Sunday Search: Another Reunion!

The family will understand the significance of this photo. 

While we have been planning this weekend for months we have been thinking about it for even longer. Ever since our son was born (especially given the circumstances around his birth) my wife and I have made a conscious effort to preserve our respective family histories that we can one day pass down all of this information to him. Part of this process is making sure that we attend the family reunions whenever we are given the opportunity to do so. Today, and this entire weekend for that matter, we were finally able to introduce our son to my mother-in-law’s side of the family up in New York.

While we have been sharing meals with various family members for the entire weekend, it was nice to have a larger group together for a short time so that we could learn a little more about the family, the different branches, and also the place where many of the roots still thrive. Much like the family reunion last summer, there were people we knew, some we recognized, and others to whom I was introduced for the first time. It was also a great way to introduce our son to an entirely new culture as these family members represented our son’s Italian and New York heritage.

After all, the stories are there, you just have to be there to listen. And when many of the family members weren’t playing with our son they would share their memories with us bringing to the fore both the rawness of recent memory but also appreciation of the time we did have with them. There really isn’t a way to describe that particular experience and that mix of emotions but, in the end, I am glad that we were there and that we are able to provide a connection to this part of the family not just for my wife and I but for our son.

Most importantly, while this was simply another reunion or gathering for some present, it was a means to connect with family for us. Family that shared stories with us that can’t be found in any book but that speak to the character of the family into which I was, once again, warmly welcomed. It was an afternoon and weekend that we will not soon forget and an experience we look forward to sharing with our son many more times in the future. However, next time I just have to remember to not eat for about three weeks prior.

The Family Masonic Bible

There have been countless times when I have been sitting at my desk in the lodge room looking up and down the sidelines wondering where my grandfather used to sit during meetings. It is a connection that I have with my grandfather despite never having the chance of getting to know him while growing up. Lodge is something that we have in common and I am always reminded of that when I see his ring on my finder and, now, when I look at the family Bible which I have been using recently for my genealogy research.

When I was raised just over three years ago, my mom pulled me aside and handed me my grandfather’s Masonic ring. She knew that I would appreciate and take care of it. She also knew that I was one of the few people in the family who would actually use it as there are not many masons in my family. The ring meant a lot to my grandfather, it means a lot to my mom, and it certainly means a lot to me. Now, just over three years later, my mom again pulled me aside and told me that she wanted to give me my grandfather’s Masonic Bible. The ironic thing is that my grandfather was presented his Bible just over three years after being raised and now I am being presented with that same bible just over three years since I was raised.

Not only was this the Bible presented to him by his lodge but it has also served as the family Bible with my grandparent’s marriage having been recorded in its pages and my grandmother having recorded many of the births and deaths throughout her life. Between the covers there are names across many generations from the death of my great great grandfather all the way through the birth of my niece... my name can be found in these pages too. All written in my grandmother’s hand.

I remember seeing my grandmother with the blue binding on her lap flipping through the book and pulling out the papers tucked between the pages. This became a more and more regular occurrence toward the end of her life. It was also one of the few things that my mom wanted to hold on to after my grandmother passed away. I know how much this Bible meant to my grandmother and I know how much it means to my mom. I am being entrusted with its safe keeping and it is not something I take lightly. After all, this is not just an item that resonates with me as a mason, it is a connection to my grandfather, my grandmother, and my mom.

TMI Tuesday: Who Knew Cleaning Was So Much Fun

Our Son's New Toy!

My wife and I entered the childcare search with a little trepidation not really knowing how to approach the process. We have already found a great daycare in the area but there are times when we would like to get out for the evening or have someone at the house when either the daycare is closed or when our son is home sick. While we know that our family is there whenever we need them, we can’t expect them to make the long drive out to us all of the time. We also have a number of people that we know in closer proximity but that is where the allergy part of the equation comes into play… our home needs to remain free of cats (and their dander), nuts, and shellfish.

In the responses that we received through Care.com there were a number of them that pretty much disqualified themselves simply in how they responded to our posting. Some didn’t bother reading what we had written (to the point of addressing their communication to some other name entirely), others had no business in childcare, a few wanted us to pay them for dropping our son off at their house, and others touted their love of animals of all kinds (see the first noted disqualifier). As for the other, thankfully, my wife’s background has been tremendously helpful in weeding out some of the “candidates”.

It took some time but finally we came across someone with a background that we were looking for, the clearances we were requiring, and a personality that matched well with our family. Despite our son’s grumpy sleepiness, this initial impression was proven correct when we met with her last week. As a bonus, she was also willing to take on the chore of cleaning our home on a weekly basis eliminating our need to conduct a second search. Sometimes things seem to just fall into place.

Not wanting to waste any time, and also wanting to get a handle on the cleaning, we had her start this past weekend to see how she would interact without our son and how our son would interact with her. After only a few minutes it was as if they had known one another all along and our son even “helped” her clean a little following close behind with a duster double checking her work and pushing his “vacuum” back and forth across the play room taking care all of the spots she missed. More importantly, he was comfortable having her around and the two of them played and read together for much of the morning which allowed my wife and I to take care of some organizing around the kitchen.

It took some time to find someone but sometimes you have to wait for the right opportunity to come about to find that perfect fit for your family. Fortunately, I also had a copy of his baby book on hand to get her up to speed! Looks like things may work out and we should have some time for ourselves moving forward and a clean house every week which will allow us to spend more quality time with our little boy on the weekends. And that is well worth the extra expense of having someone come in once a week.

A means to get the care giver up to speed!

Good Enough For Today

This is always an interesting time of year. It doesn’t really matter where you are or what you do for a living, you quickly find out who around you has even a trace of Irish ancestry. And, of course, you also find out who are the ones that see this as an opportunistic excuse to show up to work the following morning with soft voices, light shuffling feet, and sunglasses nearly implanted on their face. It really is an interesting day on the calendar to both experience and to observe (in more ways than one).

Until recently, it was never really a day that caught my attention. There were year when it even passed by without me knowing. Now having a better grasp and understanding of my own family history, I enjoy seeing the festivities and hearing the multitudes of stories of the places from which families originated. Given the long history and pride that is found in Irish families, it is no surprise to find my family’s original surname, McKenna, listed on Wikipedia:

McKenna, also MacKenna, Mckenna or Mackenna, is the anglicized form of the Gaelic Irish surname "Mac Cionaoith", also spelt Mac Cionaodha or Mac Cionnaith, meaning "son of Cionnaith.

The historical lineage of the McKennas lies in Trough, County Monaghan, Ulster, Ireland, where they were "The Lords Of Truagh" and the McKenna coat of arms can be seen on many of the graves from members of the family.

In North Kerry Mckenna is considered to come from Mac Ginea. The Cionnath, Cionaoith, Cionaddha forms are considered there to be sources of names like Kenny, Kenney and Kennedy.

It is fascinating to see the original family surname so closely tied to a specific geographic location in Ireland. This is particularly important given the limited details that we have about my family’s original Irish ancestor whom we believe was named William and who arrived in the United States sometime between 1840 and 1860. We don’t know exactly when or where he came into this country or precisely from where he came but we at least have some idea from which part of the country the family originated.

While this is the most recent immigrant on either side of my family, it is proving to be one of the more difficult to pin down both due to the discrimination of the Irish at that point in history and also the sheer fact that the name is so incredibly common. But, on this day it really doesn’t matter all that much. We know that we have Irish blood and from where our family hails. Today, and most days, that is enough. But it would be nice to know a little bit more.

Sunday Search: Land

The photo above is the barn on the original homestead for the Teaford family on Kerr's Creek, Virginia.  

Land is an important part of family history. It gives us the connection to previous generations, decades, centuries, and sometimes millennia after the lives of our ancestors. Knowing where we come from and finding those roots has always been something that has been of particular interest to me. This is part of what has driven me in recent years to find that land of our own where my wife and I can raise our family… and actual place, a piece of this earth, that we own. This was also important to the first generation of my family in the late 18^th century.

From Nellie Teaford Wood’s book which is included on the family website:

In 1780 Jacob Düfford bought his first farm in Augusta County at the foot of Sugar Loaf Mountain, a small round hill on property now part of Silverbrook Farms. With his wife Christenah and six children he came from Shenandoah County, where he had resided since 1774 on land in the Fairfax Grant.

Düfford had arrived in Philadelphia on the ship Hero on 27 October 1764, but his origin has eluded researchers. That he spoke and read and wrote German is established by his signatures in Philadelphia and in October 1792 in Virginia. He joined 193 residents in petitioning the Virginia General Assembly, citing their unacquaintance with the English "language" to publish laws in German so that "they may more cheerfully comply" because they have "always contributed their part of the support of government."

Virginia State claims show that he, along with other "Augusta Germans," did his part by furnishing flour for the Revolutionary army in 1780. 

…

The immigrant Jacob died intestate in 1801, owning three farms. The papers settling the estate in Augusta County Courthouse offer a wealth of genealogical and historical information. 

We didn’t have much when came to this country, colony actually, but we worked and slowly accumulated land. This was particularly important during this time in history as only landowners could vote and have any say in such petitions as the one to which he affixed his name in 1792. In the end, over the course of his life, Jacob had acquired over 200 acres in Augusta County. Makes my nearly 3 acres, purchased 235 years after Jacob bought his first farm, seem almost inconsequential in comparison.

In the years since that first generation, the family has seen land come and go in the family but those original farms, while not in the family, still exist. They still remain as a connection to our past regardless of who currently holds the deed. Being able to go down to Virginia, gather with those who have this same connection, and enjoy the area where we know our family has been for hundreds of years is something that we were able to enjoy over the summer and an experience I look forward to revisiting many times over in the future.

Slowing Down In Colonial Williamsburg

On Thursday we drove across Virginia following the James River (via the highway) from the mountains to the coast (at least near the coast). We arrived at the Williamsburg Lodge late in the afternoon, unloaded the car, and made our way (albeit a little slower than previous days) into Revolutionary City for the evening. A little weary from our travels, I didn’t take many pictures that night. At least none that are worth posting. It was a temporary mental block as I wasn’t even conscious of the camera strapped across my chest for much of the evening.

However, with season passes in hand (an extra bonus included with our rooms), a good night sleep behind us, and an over the top complimentary breakfast in our bellies, we spend the next day and a half exploring the living history that is Colonial Williamsburg. In addition to the numerous old…

…and new shops…

…lining the streets there we also numerous places where we were able to learn a little bit about colonial life.

One of those I wrote about yesterday but there were also other locations were people specialized in woodworking and brick making.

Of course, being a tourist destination, there were also other amenities available to us including a spa across the street from the lodge where I sent my mom and my wife during our last morning in town. Although modern, the structures still seemed to fit in.

However, the majority of our time was spent walking around enjoying the lacework of picket fences... 

...the flowering summer gardens…

...open spaces...

…trees…

…and the interplay between nature and architecture.

Anyone who has been here before, and it has been a long time since I last walked these streets (at least two decades), knows that there is always something going on, there is always some kind of event or activity taking place. This times around, especially given the heat and humidity, we simply wanted to enjoy our time there and soak in the atmosphere. It was a nice change from the packed schedule earlier in the week which allowed us to take our time, look around, and watch as the air cleared…

…the street lights turn on…

…and the sky slowly change from blue and white…

…to orange reflecting off the wood houses…

…to the amber and gold blanket welcoming the warmth of the night.

We couldn’t have asked for a better way to end our only complete day at Colonial Williamsburg and, while not as interesting as our previous activities, it was a much needed respite from the constant activity. At this point, with one more night and a long drive remaining, we are all looking forward to our final stop of the vacation. With that said, there are a lot of things that I wasn’t able to see that will certainly keep me from waiting such a long time before our next visit. Given the ties to our family history, maybe we will even add Yorktown and Jamestown in the future.

Sometimes You Can Feel A Place

 

The winding roads through the mountains and into Amherst County gave me the time to reflect on both all that we have seen thus far in our trip and also prepare for our next experience at the Monacan Indian Museum. I had called the museum during our drive through Lynchburg earlier in the morning so they knew that we were on our way… the most recent, as it turns out when looking at the sign in log, of a long list of family members that made the drive over the past week. Driving up to the small collection of buildings on Bear Mountain I could feel the connection with the place and the people there… it really is an indescribable feeling.

We were greeted warmly upon our arrival and after paying the modest admission fee we were shown to the next room where we watched a brief video about the history of our people. Given her recent passing, hearing Chief Sharon Bryant’s voice was both soothing knowing that her legacy lives on and also heartbreaking knowing all that she would have been able to accomplish if given more time. For those of you who have yet to view the video I have included it below and I encourage you to watch.

Upon the conclusion of the movie, we all got up and walked into the next room to learn as much as we could during our visit. Holding my son as I walked in, I was motivated even more to find the documents and information needed to become a member of the Monacan Nation. While looking around I was able to find a few more pieces of information for my research and I was able to speak with the woman who originally greeted us about what needed to be done (again, more about that later). Here are some of the pictured some the small but significant museum.
 

 

 

Even though the museum only consisted of three rooms we spent well over an hour looking around, talking, and learning about this part of our family history and heritage. After making sure it was okay to walk around and take pictures, we went next door to the Indian Mission School.
 

Given the years that it was used there is a good possibility that there were a few ancestors that received their education within those walls. It is amazing to think that the school was used until the 1960’s.
 

From within that small school house, one can look out the window and see the Episcopal Church just across a small creek.
 

A central part of the community, we walked over to the church to take a closer look…
 

…and when we turned the corner and approached the front entrance, a kaleidoscope of butterflies floated across the bridge laced clearing between the buildings…

 

…and converged on the flowering bushed in front of us.

 

As we walked away, the butterflies scattered into the wind. I am not usually one to think along these lines but I felt at that moment that was the way our ancestors were welcoming us back. It didn’t look or feel as though it was just a coincidence.  

Feeling both drained and energized, we got back in the car and drove up the road to another place I had only seen in pictures. Thankfully, we noticed the small sign along the side of the road and just a few minutes later I found myself standing in front of the final resting place for many of my ancestors. Within the lines of the single headstone at the front of the cemetery, many of my family surnames can be found… Redcross, Terry, Beverly, and Johns.

 

Behind this headstone are the graves marked with anonymous stones. All recognized as individuals but buried as a people.

 

It was the most moving part of the journey and gave me a lot to think about as we drove back through the mountains. Hopefully the next time I am able to visit will be as a member of the tribe and not just as a visitor.

Our Family Was Here

Family from all over showed up for the reunion. 

I can’t say I have ever been one for big Independence Day celebrations. I have watched the fireworks from a variety of vantage points from the comfort of the living room on the television screen, in Philadelphia, at the New Jersey shore, at my Aunt and Uncle’s house, and while lying on the grass in my BDUs in central Missouri. However, while the temporary bright lights in the sky were never something that really interested me a lot, the day has always had tremendous meaning. While I didn’t quite understand it early in life, there was still always something a little different about the day.

Of course, now I have a much more complete understanding of what makes this day such a big part of who I am. And I am not talking about the reasons that this day is important to us all, I am talking about the connection that I have, that my family has, to this day and what generations have done since to defend this country. And with those thoughts fresh in my mind, it was particularly special to celebrate this holiday with family, with the whole family, as we gathered together this weekend in Virginia.

And when I say the whole family I really mean it. This is a little different than what usually comes to mind when someone mentions a family reunion. This is not simply the immediate members that you see here and there, this particular reunion brings together all those who can trace back their genealogy to our original immigrant ancestor, Jacob Duffordt, who arrived at the Port of Philadelphia aboard the Hero on the 27th of October 1764. There are thousands in our tree with a small sampling making the trip this year to the mountains of Virginia.

As you can tell by the date, we were here before the revolution and beginning with the simple act of Jacob Duffordt selling supplies to the Continental Army, we have taken an active role in supporting and defending this country. From Jacob Duffordt during the Revolution, to his grandson during the War of 1812, countless relatives during the Civil War, my grandfather and his siblings during World War II, my father in Vietnam, and others in the family who have served more recently. All have given of themselves to ensure that this holiday remains as a day to be celebrated.

Celebrating this day with family, with multiple generations, in a place near where we originally settled is what this holiday is about for me. This was about as close to a perfect representation of the holiday that I can recall and one that I hope to relive many times over in the future. This is our holiday, part of our history, and a reminder of all the generations that came before us and the ones that still lay ahead. We have to remember our history and continue to pass on what we have learned and the experiences we have had so that future generations can look back on this day and experience the same connection.

Four generations!

Help From Brothers And Family Members

I can see the end to the chaos but it is still a few days away. Thankfully, I have had the help of brothers and family along the way. Together we kept things on track and everything moving forward as scheduled. Thankfully I got a new phone which has been holding up well (with plenty of battery left at the end of the day) to the barrage of calls and text that I have been fielding and the offers to assist have been nonstop over the past several weeks.

With the Worshipful Master slowly recovering and gradually taking things back over and stepping in where and when he can, it has been nice to be able to catch up on a few other items. At the same time, I have spoken with the District Deputy Grand Master a couple of times who has taken the time out of his schedule to make sure that we had everything ready for the next meeting. He has done this both for the meeting last week and he did the same thing earlier this week to make sure everything has been taken care of for the official visitation on Thursday.

Last night a lot of those things came together both in person and over the phone. One brother I was able to call for help also happens to be my cousin. We needed a few shirts made (embroidered) both with a specific budget in mind and a pretty short deadline of approximately a week. No surprise, he came through and last night I was able to see the excellent shirts that he made for us… definitely worthy of presenting during the meeting tomorrow night.

It was during this time with my cousin that I was once again reminded of an important aspect of freemasonry in that is does help bind a family together. The connection that I have with my uncle, a fellow mason, I also felt at that moment with my cousin. It was nice to both talk about our lodges and also show him around my lodge which he had never been to in his 20+ years as a mason (just a few more years than I have been a member).

Hopefully, I will be able to sit in lodge with both of them in the near future. There are a few meetings coming up and I am going to do what I can to make it happen (more schedule shuffling to come). But, until then, I am going to keep pushing forward and doing whatever I can to assist in the continued success of the lodge. There are a lot of things to look forward to in the coming months and all of them are going to require some effort. Effort that is well worth it!

First Night At Eastern Star

Last night my wife and I attended our first Eastern Star meeting in Norristown. It was quite the interesting night for the two of us and one that was very different to was we are used to. Even for me, who is used to the rituals and structure of a Masonic meeting, what I witnessed last night was completely different in many ways.

 The most glaring difference is that of the clear religious overtones (not undertones). From different songs sung to other obvious symbols, it is a little contrary to the non-religious, agnostic may be a more appropriate term here, stance that is held regarding the consideration of members, although a belief in G-d is required to join. It leaves someone like myself, who is not Christian but who is very familiar with Christianity, a little confused as to the true direction.

However, like many things in this country that have significant Christian overtones, one needs to consider the spirit of the message rather than the references made. Additionally, when looking at many of the other aspects of the ritual and the general set up and structure of the meeting there are numerous Jewish references, symbols, and undercurrents in the order. Most glaringly is the fact that we face the East toward the temple mount and Jerusalem (this is a commonality found throughout Freemasonry).

Overall, what is more important in the fraternity is the fact that you are surrounded by, in this instance, many brothers and sisters who show genuine interest in who we are and take the time to talk with us, learn more about us, and, when needed, assist us in whatever way they can. What is all too often overlooked is the fact that family is the foundation to our fraternal organizations… a family with G-d as the head. This is the bond that we all have experienced and what strengthens our connection with one another and our belief in our own G-d (based on our individual faith).  

It was this connection with those around us that we experienced both before and after the meeting and all the rituals, routines, and references therein. It is the conversation and the light that you can see in their eyes, regardless of age, that slight glow that lets you know just how happy they are to meet you and to share this common connection with you. That is what is at the heart of chapter which makes all the references and overtones, for me, window dressing.

I Now Have Sisters Too…

This morning my wife and I were off to Franconia for something that has been on our schedules for some time now. After a very tasty breakfast surrounded by quickly made friends and those whom we have had the chance to get to know prior to the day. While I have been through similar events over the past year this was the first time that my wife has been through such an experience. Today my wife and I were inducted into the Order of the Eastern Star (OES).

Heading into the ceremony I wasn’t sure how my wife was going to react. More accurately, I wasn’t sure what kind of experience she was going to have. While I knew the broad strokes of what was going to happen it is such a personal reaction that it is hard to judge how people will react.

It is interesting, OES has many more Christian overtones than what I have experienced in Masonry thus far. Honestly, I wasn’t sure how I was going to react but framed the way that they are, as virtuous examples, I am fine with the way that things are handled. While it will never be a bastion for local Jewry, it is a group of faithful brothers and sisters who believe in G-d and respect the difference in beliefs that each of us carry in our hearts and minds.

Every once in a while, throughout the morning and early afternoon, I would look at my wife just to see how she was doing. A little bit to my surprise, she seemed fine the entire time. No moments of fear or panic, there was even a bit of comfort and relief that seemed to pass over he over the final few minutes of the induction. Similar, not the same but similar, to my time in lodge there was a sense of welcome and comfort that I felt and, as it turns out, my wife felt during the meeting.

This was particularly impressive considering we were the center of attention at the OES Regional Meeting where many brothers and sisters were focused on our every word and action. I am very proud of my wife for pushing herself and going through with the induction. It was something that I am glad we were able to do together and both forget about work for just a small portion of our week.

This was also an occasion that made me appreciate even more the time that I spend with my brothers at the lodge and the connection I have with the fraternity. I hope that my wife is able to develop that same connection but that is up to here and takes time. In the meantime, I am simply going to look forward to our time together at our chapter every month.