Saturday, October 11, 2014

Not Earned Or Expected

Since the crux of this post revolved around a single word, let’s first take a look at the definition (as it is used in the post below) of the word compliment:

a :  an expression of esteem, respect, affection, or admiration; especially :  an admiring remark
b :  formal and respectful recognition :  honor

While a wonderful word, I don’t feel I have ever earned a compliment as it is defined. Best case scenario, it is questionable as to whether I should have gotten any. I know many people who have but, in my view, I don’t believe the definition applies to me.

Lately, there have been a number of people saying similarly kind comments to me and each time I kept asking myself why it was said. After all, I was going my job the way I think it needs to be done… the way it needs to be done in order to be impactful. In other instances, I was just doing what should be done when a friend or family member is in need. I have no problem giving compliments but when it comes to receiving them I am really not a fan. This is particularly true when I feel that I am being praised for what I see as doing my job. With that said, I know it is the right thing to do and I appreciate it when people take the time to said such flattering things or thank me but I don’t expect it.

Unfortunately, I have seen too many times over the last few years of people expecting this type of praise as if they are entitled to it. Mostly this has been found in the young newly graduated just entering the work force thinking that they are right and that their company and colleagues are wrong. These are the kinds of people that expect to be applauded for farting in a tuba and staying on key.

Thankfully, I take pride in the fact that I have been able to surround myself at work, at lodge, and in my family with countless people who feel the same way that I do about compliments. After all, when we help someone it is more gratifying for us to see that person succeed. We know the small role that we have played in their life and that is more than enough for us. Of course, with all of that said, a simple thank you (privately, not publically) goes a long way. This is also something that seems to be lost on many young people (whether it is actual age or just mentally) as they expect to be thanked for introducing us to the world of tuba tooting.