Light Night And Heavy Emails

It was quite clear last night that we are indeed in the darkness of the sweltering summer months as there were only two of us who made it out to the lodge for fellowship. Given the travel that I have been hearing about from various brothers, it was not a complete surprise. Also, and I take responsibility for this one, there isn’t much in the way of communication during this season which leads some to simply forget. In reality, it was nice to have a relaxing evening to catch up with one of my brothers, reflect on our recent efforts, and look forward to the coming months of meetings, events, projects, and objectives.

There are a number of us who remain active throughout the year only taking breaks here and there. Lodge is something that we enjoy and that we want to see thrive during our lives in the lodge so we put forth the effort and do what we can, not just to make good men better but to make good lodges better. However, in my position, I have seen multiple instances (through email, social media, casual conversation, etc.) where brothers think that they are doing what is best for the fraternity but, in fact, they are doing everything to undermine freemasonry in general and our Grand Lodge in particular.

I am not one to name names in this instance, and I am not privy to those names in other instances, so let us simply say that there are many brothers out there that are not holding themselves to the same high moral standards of a mason that they should. They speak about brothers behind their backs and they hide behind fake names and Facebook pages that are, to put it nicely, and despicable disgrace. They seem to forget the traditions, rituals, rules, and standards by which we should hold ourselves and others in this fraternity.

While what is being said bothers me a great deal, it is the fact that they do not stand by their own words by attaching their name to their statements. This is hugely important to me as I hold myself to that basic standard when posting these blogs. If I can’t put my name to it, I don’t write it. Although I haven’t really had anything fall into the latter category. There is a time and place for everything and we all certainly have the right to our own opinion but we should also stand strong in our convictions and opinions. We must also remember the rules by which we live our lives and the moral standards by which we hold ourselves and others. We are here to make good men better, our lodge better, and the fraternity better. It is impossible to do so if we undermine all three as some brothers have chosen to do.

Family First

I left the office with plenty of time to get to the lodge and meet with a few of the brothers before the meeting. This is nothing out of the normal except this time I knew when I got in the car that I wasn’t going to be able to stay for long. Because of some other unavoidable occurrence the only thing that I had time for on Thursday night was to check the mail and hand everything off to my assistant for the night. It is an odd feeling every time that I have had to do this and especially since this is the first time that I would be missing multiple meetings in a single year. However, in the end, the brethren understand that family has to come first.

It is during these moments, above all others, that I am glad that I have an assistant that I can count on to take over and whom I trust with the various duties during the meeting. Each time that I have had to leave early for personal reasons I was able to hand everything off, run through the agenda, and get out the door to see to other obligations. At no time have I wondered if something was taken care of in my absences. The past couple of years in particular, knowing that I can count on this brother for the information that I need has been an invaluable resource and I greatly appreciate the assistance of my former mentee.

With that said, I have made it a point to follow up the following day to see what I missed and if there were any action items that I needed to address. More accurately, see what action items I needed to address. Each time that I have made that call I was given a clear rundown of what was accomplished the night before and what I can expect in the weeks to follow. This makes the following meeting that much easier.

I hate missing any night at the lodge but especially a stated meeting. But, as I stated above and as we all hold close to our hearts, family must come first and I have never received any push back for having to miss a meeting for this reason. And each time that I have made the decision to forego the evening gathering, especially this past meeting, I have been glad that I made the right decision. The brethren rely on me to assistance here and there for the tasks that fall under my purview and occasionally for general council but my family needs me during difficult times.

A More Complicated Petition

Well, it should be no surprise to anyone who read my post yesterday that I didn’t make it to the lode last night as I was recovering from my second serious car accident in the past ten days. However, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t been working on a few things for the lodge. In fact, I have been working on a rather interesting petition as of late that has been an ongoing project since the last stated meeting. While most petitions are pretty straightforward, this one in particular has had a number of details that have made it a great learning process both for the petitioner and also for me.

The situation is rather simple in that the candidate already petitioned another lodge which presented said petition at their last stated meeting. Following dinner last month at my lodge, he expressed a desire to join our lodge which is more convenient for a multitude of reasons. Following that meeting and after confirming his intentions, I circled back with the original lodge in possession of his petition. This is when things really got interesting as having not found myself in this position previously, I made sure to copy both District Deputy Grand Masters. After all, I always want to make sure that decisions such as this are by the book and as transparent as possible.  

Fast forward and I now find myself in a friendly back and forth trying to confirm many of the details of the process and double checking the conclusions with both my District Deputy Grand Master and the petitioner. It has been a process to say the least but it has also been a great learning experience and we will have a solution to the situation in short order now that the broad strokes have been taken care of. However, the most important thing that I have made sure not to lose sight of is the simple fact that a good man has shown a desire to become a mason.

In the end, it doesn’t really matter where he receives his degrees (although I have my preferences), the important things is that the fraternity is gaining a solid member. Too often lodges lose sight of this fact and focus on what is best for their lodge. While the betterment of your home lodge is hugely important, we can all agree on that fact, the growth of our fraternity, of Freemasonry as a whole, needs to take precedence. We have to keep in mind what is best for the brotherhood and for the man who desires to become a brother. If we do right by these two, things have a way of coming back to us both as a lodge and as a mason. We must do what is right.

Chasing Down Dues

Since the last time I was at the lodge, stemming from a conversation I had with one of the brothers, I pulled together a list of those brothers who have yet to pay their dues for the current year. I divided the disappointing list between myself and a few other brothers, all of whom are past Masters, with the hope that we could all reach out to those brothers specified for each of us and make sure that our fellow masons can avoid being suspended. Well, I can’t speak for anyone else but I started reaching out to the members of the lodge that I selected for myself beginning with those whom I am most familiar.

And it didn’t take long before I spoke with a brother who has had a bit of a rough time as of late. Unfortunately, I had lost touch with him over the past year but took it upon myself to reconnect with him via Facebook. While doing so I had the odd feeling that something must have happened since it had been a while since I had seen him at lodge. While he was clearly being too hard on himself, I continued to insist that he is welcomed at the lodge at any time and that we are here, I am here, should he need any assistance. After all, we are brothers.

Thankfully, after a lengthy conversation we agreed to see one another again at the lodge soon. And, despite my justified offer to remit his dues, he insisted on paying is own way. I give him credit, he had a few very trying moments in his life lately but he managed to push through them and hopefully we can bring him full circle and continue to make this good man even better.

Other discussions never even got off the ground as there have already been a few unsuccessful attempts to reach various brothers. For some their lack of dues seems to be a simple oversight while, for others, there may be a little bit of abuse of the system at play. I can’t say for certain unless I speak with them directly but their track records in the database don’t quite match up with someone facing a recent hardship. But, again, part of being a good mason is giving your brother the benefit of the doubt so I will have to wait and see.

In the end, we are a small lodge with unreasonably moderate dues so when brothers don’t pay it does hurt. It won’t make or break us but it would give us some additional breathing room in the coming year should everyone pay their own way. Heck, they should take note of my interaction above… I was ready to remit his dues on the spot but he wanted to put forth the effort and the finances to pay for himself. I tip my hat to you sir and look forward to meeting again at the lodge in the near future.

Last Notice Of The Year

For the first time in months I am actually on schedule… the final notice of the year is done and ready to be mailed. This is usually the hardest message for me to write or at least it has been these past two years as there is limited space to both reflect on the previous year while also looking forward to the following year. Of course, it also wouldn’t be an end of the year message if I didn’t include another appeal to pay dues.

The past year has been a bit trying but we managed to get through it and now we are entering the new year with a clean slate. Actually, with an almost completely new slate as I will be one of the few staying in my elected office. While there were times over the past twelve months when I questioned whether I even wanted to run for reelection it all came down to living up to the promise I made to myself and others to see this to the end. We are at a point of turning things around at the lodge. While we may fishtail a bit at times, we are still moving in the right direction.

It is with this at the forefront of my mind that I wrote my final message of the year to the brethren. It consisted of wrapping up the events for the year as well as a warm welcome to the incoming officers. While I will in some regards miss the routine that I have enjoyed over the past couple of years under the current leadership, I am also looking forward to the changes on the horizon and getting to know some of the other brothers a little better. This is one of the benefits of being Secretary that only those who have held the office can truly appreciate… you really get to know the people with whom you work and the bond that you have with them is something that is shared, for a brief moment in time, among the officers.

Having missed the final meeting of 2014 due to a medical emergency, I am interested to observe the transition first hand. My first time as a sitting officer and only my second time as a mason. And during this upcoming meeting I am looking forward to seeing the faces of those taking office for the first time. I remember the feeling well and I will never forget it. It truly is a time to remember and an experience that I look to share with some newly elected brothers.

TMI Tuesday: Baby Gets A Bigger Room

The long day began with our usual morning routine which quickly changed once we got in our cars and met up at our son’s daycare. Today we both wanted to be there when we dropped him off as things were going to be quite different when we picked him up. It was a great feeling telling him “You have fun at school, mommy and daddy are going to go get you a bigger room!” From that daycare we drove to another… we haven’t been very happy with where our son has been spending his days.

Our appointment began as the last of the children were dripped off by their parents and as soon as we had a moment to sit a look around, we knew that this was a completely different place than where our son was currently spending his time. By the end of the tour there wasn’t a question in our mind as to whether we wanted to change his daycare it was all a matter of when would he be able to start. While we were going to make the switch anyway the fact that it was a $100 per week cheaper made that decision a lot easier.

From there we drove up the road a few miles where we met with a brother from the lodge and his wife. It was a relatively quick meeting as we were all running quite a bit behind schedule and before we knew it we were up against the clock to get to our next appointment. We arrived slightly passed the time we had hoped to arrive but things seemed to work out as our room wasn’t quite ready. This gave us an opportunity to talk with all those who greeted us at the front door. At this point part of me was eager to get things moving while another part as nervous about the changes which were about to occur.

The delays seemed longer in the moment than they do in hindsight. I guess it was all the excitement and anticipation of the day. Looking back it seems like mere moments between the first handshakes to the final signature to the disbursement of checks. While all the leg work and preparations may have been time consuming, it was all worth the effort when we were handed the keys to our new home and our son’s bigger bedroom. Now we can finally call ourselves homeowners and now we have a place where we can see ourselves raising our family for many years to come. It is a great new feeling to have especially when you go to pick up your son and tell him that we found a place where he will grow up.

Thy Will Be Done!

Before our son was born my wife and I had the conversation that we should really consider getting a basic will put together. It is a subject that has come up from time over the past year but there was always something that would come up to take our attention away from what needed to be done. Finally, at the last stated meeting, I was able to pull one of the brothers aside, who happens to be an estate attorney, and got his contact information. Again, it was a very simple will that we were looking for but something that we now, finally, had the time and opportunity to complete.

The impetus for getting this done really had nothing to do with our financial situation or the possibility of us owning a home in the near future. The motivation was much simpler, we want to make sure, should anything happen to us, that our son would be taken care of by those people that we believe would raise him right and would have his best interests in mind. That is really what we wanted to legally put in place leaving no question as to where he would go and who would take care of him.

The process was actually much easier than we were anticipating as my masonic brother was able to pull everything together in less than a week following my email to him with all the information (names, addresses, special requests, etc.) that were required for these basic drafts. Actually, we had two wills drawn up, one for me and one for my wife. Each mirrored the other as we have been in agreement ass to the contents from the beginning. The only difference being that, motivated by previous discussions at the lodge, I specifically requested a masonic service.

Given how easy it was, the fantastic rate which we were charged, and the simple fact that this brother will go above and beyond to assist us and offer us advice, I have already recommended is services many times over to both friends and family. So now the next stop is to the safe deposit box so that we will not have to worry about misplacing the originals. And I must say that it feels great to have this important document now completed and the worry about what we hope will never happen has now substantially subsided. We are now at ease knowing that, should something happen, our son will be taken care of and will be raised the right way.

Light In The Dark Months

Throughout this past week I was doing my usual preparations for the stated meeting although the June meeting is a little different. Just like any job that you enjoy sometimes you just need a little break. This is time of year when we hope that the temperature isn’t too high outside and the meeting goes quickly. By June we are all itching for a little vacation.

The meeting on Thursday night was excellent. There were great proposals and others that we will continue discussing in the future… it is safe to say that we are all looking forward to a new kitchen. It was also a slightly more relaxed meeting as June meetings usually are. Finally, toward the end of the evening, I made the motion that everyone had been looking forward to… I made the motion to go dark until the September meeting.

However, there is still a lot of activity that will be taking place during the warmer months. In addition to the continued fellowship there are other meetings to attend, events to bring our families to, and plan that need to be finalized. And, for me, it is a time to catch up on the communications that have been slightly lacking and completing the tasks that will make the rest of the year much easier.

Of course, during this time we all have another job that needs to be done… the number of petitions this year has shrunk significantly from the previous year. We all know good men whom we see every day or on occasion. Now, during this down time, is the chance to talk with them about the fraternity and the opportunity that those good men have to be better.

This is also the time when I think back to the first time that I walked through the doors of the lodge. I had stopped by Grand Lodge the week prior and was subsequently introduced from one of the brothers from Ardmore. In between these meetings I had the chance to meet with my uncle, talk about the fraternity, and have him sign my petition.

It was a sweltering summer afternoon when I met with my future brother at the IHOP half a block down the street. We spent the better part of the lunchtime hours discussing my interest, motivations, and what I am looking to get out of becoming a mason. We also discussed his extensive experience. Our meeting then moved to the lodge where he walked me through many of the then foreign rooms before he took my petition and we went our separate ways.

Many months later I received my degrees but I will never forget that afternoon. That afternoon during the dark months of 2012. It is safe to say that these months aren’t truly dark when you can so easily find masonic light in the pages on the calendar. We may not be convening at the lodge for meetings over the summer but the fellowship, brotherhood, and commitment continues throughout the year.

Last Time, First Time

I headed into this weekend knowing that it was going to be a long one. Earlier in the week I had to make the decision regarding where I would be going and what I would be able to get done. In the end, there were a couple of things that required my attention and so my long Saturday began with me staggering out of bed around 6:30.

The first stop of the morning was at the lodge where I had to ensure that the Red Cross had enough time to set up for the Blood Drive which was scheduled to begin at 10. For those of you unfamiliar with the logistics, they usually begin unloading the truck between 8 and 830 in the morning. Thankfully the traffic was light so my slightly late departure had me arrive just as the truck was pulling up alongside the building.

I stayed at the lodge through most of the set up and left for my second commitment about an hour before donors were supposed to begin showing up. It was time to backtrack a bit and take care of some final things at my mother-in-law’s house. My wife and I arrived at about the same time and double checked what had to be moved out. Once my brother-in-law pulled up, the moving went quickly (the 4 larger items were much lighter than expected) and we were soon headed back to our house to unload everything.

Fortunately, the only items that my wife decided to take from the house are ones that have a practical use and that we were going to pick up at some point in the future anyway. Because of this, we had plenty of room and knew exactly where everything had to go. After offering a little compensation to my brother-in-law for his help, my wife and I took a few minutes to relax and plan the rest of the afternoon.

My wife and I agreed that she would join me in Ardmore giving me a bit of a head start so that he could take care of our son before leaving and so they didn’t have to spend too much time at the event. With our plans in place, I got back in the car and headed off to the lodge for the remainder of the blood drive. After a quick retrieval of the mail, I walked back through the doors and checked on the donor progress… the turnout wasn’t bad for a last minute arrangement and it soon got a little better as a brother walked into the hall and signed up.

While we were catching up on things, my wife arrived and seeing others laying on the tables decided, for the first time, to donate. Of course we had to double check first but given that she was well beyond the 6 week waiting period, she walked up and registered to donate. As it turns out, she was perfectly fine and somewhat surprised at how easy the whole process was from beginning to end.

So it was an interesting and busy day that came to an end with the lodge once again having been cleared out and my wife and I enjoying the weather by taking our son for a walk along Lancaster Avenue. And after a quick dinner with my parents at a local restaurant, we headed back home a little tired but having gotten a fair amount accomplished during the day. We all slept quite well last night and looked forward to a mostly open schedule for the rest of the weekend

Returning Home

This morning I woke up to the reassuring thought that tonight I would be home sleeping next to my wife and son. However, there was a long day ahead of me and a conference call that was about to start moments after I stumbled out of bed. During this postponed weekly call I couldn’t simply let the productive few morning moments pass me by so I used the time confined to my room to take care of a last blast of emails and packed my bag. With a few minutes to go I had everything ready and as soon as I hung up the phone I was out the door.

After returning the key cards to the front desk, I made my way across the street and walked through the Hilton on my way to the show shuttle. Before inspecting the line I swung through the gift shop in search of an item required for my return to the office tomorrow… a Chicago refrigerator magnet. It may seem odd but it had become tradition that each time we travel to a new place for work we pick up a magnet for the office fridge. We have put together quite the collection from across the country.

With the line for the shuttle painfully long which would have prevented me from making to the booth on time, I made the detour to the front of the building, hailed a cab, and was at the convention center with a little breathing room. Enough time to check my coat and bags and make my way to the booth before the first scheduled meeting of the day. I guess it is a good thing that I was busy this morning because it left me little time to think about getting back home to my family.

The morning flew by with a number of excellent conversations and introductions including an interesting discussion with a fellow brother that happened to be passing the booth. Immediately after lunch it was time to leave the floor and so I made my way, along with the CEO and his wife, back to the coat check and out to the sidewalk to catch the final cab of the trip. Thankfully the show was a success and the hard work that everyone put in paid off so the conversations during the 40 minute drive was of a great experience and looking forward to the show next year in Atlanta.

Everything went as smoothly as possible at the airport (unlike my departure on Sunday) and I found myself with a little extra time before the flight. With nothing else that needed to be done I found a little restaurant where I could sit down for a late lunch and called the office to give a little update and my wife to tell her how much I looked forward to getting back home. Before I knew it I was on the plane, propped up against the window, and fast asleep with my legs crumpled against my briefcase.

The flight landed on time with me waking up just before the wheels touched the ground. After a bit of a wait outside the baggage claim (for some reason we pulled into the international terminal) I was soon nested next to my son as my wife drove us away from the cluster of a pickup area. It was a great feeling to be home and finally reunited with my family. While I may have woken up in Chicago, I will be going to bed with my wife and son tonight. A perfect end to a business trip.

Brother Helping Brother

With a rather hectic day behind me I found myself trying to catch up and take care of those quick phone calls that seem to get lost in the minutes of the calendar. Having checked off a few of the things that I had fallen behind on I made one more call before I left the office. It had been well over a week since I placed the print over at Staples for the lodge and I haven’t heard anything from them. I am glad that I decided to pick up the phone as I was able to swing through Bryn Mawr and pick up everything that we needed to send the notice out this weekend (with the exception of the notice which will get done later this week).

With a fresh stockpile of dues cards, an address stamp, and newly retrieved mail in hand, I walked through the front door just as the Worshipful Master was heading out. After reviewing a few quick items (including the aforementioned dues cards which have a very minor change over the old stock), we circled up on a couple of things, shook hands, and parted for the evening. When I walked in I didn’t notice many brothers in the hall with the exception of a new mason putting together the announcement board in the corner. However, it was quite and I soon found myself finishing up a few items a little faster than usual and heading up to the lodge room to grab the embosser.

It was here where I found all the brothers that I thought would be at the lodge. Split into a couple of groups to work with new candidates, many of the recently raised brothers were instructing them on what they had just learned the previous week. Can’t say that I would have been able to do the same thing so soon after being raised. It really was something to behold as this was for them a normal part of being a mason. The fellowship that we have tried so hard to foster over the past year was slowly becoming part of what is expected from candidates and, therefore, new masons.

It was the epitome of brother helping brother. The room was mostly filled with those who have been masons for two years or less with a Past Master offering his wisdom and experience when needed. While I offered a few tips here and there to the new masons, I pretty much stood back and enjoyed being in the midst of such a drastic change over what we experienced last winter. While there are things that need to be done every week at the lodge, this is really what makes me look forward to driving to Ardmore every Tuesday night.

Unexpected Generosity

Yesterday started early as I had to make my way to Ollie’s to pick up the couch for which I had arranged transport yesterday. Since the E-Z Pass situation remained unresolved, I was running just a few minutes behind schedule (about the time it takes to pay and get change at the toll), but made it there only a couple minutes after my Masonic brother and his pickup truck. After a few passes through the aisles to put a few needed items in my cart, I made my way to check out, paid for the new selections, and had the three foot square box brought out to the curb. About 40 minutes later and everything was offloaded and in my office. All the while, my brother refused any and all kinds of compensation for his kindness.

Now that this task was done, my wife and I relaxed by unpacking a few more boxes before we headed out the door early in the afternoon. It was party time! Off we went to Bryn Mawr for another family holiday party where we could catch up with those we haven’t seen since the same time last year. Of course, this year was a little different as my wife walked through the doors in an obvious state.

What we found out when we arrived was that there was other news circulating around the house in that one cousin was also expecting and another just got engaged the previous week. It really was a time to celebrate all the good news which we both needed with everything else that is going on. So we made the rounds knowing what the introductory topic was going to be with each relative.

Later in the evening, while the grandmom shots were being poured and passed (this is what happens when you find an unopened bottle of Southern Comfort at the family party), my cousin (the one who is also my brother) walked up to me with a small box in hand. He had said in the past that he had something for me but I had honestly forgotten about it. As it turns out, I can now wear something representing both sides of my family at each lodge meeting… my grandfather’s ring (from my mom’s side) and cufflinks from my cousin (my dad’s side). While I have received many gifts this season sometimes it is the unexpected ones that really surprise you and appreciate the bonds that you have with family and brothers.

Reminded Of Grandpop

This is the ship my grandpop served on during WWII.

I never got to know my grandpop. He passed away only a few years after I was born so everything that I know about him is second hand. Over the past few years I have been uncovering pieces here and there about his life. From what I have been told he was, putting it nicely, a bit of a complex man but, in the end, knowing my father and my uncle he must have done something right.

The complexities began the day he was born. As I have been told by both my great aunt and others in the family, his name was the first unique thing about him. The day that my grandpop was born my great grandfather decided that the best place for him to be was at the bar. I guess in Appalachia you have to earn the nickname “White Lightening”. This did not sit well with my great grandmother so she took revenge by naming her son after a former boyfriend and the doctor who delivered the baby. That is how the name Percy Davis (first and middle names) got its start in my family.

Later in life, with no work to be found in Western Virginia, my grandpop was the one who moved the entire family to Pennsylvania. Not long after that he enlisted in the Navy during World War II and served on the USS Cole crossing the equator several times during his service. I was reminded of both of these aspects of his life as I was recording the brief life history written by my great aunt.

After the war, with his family already started, he worked with my great grandfather at the Autocar factory in Ardmore, Pennsylvania. A facility that was less than a block away from my lodge. It is that connection which prompted this post. As I was calling the long standing members of the lodge, I dialed a particular number and spoke to a brother in his early 80’s. While I only knew him as a brother he recognized my last name.

At first I thought he was talking about my uncle but after he offered a few more details it was clear that he was talking about my grandpop. He remembered him from his days (decades actually) as a member of the Narberth Volunteer Fire Company. As a Captain, I guess people remember you even decades later. Heck, I have met a brother or two that remember my dad and my uncle as volunteers with the ambulance corps.

It isn’t much but at least I am able to learn a little about him. And as is often the case, it only takes a few details to begin a story and that is exactly what I plan on doing. Maybe if I can add some more details and connect, in a more concise manner, all of the events in his life I might be able to get to know my grandpop a little better.

Detour To The Hospital

This week started off a little more hectic than usual but, for some reason, went much faster than I could have ever expected. However, there were times when I couldn’t help but slow down and step outside of the chaos for a few moments. It is something that comes naturally when a brother, a friend, is in need in some way. Those are the times when we come together and realize the bond that we have with our fellow brothers.

Over the weekend I had gotten an email from the Worshipful Master that he had fallen ill and would require a couple of days to back on task. I didn’t think anything of it at the time as we all have those moments when it simply takes a little bit of time to recover. A couple of days passed without improvement. Finally, he was admitted to the hospital on Wednesday night with, what I would later discover, was a severe infection.

Strangely enough the office had cleared out on Thursday by 5:30pm and I found myself driving down the highway, past my usual exit, and into the hospital parking garage. I really don’t like hospitals and tend to avoid them but that fact didn’t creep into my mind that night. I wasn’t sure if he was taking visitors or if he would be happy to see me but I couldn’t just go about my usual days and nights without checking in on him. It was only then when I was made aware of how serious things had gotten and how much improvement was already being made.  

It was an interesting experience as this was truly the first time that I was able to feel the bond that I have with one of my fellow brothers beyond the usual tasks and projects of the lodge. I have had similar experiences but not like this, not with a brother I have been working closely throughout the year. And the thing is, I know he would have done the same exact thing had the roles been reversed.

It was actually a good visit, at least as good as could be expected, and after about two hours I was on my way back home for the night. On my way back home with a list of tasks that I am happy to help him complete. I don’t know how they are going to get done but we, as a lodge, will somehow find a way. We always do!

I Lied For A Good Reason…

The past couple of weeks have been difficult for me. Not because of anything bad or some of the other things that I have previously written about, it has been difficult because nearly every time I spoke with my sister I had to lie to her. I usually call my sister once a week, sometimes more if there is something going on or being planned, and so I didn’t want to change that routine. However, it was not easy to find things to talk about when I was avoiding talking about any plans for this weekend… I think I even lied to her on her birthday.

From the beginning we knew it would be a challenge but when my brother-in-law said that he wanted to do this we all, without hesitation, agreed that we would do our best to pull it off. Given her long history of finding out any and all plans (or gossip) this was no small talk, especially considering how much my nephew likes to talk. But it was all worth it when we saw her get out of the car today completely surprised, and that is not easy, that we had pulled off a surprise birthday party. Like we would simply let her 40^th birthday come and go without throwing a party.

While for much of my life I didn’t really spend a lot of time talking and really getting to know her, as I have gotten older I have learned how great of a person my sister really is. I admire how much she has accomplished and, in certain instances, overcome. While there were times that I am certain weren’t easy she never gave up and always kept moving forward. At the same time, she was always there if we really needed her for anything. Again, I may have not been aware of it at the time but it is pretty darn clear in hind sight.

And it is great to see her turning 40 at this point in her life as the party itself says a lot not just about my sister but about my brother-in-law as well. The two of them, while it took a while, were made for one another and even though my sister is a pain in his butt back, you can tell that he wouldn’t have it any other way. For how much they both do for everyone else, pulling off this celebration is the least that we could do and I am happy that we could play some, albeit very small, role in pulling it off.

Masonic Marathon

The Tuesday’s immediately following our stated meeting are the nights when we train for the Masonic Marathon. These are the nights that consist of multiple degrees, hours of lodge time, and impressive demonstrations of memorization on the parts of those participating in the degree work. While it is not every month that such late nights occur, there are still the occasional evenings when I know my wife is not going to be happy with me when I walk through the apartment door.

This is not something any of us are paid to do. This is something that we do for our brothers and soon to be brothers. It is in the passion to see men improve themselves that we find the motivation to participate and congratulate. It is a regular experience that I consider a privilege to witness and play some small role in simply by being there.

Last night I found myself in the lodge during one of the longer nights when two degrees were conferred (it would have been three but there was a hold up as one of the candidates was not prepared). It was a long night to be sure but one during which we were able to see a man take his first steps in Freemasonry during the first half of the night and another man become a Master Mason in the second half of the night. In all, we were there for over three hours and departed the lodge absolutely wasted from the day.

Driving home it was interesting to think about the similarities and differences that some of the conferrers have as I have seen a number of different Past Masters confer degrees over the past 6+ months. From a brother in his forties to a brother in his eighties, all have has different approaches, presentations, styles and inflections while all maintaining an impressive script running through their minds.

Like the conferrers, the men whom have become Masons have been of all ages as well ranging from a man in his twenties to a man in his late seventies. All determined to become a part of the fraternity it just took a few of them a little longer than others. I have seen all these degrees from various vantage points as well. From simply being present to lend support to sitting as a stand in officer, to knowing that next year I will be playing a small but significant role throughout the process as Secretary.

This is not just a matter of seeking more light. It is seeing how the light is refracted and reflected. It is seeing the light from all angles and trying to take in as much as you can. It is a never ending journey and a process without pause as one can never capture every ray of light that is cast upon them.  

 

The Many Definitions Of Family

Whether you realize it or not we each have many different families in our lives. Of course we all have the family we are born into, the ones with which we share the same blood (good or bad). We also have the families that we marry into (again good or bad). But we also have other families whether they be through the military, through a fraternal organization, a community service organization, or whatever other groups that we become associated with during our lives and slowly develop a bond with over time.

There is another basic group that is a little tougher which comprises of some of the close friends that you meeting during the course of your many days that you build a trust with that can only be compared to the trust that you have with a family member. These are the people, at least for me, that are probably closest to blood without being related. This is a very small group maybe the smallest of them all. These are the people that you will do anything for just like you would for someone you share your DNA with and they treat you in the same manner (essential if you are going to consider them family in the first place).

One of these friends, I will call him my Irish brother, gave me a call this past week. It had been some time since we last spoke but, as usual, we picked up the conversation as if we sat down for lunch the day before. Unfortunately, this was not a call that contained good news. No death or unemployment but it was something equally jarring (some would even say more so). Having half a continent between us, all I could do is listen and offer the little advice I had (I have never found myself in the same position).

But sometimes, like family, the best thing that you can do is be there for them. They know you’re not going to be able to fix whatever is wrong, sometimes you just have to donate your ear and offer whatever encouragement and/or perspective that you can to try and get them through the rough spot in their life. It is a time when your own issues need to be put aside and all of your focus needs to be given to your unrelated family. In the end, if you consider them family you know they would be doing the same for you.

In this instance, I did what I could and tried to keep things in perspective. Being able to see everything from the outside looking in I know he is going to be better off and his future has been opened up to many more opportunities than he had before. Sometimes something bad needs to happen in order for the best in life to be laid at your feet. I am certain that is what will happen and I am looking forward to the calls from the other end of the spectrum in the near future.

Optimism is sometimes the best cure for what ails you and this was one of those instances. And while I tend to be a realist during my daily life there is nothing that says the two can’t coexist. So I will finish this post with a very simple collection of thoughts for my friend, my Irish brother: While it is hard to see through the foggy lens of shock and mourning for what has been lost, you have the opportunity of a lifetime. You have the ability to create memories that will never suffer the degradation of time. You have life opening up in front of you with opportunities unthinkable in the past. You have a future that will allow you to shine and bask in all that this world has to offer. You have been born again (and not in the loopy religious way). Stay strong and carry on!

Who Goes To Conshy For A Shoe?

It’s amazing to see the turn out for a district visitation simply to have the honor of taking possession of an old shoe. I guess it’s the simple pleasures (and bragging rights). Regardless of motivation, it’s the fellowship that matters and that is what keeps the Masonic road show going.

Over 80 brothers converged on Conshohocken last night for an evening that was both memorable and entertaining (even without a tiara in sight). With the hall quickly filling up, additional seating had to be brought in to accommodate the capacity crowd. It made it really easy to tell who came in late.

The multigenerational gathering was one that demonstrated the experiential spectrum of the room. Newer brothers were recognized along with those who were celebrating their Masonic birthday all with a wide variety of years as members of the craft. But what highlighted the evening for me were the words spoken by those who were honored for their 25 and 50 fraternal years as it reaffirmed the fact that we are all equal with the same motivation and bond that brought us to Fritz Lodge that night.

It is an honor to hear the words of those with so many years in the fraternity not because of the degrees they may have or the offices they have held but because you can see the lasting impact that the brotherhood has had on their lives. That is a Masonic education that can’t be found in any book and a value that those who have not been raised cannot understand. Those are the words that reinforce the brotherly bond and strengthen the generational ties to each other.

These are the nights that bring to the forefront a connection with the brothers that we never knew and those who are no longer with us. For many of us it also ties us to our Masonic genealogy knowing that the tradition and ceremony has been witnessed and embraced by us all, past and present. And, finally, it shows us the value of what we have, greater than ourselves, that we can pass down to future generations.

I hope that many of you either have experienced this or will experience it in the near future. I encourage all brothers to take the time to reflect on these points both in the lodge and during the normal course of your day. And for those of you who have not accepted the gift of Freemasonry, I encourage you to ask a Mason about their experience and what the fraternity has meant to them. Remember, to be one, ask one.

Finding Wisdom At The Playground

Oddly enough, this is the hardest post I have tried to write thus far. It’s not the best written piece but, hopefully, you can understand what I am trying to say without too many words cluttering the screen. In fact, it is a very simple sentiment but it is something that I don’t say enough and needed to finally be put down on the page.

I consider myself very lucky that I take after my father (even the fact that we both attract horrible drivers). I may not be as smart, I may not be as hard of a worker, I may not have any of the athletic ability, I may not be as outgoing but I strive to make myself better. I am thankful that I have someone I can look up to that has shown me how to be a great man and how to be a great father.

I know I haven’t always been the easiest son, I haven’t always made the best decisions, I haven’t always shown how grateful I am but my father has always supported me despite these shortcomings. In times of success and of failure he has always been there for me. And during times when nothing seems to be going my way, like now, I know he is behind me.

I am proud to say that many of the men in my family are the same way. I know that my brother and my brother-in-law would do anything for their kids and, in many instances, have done the same for the rest of the family. I hope that someday I can hold myself in equal measure.

We all have things we can work on and we all have things we wish we could change but, even though it may not always be obvious, we know that family comes first and that is the foundation to our improvement. We all look out for one another even when our own lives may be hectic. We all support one another even when the challenges are difficult. We all want the best for one another especially when it comes to the kids.  

So, make sure to take the time to appreciate your father today and think about how he has shaped your life. Maybe you didn’t have the best father but you can appreciate the fact that it makes you want to be a better parent because of that fact. Or, maybe you’re fortunate to have a great father and you live every day trying to reach that high standard. Either way, take the time to remember.

But also keep this in mind, while many of you may hold the same feelings toward your own fathers I have come to the same realization, which is true during every Father’s Day, that in this instance the playground ascertain from childhood holds true, “my dad is better than your dad!” I know this to be true because my father is the greatest man I have ever known.