Our Family Was Here

Family from all over showed up for the reunion. 

I can’t say I have ever been one for big Independence Day celebrations. I have watched the fireworks from a variety of vantage points from the comfort of the living room on the television screen, in Philadelphia, at the New Jersey shore, at my Aunt and Uncle’s house, and while lying on the grass in my BDUs in central Missouri. However, while the temporary bright lights in the sky were never something that really interested me a lot, the day has always had tremendous meaning. While I didn’t quite understand it early in life, there was still always something a little different about the day.

Of course, now I have a much more complete understanding of what makes this day such a big part of who I am. And I am not talking about the reasons that this day is important to us all, I am talking about the connection that I have, that my family has, to this day and what generations have done since to defend this country. And with those thoughts fresh in my mind, it was particularly special to celebrate this holiday with family, with the whole family, as we gathered together this weekend in Virginia.

And when I say the whole family I really mean it. This is a little different than what usually comes to mind when someone mentions a family reunion. This is not simply the immediate members that you see here and there, this particular reunion brings together all those who can trace back their genealogy to our original immigrant ancestor, Jacob Duffordt, who arrived at the Port of Philadelphia aboard the Hero on the 27th of October 1764. There are thousands in our tree with a small sampling making the trip this year to the mountains of Virginia.

As you can tell by the date, we were here before the revolution and beginning with the simple act of Jacob Duffordt selling supplies to the Continental Army, we have taken an active role in supporting and defending this country. From Jacob Duffordt during the Revolution, to his grandson during the War of 1812, countless relatives during the Civil War, my grandfather and his siblings during World War II, my father in Vietnam, and others in the family who have served more recently. All have given of themselves to ensure that this holiday remains as a day to be celebrated.

Celebrating this day with family, with multiple generations, in a place near where we originally settled is what this holiday is about for me. This was about as close to a perfect representation of the holiday that I can recall and one that I hope to relive many times over in the future. This is our holiday, part of our history, and a reminder of all the generations that came before us and the ones that still lay ahead. We have to remember our history and continue to pass on what we have learned and the experiences we have had so that future generations can look back on this day and experience the same connection.

Four generations!

Military Ties Past and Present

Today I am not just thinking about those currently serving in the armed forces but I am also thinking about all those with whom I have crossed paths with in my life, my family members who served, and my ancestors who wore a uniform. When I stop for a moment to reflect on all of these people it is amazing to think about how extensive that list is. And that list only gets longer when I consider those I shared a barracks with in the summer of 2002 and those I only knew in passing while at Norwich prior to my time in basic training.

When I think of my family my thoughts first turn to my father, my grandfather, and my great grandfather. I know a little about each of their times in the military and the rest I have done my best to put the pieces together. My father served in the Army during Vietnam, my grandfather in the Navy during World War II, and my great grandfather served in the Army during The Great War. These are only three men without whom I wouldn’t be the person I am today for a myriad of reasons.

When I look further back in the family and across the many branches, all branches of the military are represented including my uncle on my mom’s side who served in the Coast Guard, my uncle and great uncle on my dad’s side who served in the Air Force, and my great Aunts who enlisted in the Marine Corps during World War II. All branches represented throughout the course of history from the French-Indian Wars to the present day with several cousins still under contract with the government. It really is quite the extensive history.

While the family stories are things which come up on occasion (and there are some good ones), I hear a story or two at least once a month from many of the brothers at the lodge. These men represent over 75 years of military history from both peace time and times of war with many of them sharing vivid accounts of their service when the moment calls for their wisdom. It really is an interesting mix of experiences that have been shared before and after meetings.

Of course, there are the men with whom I attempted to serve. Some I remember vividly while others remain nameless in my memory. I have lost track of nearly all of them with only a single connection remaining to that brief time in Missouri. I regularly wonder about what happened to many and I think about what might have been the result had I completed training along with the rest of the “House of Pain”.

I am grateful to all these men and women that have served as well as those to whom I have no personal connection and I encourage you to think about the connections that you have to the various branches of the military. You may be surprised as well to find so many links to the branches that have safeguarded our country. Not everyone serves but we all benefit from the service of those who have honorably donned the uniform.

Put Down Your Hot Dog For A Second!

Today is Memorial Day, a day that we remember the men and women who lost their lives to ensure our safety as well as our way of life. This is something that we should all be conscious of on a daily basis but sadly we forget. This is a day for us to refocus and appreciate what we have.

Just as I remember the fallen on Veterans Day, for me, Memorial Day is also a day to remember those who could have easily been one of the memorialized. Those who were saved by being a day late or a day early, those who were born a year prior or a year after, and especially those who were sitting a foot to the left or a foot to the right. These people could have easily been etched on the monuments of the fallen. These people need to be remembered and honored not just for their own service but as the keepers of memory… the brothers and sisters in arms who bear the burden of survival and wrestle with the pain of memory. This is also the reason why we should remember the brave lives that were lost somewhere else besides the battlefield.

I consider myself fortunate that there have only been a few in the many generations of my family, from the Revolutionary War to the present, which have lost their lives fighting for this country. However, there have been countless generations who have struggled with their own memories and many who have had to carry the guilt of life.

For this reason, I take this time to not only remember the sacrifices of the fallen but also offer my undying gratitude to all those who have served and could have easily been a second too late or early. Thank you!