I came to the realization tonight that I time has passed much too quickly for my liking. It used to be when I watched television shows that the characters were portraying the life that was ahead of me (in some parallel universe) but now I watch the same kinds of shows and they are my age. Or, more accurately, I am their age. Now it truly has become a means of looking into parallel lives.
However, unlike the past. I watch not in want of anything that they have but with an appreciation for the path I have taken and where I am now. There are certainly directions that could have proven more advantageous in various ways, particularly financially, not I don’t know if I would necessarily be better off. It is possible that could be the case but I am happy with where I am wand what I have right here, right now.
There are little things that I need to work on to improve myself but everyone has things that they either want to change or improve. There are times that I wish I had gotten more done or produced more work but I don’t know if that still would have led me to this moment, writing these words. There are a lot of moments where things could have been different but a lot of subsequent moments that could have been lost if things didn’t happen exactly as they have happened in my life.
And while I watch the television shows and the live depicted on the screen it is entertaining to see how my generation has developed and how much it has changed over the years. I think I may finally be comfortable with my generation. Well maybe not all of them but at least some of them. There is still a certain disconnection I feel with my peers but the chasm is not nearly as vast as it was five or ten years ago.
Of course, that may not really be a generational thing. Maybe it is just a matter of being different, about not fitting in with any particular group or population. While I have always been more of a critical, some would say mathematical, thinker I have always embraced the arts and thrived in a creative environment. I have always had the two sides of my brain functioning, and sometimes fighting, at the same time forcing me to embrace and reject certain generational characteristics.