Firearms Friday: Continuing The Dialogue

A couple of weeks ago I wrote a “Firearms Friday” post which was requested by a friend. I did what I could to address their original query but had no illusions that it would be an answer to their question. There are simply too many aspects to this whole discussion to offer a definitive response but it was a means to have a respectful dialogue. And so, with that in mind, below is their response to that post:

Thank you for taking the time to answer my question seriously. I really do appreciate it. Like you, I'd rather have smart laws and knee jerk reactions. As you say you may not be an expert, but you have more experience on this topic than I do and can point out the flaws in my arguments. My goal is a reduction in gun violence and I don't really care much how we get there, as long as it's a path that works and not a token effort.

Here are my immediate thoughts:

When I've been thinking about the problem of shootings I've been dividing it into three categories: one-on-one (most self defense cases would fall into this category, I imagine), one-on-many (mass shootings) and many-on-many (gang violence maybe?). I'm mostly concerned about the one-on-many, mass shooting case. I'm looking for ways that could render a gun less effective when attacking a crowd that would have minimal impact in the one-on-one case, and thus minimal impact on self defense uses. In our legal system it is considered inhumane to maim. If lethal force is warranted you are supposed to take lethal force. That is a sentiment I support. To be 100% clear: If your family is threatened, I want you to be able to defend yourself with lethal force.

I do think there are ways we can make guns less lethal in the one-on-many case that have little impact in the one-on-one case since. Bullet ricochet increases the number of casualties, whereas (I believe) it is a virtually non issue in most self defense cases. It's my understanding that most (all?) bullets are deadly, but not all bullets are equally effective at passing through a person harming the person behind them. Most one-on-one situations don't require dozens of dozens bullets be fired in mere seconds. This is why the arguments of limiting gun magazine sizes, limiting bullet caliber, and firing rate make so much sense to me. (Guns are machines and it is possible to engineer them to fire no faster than a specific rate, regardless of how fast one can pull the trigger.) For a one-on-one scenario, there is no rushing the shooter/person defending themselves. In a one-on-many such changes might give the crowd a chance. At least the casualty count should be lower.

I was unaware that there was a sport dedicated to conduct speed reloads. How long does it take the average-to-above-average person to reload? If it's non trivial, than limiting capacity sizes still makes sense to me. I think (hope) most would be mass shooters are not in the elite class.

I strongly agree with both your points that gun violence is glorified in the media, and that the way the media reports on shootings encourages copycats. I have no idea how this can be addressed given the first amendment.

I also agree that we as a nation need more support for mental health issues. What's less clear to me is what this kind of approach would look like, especially since mental health status can change. I think it's a noble, but unrealistic goal to catch everyone who would commit a mass killing before they have a chance to follow through. Besides, hate is protected under the first amendment. One cannot be committed saying people of a certain race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or anything else should be executed. (David Duke is a terrifying example of this.)

I know I will not change your opinion on the matter, but I support gun free zones. For what it's worth, I don't think the intention behind gun free zones is to prevent intentional shootings. As you, and others, have pointed out, there's nothing magical about a gun free zone that keeps bad guys with guns out. Rather, I thought gun free zones are intended to limit guns from areas where thinking may be impaired (such as places that serve alcohol) or judgement lacking (schools). They're intended to prevent heated arguments and rash decisions from turning into tragic mistakes. While I agree with you that we should hold the shooter responsible for his or her own actions, it's little solace to the person whose life was lost. In these situations I feel the potential for tragic accidents is so great it warrants special treatment.

In this response I will focus on where we seem to be the furthest apart. Let us begin by discussing “limiting gun magazine sizes, limiting bullet caliber, and firing rate” which, to this person, seem to be the options that make the most sense regarding the prevention of mass shootings while having little to no impact on the ability to defend themselves. Unfortunately, this is a flawed argument as the assumption is that “there is no rushing of the person defending themselves”. On the contrary, in many self-defense scenarios there is immense pressure for quick and effective action as seconds count… if you hesitate you are most likely dead. Further, under duress the use of multiple rounds is commonplace. This makes all three of the above options dangerous in a self-defense situation.  

While caliber is something that is thoroughly discussed within the firearms community the simple fact of the matter is that in a self-defense situation accuracy diminishes and stopping power and capacity play critical roles in eliminating the threat. Further, there is no predicting the size of the assailant or how they will be dressed so, personally, I would prefer to have a little more punch than average. Over-penetration is a reality which is why anyone with a reasonable amount of training (and, in my opinion, anyone who owns a firearm) should always be aware of their surroundings and what is behind their intended target. The final point in this is that limiting calibers is a slip and slide that I don’t car to ride as it is nearly impossible to enforce, it would put those who reload in a precarious position, and, most importantly, it is completely against the rights for which I stand.

Rate of fire is something that is already regulated as automatic weapons are classified as Class III firearms and only legal for ownership with those who undergo the scrutiny of the ATF application process (and pay the tax). To regulate rate of fire would not only be dangerous in a self-defense situation but would add over-complication to a rather elegant mechanism. We don’t need to Rube Goldberg firearms… look what that thought process has done to our government.

As for “gun free zones”, the idea that these places are made any safer by eliminating the presence of legal firearms is preposterous. It has proven, time and again, to be a fallacy… nothing more than a means to provide a “warm and fuzzy” feeling for some people. Anyone who has carried a firearm and knows others who carry on a regular basis knows that the one thing that maintains a person’s even temperament is not a sign but the fact that they are carrying a firearm. Those who accept this responsibility also accept the fact that they must go above and beyond when it comes to keeping calm in precarious or stressful situations. This also means that those who responsibly carry will not allow themselves to enter into an altered state of rage or intoxication.

While I would like to say that there is an answer to preventing, as a whole, the practice of mass shootings in this country that is simply not a part of reality. I have already made a few suggestions regarding how we can go about addressing the issue of mass shootings but they are by no means a way to “solve” the problem. The best way that we, as a society, can face this is to come to terms with the fact that this is the reality in which we live. And while the contrary is reported on the daily news, this persons primary objective has already been realized... shooting deaths and gun violence continue to decline while gun sales continue to rise.

However, an important point to remember is that while this person, and many others, continue to make statements regarding the importance of the first amendment and how it limits our ability to address certain statements, stances, and positions that heinous people take, those same people are willing to do anything to limit the second amendment. Remember, the only reason that the second amendment is second is so the first amendment has backup. Why is it that so many people are willing to acknowledge that heinous people are outliers regarding the beauty and effectiveness of the first amendment but those who commit heinous acts are representative of those who support the second amendment? While the person with which I am having this discussion isn’t one of these extremists, the position is all too common.  

If we really want a solution to the situation that we find ourselves in it would be to face the reality that there is evil in this world. Evil people will commit evil acts and we need to confront that evil head on by defending ourselves, defending others, and eliminating the threat when we are threatened. We can’t rely on government in general or legislation in particular. If anything, we need to eliminate the hurdles that continue to plague law abiding gun owners. We must educate ourselves, our families, and our fellow citizens about firearms. We must respect what they can do and appreciate the freedom that they represent. So, my advice is simple, go to a range. Understand, appreciate, and respect firearms. Teach one another. And never allow yourself to be helpless and maintain your self-reliance. I’m sure that this is not the response that they were looking for but it is an honest response and one that has proven, time and again, to be the most effective was to address the issues that we are currently facing.

Firearms Friday: From Tel Aviv To California

The news on Wednesday night was maddening and sad but, honestly, I can’t say that I was surprised. The reality of this world, especially in Israel, is that terrorist attacks are going to happen. I didn’t quite expect it to happen at this time, during Ramadan, but the fact remains that three shooters opened fire in a Tel Aviv market killing four people. Afterward there where a few reactions that also didn’t surprise me…

There was no widespread social media outpouring like that which we witnessed following other terrorist attacks in Europe or high profile shootings in the United States for that matter. Actually, there were a number of people and organizations beyond with the clear majority being those affiliated with Judaism or Israel in some way and the next closest, in the United States, being those of a more conservative nature.

Sadly, but again not surprisingly, the liberal media and various groups on the left either saw this as an opportunity to shame and blame Israel into conceding peace or, given the news coming out of California this week, use this as an opportunity to preach gun control through some delusional view of the situation and the world as a whole. And that this the real point that I am going to dwell on for a bit. Give me a minute while I collect myself….

The unfortunate state that this country finds itself in at the moment is that when there is a shooting somewhere in the United States or a well reported incident from around the world, the gun control storm troopers take to the internet, the television, the radio, and/or the podium and preach the flawed and unconstitutional “virtues” of gun control. It has gotten to the point that regardless of the facts of the incident, they celebrate the moment and seize the opportunity to politicize tragedy. They are perfectly happy to strip people of their rights and place the blame on an inanimate object while completely ignoring or dismissing the fact that the individual is responsible for what happened.

By and large, those same people react in the same manner when there is a terrorist attack in Israel as they, once again, seize the opportunity to berate Israel and use the recent incident as a “clear example” of why Israel must make peace. They are perfectly content in stripping Israelis of their security and blaming Israel for “creating this situation” while completely ignoring or dismissing the fact that the individual is responsible for what happened. Further they refuse to accept the reality that the Palestinian people take to the streets in celebration every single time this happens.

For the most part, we are now in a situation where Israel must defend herself and those of us here in the United States must defend ourselves. We both need to defend our right to live and our right to self-defense (despite the ruling in California). We must accept the guiding principle of personal responsibility and focus on the facts rather than accept the propaganda smeared across the headlines. We are Tel Aviv.

Mortgage Monday: Needing Separation

While I have a home office, I have yet to use it as much as I would like. In fact, I have used the kitchen more than any other place in the house to get work done and it has actually worked out well so far. While it may not be the optimal place to get projects done, it allows for greater flexibility to switch from work to family. Again, not the optimal work conditions but I can’t help it.

To be honest, the space I am currently using to get work done is more because of the fact that there are a few projects still incomplete around the house. Namely the organization of my office which at one point was pretty close but it now a bit disheveled. However, the biggest thing preventing me from using the space is the simple fact of noise. My office is currently open to the main entrance of the house and the stairs to the second floor. Any work that I do in the office could wake up our son.

This is just one of many projects (which have all been discussed previously) that have to be completed. I consider this one to be an essential change to improve the functionality of the space. And that it important to note… we have the space. This is a luxury that we have to work with… we don’t have to move things around or have multipurpose rooms. We have the space to separate everything and our goal is to separate work from the family.

That strong divide is something that I would like to reestablish sooner rather than later. Not only am I able to be more efficient and productive but I can keep the piles of papers and my computer out of the family space of the house. We all need that divide between work and home whether it is a long drive or simply a door between rooms. Of course, the nice thing is that my wife and I both have our own spaces which we can make our own because, again, we have the space to do it. But this will also take a little time.

It just goes to show that things still need to be figured out over time even though you may have found the perfect home for your family. There are always going to be projects that have to be done to fine tune the house to fit your needs. This is because of the simple reality that a perfect home is going to be an imperfect house.  

Setting Aside Networking Time

Every day I try to set aside about 15 minutes simply to send out a few emails or make a couple of calls to people that I have met recently or to reconnect with those that I haven’t spoken to in some time. This is both something that I enjoy doing but also part of my job as networking is essential to my line of work. Investing that nominal amount of time each day is well worth the effort and has proven to be hugely beneficial over the years both personally and professionally.

However, there are a few things that I have found to be essential to this outreach over the years. The first being that you cannot be selling when trying to open or reopen communications with someone. I have fallen into this trap a few times in my life when trying my hand at various occupations related to sales. That being said, I have never claimed to be a salesperson and never will claim to have the skill set necessary for success in that line of work. But it is an aspect that I am still well aware of in my current outreach as I prefer to focus on getting to know people rather than trying to get business from them or persuade them to attend an event.

The second essential aspect to effective outreach for me has been to forego social media. While these sites have undoubtedly proven useful in making the basic connections with people and to learn a little bit about them, they should not be used as a means of communication. Personal emails are much more effective in opening up a dialogue but still have limits. Connecting over the phone provides a personal touch and demonstrates that you are taking the time and putting forth the effort to not just talk but to listen and learn about the other person.

The third and final piece of the puzzle is the easiest of them all… listening and learning. Don’t just blankly reach out to people; learn all you can about them before writing that email or picking up the phone. This is where social media should be leveraged. See what they have posted, liked, commented on. Find their birthday, dates of life events, work anniversary, previous places of employment. Essentially, find that commonality that you share with them and use that to start the conversation. Networking is not about business, it is about getting to know people and finding things in common with the people you know is a great way to strengthen your network.  

Finally, familiarize yourself with pictures. There have been countless occasions when I have been at business and social event when I have seen a familiar face. Many connections have started in the virtual world but, by knowing what many of my connections look like, I was able to properly introduce myself in the midst of a large crowd. Most of the time, this is what truly separates you from the countless other connections that someone has made in the virtual world. In the end, never forget the importance of meeting someone face to face… networking can only survive and thrive in the real world.

House Mail

Over the last few days my wife and I have received a few letters in the mail regarding our house... another couple of firsts… which were equally good and bad. The first letter that we received was something that we knew was going to show up eventually and we weren’t looking forward to it… our property tax bill. It is almost like being lulled into a false sense of relief when looking at this total with the knowledge of what our total annual taxes are on the property. This was obviously the first and much smaller bill… the school tax bill will arrive this summer.

Having paid our taxes up front at settlement… actually, our mortgage includes the funds being held in escrow that we need for our annual taxes… I scanned and sent the invoice off to the bank. While it means a pretty significant increase in your monthly mortgage payment I do recommend having the bank hold these tax related funds in escrow as the last thing that I wanted to pay this past month was a rather substantial property tax bill. It was reassuring to see this invoice taken care of without a big hit to our account and without any impact on the amount we still owe the bank.

Another piece of mail that I scanned and sent to the bank was our official approval for our Homestead Exclusion. Essentially, since we own this property which serves as our primary home, we are entitled to a slight reduction in our school taxes. And when I say slight I mean very, very small. But, at the end of the year, whatever that amount may be, it is still money that stays in our account. Given the size of the invoice that we are bound to receive, about 2-3 times more than the initial bill from the township, it will be nice to be able to hold on to a few extra dollars.

I guess you could say that these are a few of the unpleasant first time experiences as new homeowners but, in the end, we wouldn’t change a thing. There are some ‘negative’ things about ownership and the responsibilities that we now have as partners in this endeavor but, in the end, they are minor in comparison to the benefits and security that we now have in our home. We know where we are going to be for the long term. We know where our son is going to grow up. We own our home and we have land that we are free to enjoy (after taxes).

Mortgage Monday: The Beginning

It is time for a new series… having purchased and moved into our new home last week I thought it appropriate to write a post every Monday about being a new homeowner. While the topics may vary these blogs will all be rooted in our recent purchase, the process, and some of the things that happen along the way. I will be writing about the services we use, experiences we have had, or simply how much things have changed in comparison to our years (and year) or renting. It is certainly a change for us but a great one that I want to share with all of you that continue to read these posts.

The process of finding a home was a long one to say the least. As I have written about numerous times before, this has been a dream of ours for years (certainly preceding the formation of this blog) and a search that has taken us to numerous places throughout the area, into other states, and even to a foreign country. While our criteria has changed since our first discussion about what we wanted our home to be, we currently find ourselves in the perfect place at the perfect time. Finally, we have a place to set our roots and a place where we can raise our son.

Looking back there are certainly things that we would have liked to have changed along the way. Even recently, it took a deal falling through on inspections in order for us to find our perfect home but, as we have been told many times before and as we keep telling ourselves, things happen for a reason. However, while we are happy with this wonderful change and becoming homeowners, my wife and I definitely agree and wish that this whole process had gone differently. Our ability to find a home came at a price that we were forced to pay and we know that we would give this all back if a refund were offered.

Look for more posts in the future that will get into some of the additional details about the process and some of the experiences that we have along the way both good and bad (hopefully there will be an absence of content for the latter). But, for now, we are going to enjoy this new way of living and the additional comfort and security that owning a home has to offer to us. And, of course, some stories about the adjustments that we are all making to this new reality.

TMI Tuesday: My Remote!

Our son already has a bad habit. While we keep the television time to a minimum, he still insists on reaching for the remote every time that he thinks that he can grab it. It got to eh point that we had to order a toy remote so that he would stop trying to play with the real thing. We even turned the sound off on the toy to make it more realistic (a.k.a. keep us from throwing it out the window and running it over with the car nine or ten times). It works most of the time but, every once in a while, he still reaches for the real thing… he probably knows that the toy is simply a BS ploy.

It is also interesting to see what shows he enjoys watching. There are a few children’s programs that he tolerates (Chuggington and Mickey Mouse Club) but, overall, he likes more of the adult programs especially those that daddy like to watch too. For our son there is nothing more entertaining than a new episode of Deadliest Catch or watching the occasional appearances of Norm Abram on This Old House. There are plenty of other shows but the main thing that they all have in common is that he like the reality programs more than anything. Not the useless reality shows mind you but the ones where you can tell that he is storing some random knowledge that he will use later in life.

We have tried other shows but there is nothing that really holds his attention. Thankfully, he agrees with daddy that Elmo is probably the most annoying thing to fill the screen. Well, it is at least pretty close to the women on The View. Those are the faces that when they show up on the television he either squirms and looks away or he outright screams at the horror that he is now witness to. He is definitely smart beyond his years.

The funny thing is that when there is something on that he doesn’t want to watch he puts aside his ploy of a toy and does his best to reach for the real remote. And you better either give it to him or change that channel really fast or the frustration becomes evident in his mood change. Just hope that there isn’t a Joy Behar rant going on or you will see him go from calm to crazy at ludicrous speed. And no one wants to see a baby go plaid.

Where Did All Of Our Money Go?

Every couple of weeks I look at my pay stub and go through the growing list of deductions from my pay… taxes, 401K, and healthcare. Taxes have always been relatively consistent (too high and annoying but consistent), the 401K contribution is something that I set (this I hope to increase in the future), and the healthcare costs have gone up over time according to how many people are covered under my plan which now covers my whole family. However, it is this last significant deduction from my pay that is really annoying. Not because of the direct costs outlined in the deduction but because of the high costs that my wife and I have encountered recently.

For years, every month we have encountered a co-pay in one form or another, office or pharmacy, that is in addition to the insurance premium that we have already paid for that month. Over the past year, those required payments have become more frequently as we have had more doctor visits and prescriptions that needed to be filled. However, these last few months have been atrocious and it really makes you wonder where the money is going. Since our son was born, we have sent out checks for approximately $2500 just to cover the astronomical co-pays. I have seen enough doctors during my life that I have gotten used to the various expenses associated with healthcare but this is simply ridiculous.

I can hear some of you now saying this is why we need Obamacare. Well, in my experience, that is a load of crap! While the delusional utopian concept is intriguing to many it is not something that fits into the confines of reality. This is why we have seen those premiums increase faster since the bill was signed than at any other point in history. Additionally, due to the ridiculous requirements therein, not only have the premiums gone up but the co-pays have seen a sharp increase as well.

Of course, there is also the basic employment fallout. I know for a fact that many employers have set limits on hours simply to avoid having to offer healthcare benefits. Frankly, I have no problem with employers not offering benefits to full time employees so long as said employees understand that they will not be offered. So, instead of someone getting paid for 35-40 hours per week, they are limited to 29.5 hours per week. In the end, they still aren’t getting benefits and now have less money in their pockets.

Furthermore, there are some benefits that were being offered to those who worked 30 or more hours per week. A perfect example that I have seen is that of extended leave. However, because hours are now eliminated that benefit disappears as well. So not only are you getting paid less at the end of the week but you are also losing some of the benefits that you once had. An when you go back to the original gripe in this post, you are also going to pay more for insurance and more in co-pays. You couldn’t afford to get sick before and you still can’t afford it now. Thanks Obamacare!

Maybe we should focus on making sure people can have jobs where they can work full time hours. Maybe we should stop regulating and forcing coverage on people and stop strong arming companies to cover employees. Maybe we should address the high premiums and co-pays that have become the accepted norm in this country. Maybe we should provide a true freedom to choose to have coverage and what coverage to have, whether someone is willing to take a job without healthcare benefits, and whether an employer offers healthcare benefits. Maybe this is the change that we really need!

An Unexpected Work Email

Soon after my son entered this world my wife and I were both on Facebook sending the first photos of his arrival and chatting with some family and friends about his early arrival. While on the social media site I also came across an interesting message from a company that I had not worked with for over three years. At my previous public relations firm I had led the account for this company and every now and again I would read the updates posted by the CEO and send a quick message here and there about where I was and what I was doing. However, this message was completely out of the blue.

The note was very simple requesting my email address so that he could have his head of PR get in touch with me. I didn’t give it a second thought and gladly sent him my work email. As day turned into night and other events clearly taking precedence in my mind, I had forgotten about the brief chat by the next morning. A couple of days later, having just woken up from a less than refreshing sleep in a hospital bed, I opened my work email and found a message which filled in a few of the missing pieces.

As it turns out, the company was once again looking to invest in public relation in the US and I was one whom the CEO thought of to get the process moving. Keep in mind that this was my favorite company and CEO to work with in the past but since that time I had little contact with him. It was flattering to say the least that he thought enough of me to circle back after such a long time.

When I first started working with this company they really were in the early stages of development and exposure. Over time we worked together to hit a number of milestones both in the size of the company and the funding that it had behind its continued development. Since I last worked with them they have increased in size by over 400% and all the things that we talked about in the past of wanting to do were now coming to fruition.

Since those email correspondences, I have spoken with the company over the phone and provided a little more background on what I am going now and the vast capabilities of my current company. We are moving forward in this exploratory process and I am hopeful that we will be able to work together as this is still a company that I am very excited about and I want to be a part of the growth and immense potential that it continues to possess. However, at the very least, I am happy that the CEO felt the same about me and that all the things that we discussed over three years ago are now a reality.

When The Surreal Becomes Reality

Chapel of Peace at West Laurel Hill Cemetery

My wife and I (my wife more than I) have spent the last week trying to prepare ourselves for today. Throughout the week, my wife was fielding daily texts and phone calls from family asking for her opinion on how things should be arranged. I was asked on one occasion but, being that I didn’t feel it was appropriate for me to decide anything, I respectfully declined to offer my opinion. With everything going on and all preparations being made there was still nothing that we could have prepared us for this moment this morning.

We arrived at the cemetery a few minutes after 10 finding one of the last remaining spots near the entrance to the chapel. The baby was quiet the entire ride over and we were expecting him to get a little fussy when we finally made it inside and found a few seats. The room was already beginning to fill up with family, friends, and former coworkers so we found a place off to the side and prepared for the noise to erupt from below the car seat cover.

While I was sitting watching the baby my wife was greeting those who walked over to offer their condolences and congratulations while I just kept thinking about this whole surreal experience. The people and memories kept coming... I can’t imagine what it was like for my wife. By the time the service started there were well over 100 people there listening to my wife’s uncle conduct the service… a role his is very familiar with even if this was not the kind of conducting with which he was familiar.

Throughout the service, I couldn’t help but think about all the times that we would meet somewhere for dinner or stop by the house and she would be ranting about something or someone. There were times when the two of us would argue about things but with each of us always ending up coming to the conclusion that we simply had slightly different views. She was someone that I always respected for both her opinionated nature and intelligence. This was something that was reciprocated time and again.

It is hard to think that those times are but memories at this point and that our son will only know her through pictures and stories. But he will know who she was and the family from which she came. And while she may not be able to hold him like his other grandparents, there is no doubt that she is looking over him… maybe that is why he was so quiet and calm throughout the morning. Quiet and calm despite some of the things I am sure she was saying about the service and some of the people there. I am sure she had a few things to say about the snow which began to fall shortly before the service ended as well. 

Back To The Present

The New Year has started and there is a lot that we have to look forward to in the coming months and a lot that we have to be thankful for from the past year. In the past I have taken this opportunity to make a list of resolutions and to look back on the previous year. Well, those posts will be coming soon but I found myself thinking about something else today… Back to the Future… part 2.

A couple of days ago I found my wife watching the first movie in the trilogy as I ventured up the stairs and got ready for bed. It has always been one of those movies that she would fall asleep to and I really don’t mind because I remember watching them growing up as well. Last night we had to change things up as she had watched part one for a couple of nights in a row. So I put in part two, tucked her in, and came down stairs to get some work done not thinking too much about what was flickering on the screen.

As the clock struck midnight and the calendar turned another page, I could hear the faint sounds of the fictional 2015 echoing down the stairs as the reality of that year was around me. It is amazing to think about something that seemed so far off when we were growing up to now be a reality. While always a little far afield in their predictions, it is even more entertaining to see the drastic difference between reality and the trajectory that Hollywood portrayed over two decades ago.

So where is my freaking flying car?!?!

I am fascinated watching the prediction of the flying car, hover boards, Café 80’s (I am sure there are a few that are around), rehydrating dinner (makes me think of Ramen noodles), 3-D advertisements on the street, the national weather service, and faxing still a prevalent form of communication. All of these things are in addition to the craziness of the ‘fashion’ which you could tell came out of the time when the movie was made. It would be interesting if these things were really part of our daily life but that is not the case.

However, what might be more interesting is what is not represented. The internet and email are a huge part of daily life but are nowhere to be found on the screen. Smart phones are more ubiquitous than the walkie-talkies that Marty and Doc employ but don’t make an appearance. Flat screen televisions have replaced the large boxes that once played our movies but the café still contained the former format. And did you see the size of those discs where they hid Jennifer?

So while we may not have flying cars and weather that we can control to suit our needs (or time travel), there are still a lot of things that we have today that even Hollywood couldn’t predict. It certainly isn’t all perfect but things could be a lot worse as 2015 gets under way. Of course, we will have to see if the Cubs to really beat Miami in the World Series this year… now that would be one heck of a prediction.

The Naïveté Of The Transition

Every time this happens I can’t help but think, well isn’t that cute! Governor Corbett did the same thing when he won the election in 2010 and not Tom Wolf (in sheep’s clothing) is doing the same thing during his transition. In summary, as was reported in The Philadelphia Inquirer on Wednesday, he “announced an ethics policy for transition-team advisers that includes an absolute gift ban, and said he would curb the practice of giving no-bid contracts to private law firms when he takes office.”

Even though this thought process and temporary stance is more prevalent the further left the politician is on the political spectrum, this isn’t a naïve mentality solely associated with one party over the other. Whether they truly believe this or not it all comes down to what the public wants to hear and, more specifically, what their base wants to hear. It is a moment during the political process when they believe in their invincibility allowing their political IQ to take a significant, albeit momentary, dip. I guess you could say that each politician has their Thomas More moment and this statement is just that for many political figures.

This seemingly simple act is indicative of the kind of grandiose politics that is to be expected in the current system and it is the reason why things are so polarized. Too many people now view politicians as a means to escape their current reality rather than changing their own station in life. Those politicians see this and know that the kind of statements and stances that need to be taken have to reflect a means of false hope. And that is all this really is as there is no way that this stance will hold and is probably why the letter released by the campaign specifies that that the ‘gift ban’ applies to the transition team with no mention of the staff that he will have in place once he takes office.

Whether we like it or not, politics is a game of give and take. Gifts and privileges are part of that game both of which are completely legal if they are declared. This give and take is the means to accomplish the political goals. What this distills down to is that every politician, no matter the words they speak or letters they release to the press, plays this game. So those who claim to not take these gifts are the ones that refuse to maintain any level of actual transparency. But they tell the electorate what they want to hear so the façade hold up.

Finding Your Roots vs. Who Do You Think You Are?

When talking about genealogy with people it is common for the conversation to touch upon the show “Who Do You Think You Are?” Over the years, all different kinds of people have watched the show regardless of their interest level in genealogy as a whole or their own family tree… they usually watch because they are a fan of some actor, actress, or athlete and want to learn a little more about them. More often than not, this leads them to jump to the conclusion of “I wish I had stories like that in my family tree.”

The people I have spoken with make that determination that those types of stories do not exist in their tree mostly because the show focuses on a single line in that celebrity’s genealogy. I guess you could say that is the one thing that many of us familiar with genealogy have a problem with when it comes to the show “Who Do You Think You Are?” It is for this reason that I tend to pay closer attention to and enjoy “Finding Your Roots” a little more than the main stream counterpart.

Like any PBS show, “Finding Your Roots” isn’t as well-known but it takes a much more interesting and broader look at the ancestry of celebrities (of all kinds not just main stream). During the course of an episode, three family trees are analyzed with a common thread running between the three stars. Sometimes it can be as broad as overcoming adversity while other times it is tied to a specific event such as the roles their ancestors played in the Civil War.

While that is one difference (one vs. three) the other, more important and more interesting differentiator is the fact that the latter of the two shows looks at the family tree as a whole not just a singular line (or two). From my own experience, I know that this is the most interesting part of genealogy as you never know what names, places, and events may be adding color to the individual leaves. After all, we are the culmination of all these people who played, for the most part, equal roles in determining the family story and making us who we are.

“Who Do You Think You Are” may have the bigger audience, interesting locations, and larger budget, “Finding Your Roots” brings us closer to the interesting realities of doing genealogical research. Furthermore, the latter show also explores the use of DNA in discovering the mix of places, races, and heritage that exists within all of us. This is why my preference is quite clear but, in the end, taking a look at the sponsorship, Ancestry.com wins no matter which show you prefer.

“Happy” Birthday!

Thought my wife would enjoy this one. 

When it comes to my birthday I look at it as simply turning another year older… actually you’re only turning a day older. However, I enjoy celebrating birthdays of family and friends. Today I was able to do just that as my wife’s birthday snuck up on the two of us.

While she has always had mixed emotions during her day, this year was particularly bipolar as there is a lot of things swirling around our life right now and a huge amount of uncertainty, nervousness, and trepidation concerning the future. However, there were moments today that transcended all the things around us and floating above our heads. Those are the moments that will forever make this birthday one to remember.

It all started with the simple transition from yesterday to today as I was able to turn to her and think about the fact that, unlike in our previous years together, she is not just a wife, she is a mother to be. While not being toted around in her arms, she is able to celebrate this birthday with our child. Having just marked 20 weeks, we know that while baby is still freeloading, it can hear the happiness and the celebration.

Of course, recent news has curbed the joy of the day but there were moments, however short they might have been, when we were all able to enjoy the present. There was a few times when that little wrinkle of worry would fade, eyes would brighten just a little, and we were all temporarily focusing on our present actions. Yesterday and tomorrow were fleetingly pushed out of our minds.

Reality is kind of funny that way. While there is that which is immediately around us, there is also that which transcends that place and time. In the moment, we were shopping for maternity clothes, trying on shoes, and enjoying a tasty (and very large) meal at Cheesecake Factory talking about all the changes that have happened over the past year, memories of previous birthdays, and looking forward to life with the new baby. But that was only part of the reality.

We were all thinking about the unpleasant things in life and the pending hardships to be faced. Throughout the day, my wife was stronger than I think I have ever seen her. And while it is not how anyone expects to spend a birthday, there were those moments that you can’t help but remember and smile. It was a good day and sometimes that is the best gift that can be given. So, with all that said, I want to devote the last words to my wife…

While I wish I could give you the gift of an alternate universe where your sadness doesn't exist, I hope that this day with its moments of happiness will suffice. I love you and I look forward to many more birthdays in the future (especially when I can help baby pick out a gift for you)! Stay strong and know that I am always here for you.

A Little After Work Entertainment

Office parties are always an interesting balance between business and reality. On one hand you head in there knowing that there are people you have been trying to track down for days and need to get a few quick answers or schedule a few meetings for the following week while, at the same time, you just want to relax a little bit and enjoy the informal get together. The trick is learning the give and take of the two.

Tonight was one of those nights for me as I attended a client’s holiday party. There were a couple quick things that I need to talk to a few people about but I made sure I worked them in and moved on as fast as possible. They had to get handled but I didn’t want to ruin the night with work. Plus you want to avoid getting the evil eye from their wife who is standing a couple feet away listening to every word.

The rest of the time is an excellent opportunity to let your guard down just a little bit and talk to as many people as you can. While you undoubtedly know many of them, there are bound to be a few people whom you’ve never met and a handful of people who have, until tonight, been a name on an email. Just like any event, meeting, or other type of gathering I’ve been to I go into it with the simple reality that you never know who you are going to meet or what you will wind up talking about.

Tonight the topics ranged from Rotary, Masonry, and other clubs and organizations to politics, firearms, and genealogy. It was quote the interesting night of ever changing dialogue and jumping from one completely different topic to another based on the person with whom I was speaking. But it was fun having a little variety in the night and I was able to learn a lot about many of the people in attendance.

Inevitably, at just about every office party I have ever been to, there always seems to be someone who becomes very loud toward the end of the night. Usually someone who has had a little too much to drink, whose face is about three shades beyond pink, and they still have a drink in their hand. Often their volume is accompanied with an overestimation of their abilities and a lack of appreciation for others around them (as well as people not around to defend themselves).

I like to remember these parties, the good and the bad, which is why I don’t drink at such events. Of course, the other major factor is that often I have to drive home but mainly it is because I don’t want to risk forgetting the details of what took place, again the good and the not so good. It is also ensures that I don’t turn into that guy. And if you’ve never seen that guy at an office party you better get some help. Don’t be that person. Be the one who remembers.

Not Your Usual Forbes 400 Gripe

Yesterday I was reading about the newly released list of the 400 Richest Americans as reported by Forbes magazine. Shortly after browsing the countdown of the usual suspects I started reading comments across the web about the state of the country and the “greed” that is supposedly pervasive in our society. It never fails, every time a list like this is compiled, especially the annual Forbes edition, the same comments pop up.

Before I go any further (and really get into my rant) lets go over some of the broad strokes about the list. First, let’s briefly go over how the list is compiled. According to Forbes, they prefer to meet with potential candidates in person and, during this year’s process, spoke with nearly 100 billionaires (interviews with those in their inner circle and employees were also pursued in this annual endeavor). When calculating the bottom line they looked to numerous public sources including (i.e. Securities & Exchange Commission documents, court records, probate records, federal financial disclosures and Web and print stories) and took into considerations all assets including stakes in public and private companies, real estate, art, yachts, planes, ranches, vineyards, jewelry, car collections and more. Finally, just like anyone’s balance sheet, debts were taken out at the end to calculate the final figure.

I don’t know how I would feel having to calculate those gargantuan figures knowing the salary I would potentially be making as a columnist or editor but kudos to the people that put forth the considerable effort.

What made this year’s list particularly interesting, and which might account for the increases venom in some of the responsive commentary strewn about, is the tremendous growth that the overall list has experienced over the past year (approximately $300 billion). With a current total of just over $2 trillion, or roughly the equivalent of the GDP of Russia, the average net worth of the 400 currently stands at $5 billion with the cost of entry being a staggering $1.3 billion. The last time the average was this high was in 2007 and 2008 before the financial meltdown. Unfortunately, the list was limited to 400 which meant that 61 American billionaires were left out in the cold licking their wounds.  

Many people have read these figures and voiced their bitter opinions about these people whom they’ve never met. My view is very simple, good for you. The vast majority of the people on this list worked their tails off to reach that level of wealth paying more in taxes along the way than most of us will ever make in our lives. Good for them.

Despite what may have been preached to some, life isn’t fair and we are not equal. Some people are more fortunate than others, some get lucky breaks along the way, and others are never able to reach the one percent let alone achieve top 400 status. The majority of these people worked hard for what they have and have been smart with their money. The top two, Buffett and Gates, are prime examples in that they started with very little, worked hard, and were smart with their business and financial decisions. Good for them.

Maybe the problem in this country is not in the one percent, it is in those members of the 99 percent that lack a good work ethic and expect someone to take care of them. I am far from the one percent and I don’t expect to ever fall into that category (it would be nice though) but I want to work and I chose to earn my money rather than collect the same exact amount in unemployment. This is not to say that unemployment is a bad thing, sometimes it truly is needed, and sometimes it is unavoidable. But many people have the choice.  

Sometimes reality stinks but you have the chose to either accept it or work your butt off and change it. Many on that list did just that. So, to all of you out there complaining about the “one percent” in this country, stop it! The problem is not in those who chose to work and are successful in their endeavors, the problem lies in those choosing not to work. Let this free advice be your last handout.  

SIDE NOTE: If you have enough time and energy to protest, you have enough time and energy to work. All too often I have found myself watching reports on protests (on a variety of topics) which took place in the middle of the day and found myself wondering why those people weren’t at work. And many times those protesters have prevented others from getting to work and doing their jobs. You have the right to your opinion and you have the right to share it but, come on, this is getting out of hand.