty much made out like a bandit.

Toward the end of the month I received my preferred gift, a few times over in fact, of a gift card to a few places that I can make that money stretch as far as possible. In all, between friends, family, and coworkers, we probably received close to $200 in plastic. This was on top of the small gifts and has nothing to do with the horde that our son received. Although he probably would have been just as happy with the boxes and tissue paper. More about that later.

However, like the reactions I received from my wife and son, the best part of the holiday season has been the looks on people’s faces when I hand them an unexpected box or envelope. Many of the brothers at the lodge seemed to refuse reality, my coworkers were shocked, and family members were surprised. For me this is what the holiday season is about regardless of your faith. It has been a great season and a difficult one at the same time but seeing those glimpses of joy allow me to focus only on what is good and happy about this time of year.   

Email Surprise

I got a bit of a surprise when I checked my lodge email yesterday afternoon. What I thought was going to be a simple message making an appeal to the brethren to attend the fellowship night was something that caught me off guard. The first half of the email stated almost exactly what I expected to read but the second half changed things up a bit notifying those in receipt of the email that all furniture and files were being moved out of the Secretary’s office that night. This was clearly the first time that I was hearing about this clean out.

While this is something that we have discussed many times over the past couple of years, I was not aware of this tasking being scheduled so soon. In my position I hear about a lot of the things happening at the lodge but every once in a while I hear something either right before it happens or immediately after the fact. The problem isn’t necessarily in what is taking place but in being prepared when someone comes to me with questions. At the office and at the lodge, my job requires me to know what is going on and when there is a break in communication, issues like we have had over the past year begin popping up and, as a result, my phone begins to ring regularly.

It seems as though we have gone from one extreme to the other. While there were many plans and little action in the past, now there is plenty of action but few plans to be found now. This is obviously not the entire picture but there is no reason why this should have happened so abruptly and why the first time many of us are hearing about these plans is a mere few hours before we were all to converge on the lodge.

When I read the email the second time I was both happy that something was being done but also annoyed that this could cause more issues and work for me in the near future. And while I don’t like to miss moments like this and evenings at the lodge in general I am actually glad that I wasn’t feeling well yesterday and that I opened the email with the intent of informing the brother who sent it that I would not be in attendance. After an uncomfortable night it is now time to wait and try to put the pieces together through a variety of phone calls and conversations. Hopefully, this goes smoother than similar situations in the past.

Prayers, Candles, and Presents

A couple of nights ago we started Hanukkah a little early. Over the last month we had bought a few too many toys for our son so we figured we would begin part of the evening routine a couple of days prior. He didn’t really know what to make of it but he was happy with what we got him and seeing that smile made the few extra dollars seem like the bargain of the century. After all, this is his first Hanukkah and we want to make it a little more special so we have tried to make it as fun as possible while setting the ground work for a new holiday tradition.

We are starting this tradition as a family… just the three of us this year. Throughout the weekend, my wife and I made enough brisket to last for the eight nights and we made sure, beginning tonight, to light the candles with the proper blessings. It is only after the candles are lit, which our son seems to enjoy in and of itself, when we go back into the office closet and pull out the next toy for our son to play with. Reading the transliteration in front of our son know that, at one point I could read the Hebrew, reignited my desire to learn this beautiful language.

There is something calming about slowing down for a few moments, reading the prayers, and carefully lighting each candle. It really allows all three of us to just be in the moment while we enjoy our faith as a family. This followed by the happiness in our son’s face as he played with the toys (and the boxes that they came in) are really what makes this a special time of year and I look forward to sharing with him more and more about the holiday and the significance that it holds.

Of course, there is also another fun part of the evening as I was able to hide the small gifts that I have been accumulating over the past several weeks from my wife. Well, most of them are small. While the vast majority were clearance finds or daily deals, I was also able to find something that I had been meaning to get for her for some time now. Thankfully the camera that I was looking at went on sale and I was able to stay within budget. So now, each night, we will have images to accompany our memories and, most importantly, I might have made up, at least a little bit, for my mistakes during her birthday.

And now, with the candles having long since faded, and my wife and son sleeping, I am sitting here writing this and looking forward to the rest of the Hanukkah holiday. I am so glad that we are able to have this experience throughout the week and I can’t wait to see the smiles every evening. And, just think, it only gets better from here.

TMI Tuesday: Rolling

For the past couple of months our son has been rolling over when he feels like it. These moments were usually reserved for the times when we would try to get him to do tummy time… something that he is definitely not fond of. Basically, he wants to be doing just about anything else rather than spend time looking at the ground… although a game of mirror peek-a-boo will usually stave off his escape attempts.  

Up until recently he was limited by front to back (also known as the escape plan)… that was before he started teetering on the edge by sleeping on his side. He is usually pretty good about keeping a leg or arm out as a means to stop himself from rolling too far but there have been moments when he forgot to deploy one of these kickstands. A couple of weeks ago he got a little surprise when he accidentally turned a too much in the crib and ended up on his belly.

We thought that this would cause some level of hysteria but it was actually a pretty calm “oh crap” kind of reaction when it happened. You could kind of see him thinking about how he did it, what he could have done to prevent it, and the fact that maybe it isn’t too bad being on his belly when it is his choice. You would think that he would want to practice this but he is back to only doing it when the mood strikes him. Even when we put him on his tummy he still tends to want mommy or daddy to pick him up rather than attempting to roll over.

With that said, it is pretty fun playing with him on the floor and helping him roll from back to front and front to back with very little effort on my part. It should be pretty interesting when the time comes when he rolls a little too fast and ends up in the same position in which he started. I wonder what kind of look will be on his face after that happens for the first time. While there is a chance that he could start crying I am thinking he will just smile and give me a look seemingly asking me “Daddy, how the heck did I do that?” And, of course, no matter which one is his initial reaction, he will probably want to do it again… but only when he feels like it.

The Gifts Keep Coming

It felt like this for a while. 

During the course of the year we have received countless gifts from friends, family, and coworkers for our son. Having now lived through this, I can say that this is the time in life when you see the greatest amount of generosity. The first couple of months of the year saw the greatest deluge of packages and envelopes, but there is still a light trickle of gifts even as we head into the fall. It is pretty amazing the amount of items we have received over the months and we continue to be thankful for each and every item that we receive (even the ones that we return or exchange).

Admittedly, it can be a little daunting at times with the amount of stuff that has accumulated in our house but, in the end, it is all stuff that we have had to purchase anyway. It is interesting to think about the number of things and boxes that we originally moved into the apartment four years ago, the increased amount of stuff that we moved from the apartment to our current house, and the volume that will have to be packed and moved to our next home. And I am sure that the accumulation won’t stop there either.

I wish that I was as thoughtful as many of the people that we have in our life. Time and again, I have been presented with the same or similar opportunities and for one reason or another (usually finances or forgetfulness) too long a time passes and the opportunity is gone. I certainly have to get better at this as it is also a time to pay it forward and show the same generosity that has been shown to us. Hopefully there are many more opportunities coming up.

Sometimes I forget about just how great many of the people in our life are and this experience has been a clear reminder of quality of people that we have in our life. And don’t get me wrong, it is not about the numbers. Some of the greatest (and many time most useful) items have been the small thoughtful things that served us well during this learning process. Sometimes it wasn’t even a gift. There have been many times when the help or a willing ear have meant a great deal when we needed them. The gifts have only proven even more how much others car about us and our son. That is what it is all about and that is what we try to convey to our son each and every day.

Shifting And Adjusting

The past week has been rather interesting regarding the phone calls that I have received. It began last week with a call from a trustee regarding one of the utility bills that we recently paid. It was just a matter of double checking that everything was taken care of and, honestly, I appreciate the personal interest that this brother, and many others like him, take in the lodge. They just want to see the lodge continue to grow and return to prominence… they have been and continue to be the gate keepers.

After a brief conversation I told him that I would double check and give the service provider a call just to make sure that everything was good to go. As soon as I hung up I immediately scrolled through my email, found the representative’s number, and gave her a call. As expected, everything was good so I thanked her for her time and got back to my usual work.

About 20 or 30 minutes later I got a call from an unfamiliar yet familiar number. I answered in my usual way and was surprised to hear the same voice on the other end of the line that I had just heard a half hour ago. I guess she really appreciated the call as it turns out that she did a little crunching of the numbers and was calling me back to offer a 40% reduction in our rate. Same exact service from the same company for 40% less… that was a no brainer. I like these kinds of calls.

The other phone call I received was on Monday morning as I was on my way to work (a little later than usual). With our Red Cross blood drive scheduled for October I was wondering when I would be receiving the materials. This call put a little kink in that planning as they are currently experiencing a ‘good problem’ in that there are more people wanting drives that weekend then they have staff. The call was simply to ask us if we could move our drive. I can’t answer that one on the spot so I had to agree to call her back… in the end, the drive is moving from October to December.

Not ideal but sometimes doing the right thing isn’t the most convenient. Actually, for me it works out well in that I will be able to support one of my fellow brothers on the day that the drive was originally scheduled… I was wondering how I could accomplish both that day. So, sometimes things work out for the best even if they aren’t exactly what you were planning to happen. Hopefully, this is the end of the interesting phone calls for a while… actually, never mind, I hope I get more calls about reducing rates. Those are easy calls.

TMI Tuesday: That Wasn’t A Fart!

There are times early in the evening when there is loud rumble coming from the baby monitor. It’s not so much surprising as it is impressive given the fact that our son only recently surpassed the ten pound mark. While some might be a little taken back and somewhat disgusted by these emanations the fact of the matter is that they are downright hilarious.

Usually before an eruption our son begins to squirm and make the occasional noise boarding on a cry. When this happens I turn the video on just to check in on him only to see two feet pointing straight up in the air, stomach tensed, and face scrunched. As soon as he unleashes the “Cracken”, his body relaxes and he goes back to sleep.

Of course, then there are the other times when our son stops whatever he is doing (which isn’t much at this point) and starts grunting and pushing to the point that his face becomes a deep red. At this point it is best to take cover. While most of the time it is nothing but air followed by a smirk there have been quite a few moments when the shrapnel tries blowing through whatever barrier stands in its way. While that part may not be funny the look of disbelief, shock, and relief on our son’s face makes us laugh every time.

And when I say blow through barriers I mean blow through barriers. While I am certain that our son could fit into a smaller diaper, his colon wants nothing to do with those limited boundaries. We have been forced to move up a couple of sizes already not because of things being too tight but because the diapers failed the containment test (aka the blowout test). That is probably the most pleasant way of describing the scene when you pick up your child in the morning only to find that he has painted his back up to his shoulder blades. Not a pleasant way to wake up but one of those times when you find yourself laughing all the way to the bathtub.

While the sound effects started early on (before we left the hospital), they have only grown over time in both potency and decibel level. However, there is a bright side to this whole explosive situation. We have now gotten to the point when I can sleep through the night knowing that I have plausible deniability when I wake up. He still has a long way to go but he is proving to be a quick study.

One Fast Month

It is hard to believe that a month has already passed since our son decided to surprise us. We had been planning for his anticipated arrival for many months but when he showed up we were taken off guard. Even if everything had gone according to plan I think we still would not have felt as if we were prepared. I guess that just comes with the territory.

Since that early February morning, things have been a little hectic to say the least. It has been both a challenge and a time of wonder watching him adapt to life outside of the womb. Each day there is something a little different. Sometimes it is a rather unpleasant surprise (hence the TMI Tuesday posts) while other times there are moments of awe when my son hears me come home from work and smiles.

The nights can sometimes be long (more so for my wife) and the days go by way too fast. I don’t know where the last month has gone. All the while we have done our best to adapt and get acquainted with the fact that our life is completely different and our priorities have changed significantly.

There have been moments when people have been tremendously helpful and there have been times when those people, contrary to their good intentions, have been quite the hindrance. All the while our son has be surprisingly understanding of all that is going on around him and, for the most part, has not unleashed a plethora of protesting cries. It is a steep learning curve which we sometimes struggle with but have, thus far, been able to keep up.

Now I find myself a lot left that I still have to learn, a stories that I look forward to sharing with my baby, and a schedule that still needs some tweaking. All of this tends to go out the window on a daily basis as our little boy wants nothing to do with schedules and plans. We are all trying to just take things as they come, coordinate the best we can, and see how each day and night plays out.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that I can’t look forward to the future so I am slowly forming my baby bucket list that began germinating not long after we found out that we were having a child. Some of the things are common events during development like hearing his first words, watching him crawl and walk for the first time, and enjoying the silence as he sleeps through the night. Other things are very specific like sharing our hobbies, our family history, and taking him to the places that we enjoy visiting.

This is just a quick overview of what I am jotting down here and there. Don’t be surprised if you read a post in the future about many of the things that I am looking forward to doing and sharing with him. But, for now, I am going to keep it simple and enjoy the wonders of the first month and these first memories that my wife and I have of our new life as a growing family.

I Lied For A Good Reason…

The past couple of weeks have been difficult for me. Not because of anything bad or some of the other things that I have previously written about, it has been difficult because nearly every time I spoke with my sister I had to lie to her. I usually call my sister once a week, sometimes more if there is something going on or being planned, and so I didn’t want to change that routine. However, it was not easy to find things to talk about when I was avoiding talking about any plans for this weekend… I think I even lied to her on her birthday.

From the beginning we knew it would be a challenge but when my brother-in-law said that he wanted to do this we all, without hesitation, agreed that we would do our best to pull it off. Given her long history of finding out any and all plans (or gossip) this was no small talk, especially considering how much my nephew likes to talk. But it was all worth it when we saw her get out of the car today completely surprised, and that is not easy, that we had pulled off a surprise birthday party. Like we would simply let her 40^th birthday come and go without throwing a party.

While for much of my life I didn’t really spend a lot of time talking and really getting to know her, as I have gotten older I have learned how great of a person my sister really is. I admire how much she has accomplished and, in certain instances, overcome. While there were times that I am certain weren’t easy she never gave up and always kept moving forward. At the same time, she was always there if we really needed her for anything. Again, I may have not been aware of it at the time but it is pretty darn clear in hind sight.

And it is great to see her turning 40 at this point in her life as the party itself says a lot not just about my sister but about my brother-in-law as well. The two of them, while it took a while, were made for one another and even though my sister is a pain in his butt back, you can tell that he wouldn’t have it any other way. For how much they both do for everyone else, pulling off this celebration is the least that we could do and I am happy that we could play some, albeit very small, role in pulling it off.