Setting Aside Networking Time

Every day I try to set aside about 15 minutes simply to send out a few emails or make a couple of calls to people that I have met recently or to reconnect with those that I haven’t spoken to in some time. This is both something that I enjoy doing but also part of my job as networking is essential to my line of work. Investing that nominal amount of time each day is well worth the effort and has proven to be hugely beneficial over the years both personally and professionally.

However, there are a few things that I have found to be essential to this outreach over the years. The first being that you cannot be selling when trying to open or reopen communications with someone. I have fallen into this trap a few times in my life when trying my hand at various occupations related to sales. That being said, I have never claimed to be a salesperson and never will claim to have the skill set necessary for success in that line of work. But it is an aspect that I am still well aware of in my current outreach as I prefer to focus on getting to know people rather than trying to get business from them or persuade them to attend an event.

The second essential aspect to effective outreach for me has been to forego social media. While these sites have undoubtedly proven useful in making the basic connections with people and to learn a little bit about them, they should not be used as a means of communication. Personal emails are much more effective in opening up a dialogue but still have limits. Connecting over the phone provides a personal touch and demonstrates that you are taking the time and putting forth the effort to not just talk but to listen and learn about the other person.

The third and final piece of the puzzle is the easiest of them all… listening and learning. Don’t just blankly reach out to people; learn all you can about them before writing that email or picking up the phone. This is where social media should be leveraged. See what they have posted, liked, commented on. Find their birthday, dates of life events, work anniversary, previous places of employment. Essentially, find that commonality that you share with them and use that to start the conversation. Networking is not about business, it is about getting to know people and finding things in common with the people you know is a great way to strengthen your network.  

Finally, familiarize yourself with pictures. There have been countless occasions when I have been at business and social event when I have seen a familiar face. Many connections have started in the virtual world but, by knowing what many of my connections look like, I was able to properly introduce myself in the midst of a large crowd. Most of the time, this is what truly separates you from the countless other connections that someone has made in the virtual world. In the end, never forget the importance of meeting someone face to face… networking can only survive and thrive in the real world.

Firearms Friday: Turning Down Range Time

Having been so busy lately with work and a few unavoidable occurrences, I have spent some time over the last week trying to reconnect with a few people and return some calls that simply came in at the wrong time. A few of these correspondences that ended with the desire to get together in the near future to catch up with a couple people having a specific idea as to where we should meet… at the range. Each time I reflected on my lack of practice and tried to recall the last time that I was able to relax on the line. Safe to say that it has been far too long.

While I cannot recall a specific date when I last grabbed my range bag and headed out the door, I still recall both the frustration with myself and the relaxation afterward. It is one of those interesting dichotomies that comes with the passion for a particular sport or hobby. It really makes me curious as to what state I will find my skills in when I am finally able to return to my happy place… not sure if I want others to see the results of my overly busy schedule.

I would like to get out but there are just too many things that need to get done and any time that I have to dedicate to this hobby that might come up in the near future has to be dedicated to building and maintenance as that too has been lacking. At least this will give me a few more items to test when I can commit the time and everything else will have been looked over and cleaned recently. It will also give me a few more things to talk about when I can join them on the lane.

Unfortunately, things don’t seem like they will be changing any time soon. My schedule is still full and I am actually still trying to make up for lost time from the past month of chaos. I had no other choice than to turn down the offer of this particular meeting place with the hope to meet this time around somewhere that is more agreeable to the confines of my calendar. Maybe we can follow up this next meeting with some range time.

I know that I have to find the time to practice… this is a perishable skill after all. And I know that it will be good for me to shut out the rest of the world for just a few minutes but the reality of life won’t allow me to do that at the moment. But the hope it still there that we can make this happen soon… maybe sooner than I think. However, for now I am just going to try and catch up on my work.

Mortgage Monday: A Means To Reconnect

There has been an unexpected benefit to moving into our own house that we have enjoyed over the past several months. Since the day the movers unpacked our furniture and belongings at our new address, we have been able to get together with a number of people with whom we have lost contact over the last couple of years. With all that has transpired we, for lack of a better term, closed ranks for a while just trying to get through some of the tougher moments that we have encountered. Since moving we have been able to open up and reconnect with a myriad of people that have been nothing but supportive and understanding of all that has gone on.

Recently, we were able to invite our Rabbi and his wife to our new home for lunch. I personally owe this man a lot for helping me become who I am today most notably in serving as my mentor during my conversion. My wife and I owe them both a great deal for providing us with the support and guidance over the years specifically during a rather interesting Aliyah experience. We were lucky to have them close by when we were living in Israel and were able to meet with them on several occasions to help us with our difficult decision to return.

As I mentioned previously, this has also been the impetus, or at least one of the contributing factors, in motivating us to restart our family newsletter. It is reassuring to know that in future years these annual reports will always be coming from our home… there is no longer the question of from where the newsletter will be sent. And we no longer have to include a section about moving. By the way, after a few unexpected delays, they are finally in the mail!

Most importantly, over the past few months, our home has been a means to reconnect with people. As I have admitted before, I am not the best person at keeping in touch with others. This has proven to be a great way to restart long dormant conversations and a means to discuss updates with friends and find out what they have been up to. Of course, now the goal is to keep myself from reverting back into old habits and putting forth the effort, and finding the time, to have substantive conversations with friends and family that I truly enjoy talking to and with which I continue to have great conversations.  

Alumni Updates

They even changed the logo within the past 10 years. 

Over the past several months I have been receiving regular communications from my Alma mater, Endicott College. Since it has now been a decade since I graduated from the New England school, the alumni association is obviously ramping up efforts to bring everyone back for the ten year reunion. While the emails and mailings have been plentiful to the point of becoming borderline annoying, it has at least been a welcomed change from the frequent request for donations.

Obviously, with all the changes that have happened recently and the plans that we have already scheduling for the summer month, we will not be driving up to Massachusetts and the beautiful coastal campus this year. Thankfully, we made the trip just 5 years ago for our one year anniversary and so I was at least able to show my wife were I spent four years of my life. At some point we will bring our son up there and show him around too.

While I may not be able to attend, that doesn’t mean that I cannot reconnect (or in some cases connect) with many of those who finished their undergraduate experience the same day I did. In-between correspondences from the college, I got an email from a former classmate addressed to all of those a decade removed from their North Shore education. It was an invitation to offer an update and share it with everyone included on the email chain. While I didn’t know many of other students beyond the classroom, preferring the poets and professors around me, it has been interesting reading many of the updates.

It is interesting to read where people have ended up and the experiences that they have had since leaving college. While not nearly as interesting as those I have read but, so far, more interesting than those who have yet to write anything, I look forward to sharing my own update at some point within the next week. Basically, it all boils down to a simple timeline since that warm May day: published a book (and other pieces in magazines), graduate school, conversion, met my wife and got married, various jobs, moving to various places, writing, lodge, and starting a family. I think that pretty much covers everything.

So now that I have a basic template all I need to do is find the time to write the email. Of course, that will have to wait until I get over the fact that it has already been 10 years when the memories of my time there are still so vivid. I guess great memories stay with us longer than we realize.

When Was The Last Time I Was Here?

The view from my seat.

Thursday was another late night in the city as the entire office (at least those not on vacation) headed to the Pennsylvania Convention Center for the Enterprise Awards. While I would much prefer spending the evening with my family at home, it is an evening that only comes around once a year and it offers many of us a chance to catch up with those with whom we rarely have a chance to run in to during the course of our usual week. For me, it is also the event when I can personally thank the person who introduced me to my current employer two years ago. Thankfully the night was uneventful and I didn’t have any encounters with potholes on my way into the city!

I have never been one who has enjoyed driving in the city and I really don’t care much for cities in general (of course, there are exceptions to every rule which has been evident in previous posts).  As I circled around the block and into the parking garage I tried to think about the last time that I had been to the convention center. Unable to think of the event, I corkscrewed up to the 5^th level and found a space in close proximity to the 13^th Street elevator.

As I got out of the car and began walking to the far end of the floor, I joined a couple of other people also wearing tuxes. As we chatted during our decent to the ground level, out the doors, and made our way down the sidewalk it was an interesting twist on what is usually a common occurrence for me. As it turns out, they were the ones headed to a lodge meeting while I was off to some other event. So we parted ways at the entrance to the Grand Lodge and I waked a couple more blocks and into the main lobby of the Convention Center. This is when it hit me… I hadn’t walked through those doors since Fan Fest right before the 1996 MLB All-Star Game. Wow, nearly twenty years.

The networking before the awards dinner was the usual affair with many of us catching up with various companies from the area and reconnecting with those we met last month during Philly Tech Week. Before we knew it (partly because it took so many of us to get into the city and find parking), we were heading up the escalators and finding our seats. While I preferred the venue from last year (Valley Forge Casino) the format for the evening made much more sense combining the awards with dinner (although it would have been nice to have an option other than salmon).

As most awards programs do, the evening ran quite a bit longer than expected and we didn’t start clearing out of the building until well after 10pm. Overall, there were come really interesting companies, nice acceptance speeches, a great recognition ceremony, and a couple of people that should never be asked to speak publicly again (they should have had the music ready for some of the acceptances like at the Oscars). But, we all parted ways having reconnected for an evening and hoping to stay in touch a little more over the next year. At the very least, there are a few more people that I will be certain to say hello to next year at the next awards banquet.

Reconnecting In A New Way

It has been a bit crazy lately with everything that has been going on. If you look back at the most recent crop of posts you can easily figure out why. Adding to all of this is the fact that I am hearing from people on Facebook that I haven’t had conversations with in quite some time. If it happened at any other point it would seem odd but the simple fact of the matter is that as soon as you post the first picture of your new baby (which we keep to a minimum) people come out of the woodwork.

This influx of communications has been great. It has been the perfect excuse to restart conversations and see how people are doing. As many people, family and friends, can attest I am not the greatest when it comes to staying in touch. I am rather sporadic in reaching out to people as there is usually one thing or another that comes up and steals my attention. I am not nearly as bad as I used to be but I am by no means where I would like to be. This is proving to be a tremendous opportunity to fix that at least a little bit.

Social media has always been an issue for me as it is part of my daily work routine so by the time I get out of the office I am kind of done with it. As has been evident, much of my usage of Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter has been largely one way rather than the dialogue that it is meant to be. This is why I included the screen shot at the top of this post. This is what social media is supposed to do… it is an alternative means of communication.

With that said, it is still difficult to combine the work and personal and social media is one of those places where I still see it as work. Maybe it is for this reason, or the fact that I am still a traditionalist, that I prefer talking to someone on the phone or writing a letter (an actual letter not email). Those are the places where I can disconnect from work even though I still use each of them during the course of the day.

Social media is where I still have the issue of being able to disconnect but the recent discussions I have had have gone a long way to alleviate that issue. In the end, don’t be surprised if I am not as responsive as most people on social media… I spend too much time on it getting work done for clients and by the end of the day I tend to ignore those sites. Plus, I have seen the good and bad sides of these social sites and I tend to limit much of what I put on there (believe it or not). This is now particularly true as it pertains to my son. However, if you want to catch up and/or talk about the baby feel free to give me a call, write a letter, or send an email.