TMI Tuesday: Daddy Kisses!

A few months ago, while trying to get our son to sound out a few new words, I would pick him up and ask, “Can you say, ‘Daddy, I love you’?” While the first couple of times that I did this there wasn’t much of a reaction and maybe only a few mumbles of a baby babble but, over time, this changed. One morning before sitting him at the table for breakfast, I posed the same question and got a response I wasn’t expecting. He didn’t say anything, rather he leaned over and gave daddy a big, and very wet, kiss on the lips.

This is not something that he had done but only a couple of times previously, before this he simply did not give daddy kisses. This became almost a daily routine for us as I would ask him the same question and our son giving me the same response. Frankly, I kept hoping for the words but was completely happy with the alternative. There were even some instances when, without me saying a word, he would walk over to me in the playroom just to give me a kiss.  

What came as a surprise shortly after this all started was that I didn’t even have to be present for our son to react this way. When driving home from the office one night I asked the question hoping that he may try to sound out the words but, instead, he took hold of the phone and gave it a big kiss and giggled. Again, this has also become part of our weekday routine.

However, a couple of weeks ago the kisses stopped. Our son no longer wants to give hugs and kisses as frequently as he once did. I guess the phase has passed. As we have been told many times over, enjoy the moments when they happen. While the in person affection has slowed, our son has maintained his phone response and continues to kiss and hug the phone when asked the simple question.

In place of the physical responses, now the words are becoming a much more prevalent part of our days with some clearer than others. We still working on the same question we were before, he is now making a more concerted effort to sound it out. While this was the original impetus for my query a few months back I now find myself missing those moments when my son would give me a big kiss as if to say “of course I love you daddy.”

And The Phone Rings Again…

Another week and another unpleasant phone call. I was in the middle of my workday when my phone rang out from my shirt pocket and when I pulled it out and looked at the screen an unknown number was displayed on my caller ID. After the second or third ring, I answered the call not really knowing what to expect as I have made so many calls the past several weeks that it could have been a call from any number of companies or publications. Well, as Monty Brewster would say, it was from none of the above. It was, in fact, one of those call that I dread but also comes with being the Secretary of the lodge… another brother has been called off from labor.

Unfortunately, over the past few years I have spoken with a variety of funeral homes in the area as well as families of brothers who have been called off from labor. It is never an easy conversation. In fact, it is just as difficult now as it was the first time I answered one of these calls. After all, we are losing a brother not just a number in our membership… a member of our lodge, our masonic family, is no longer with us and all that knowledge that they had attained is forever silent.  

However, I am appreciative of the opportunity that the family has given us to honor our brother one final time. Too often I have found myself finding about a brother’s passing long after the fact. I consider the request to conduct a Masonic Funeral Service as a gift from our departed brother and his family to big farewell and thank him one final time for being a member of our fraternal family for over 65 years. The least we can do is honor this final request.

It is with great melancholy that I write this knowing that these events will be repeated again and again as our brothers continue to advance in age. It is a sequence of events that has become near ritual in recent years. However, as we hear of each brother being called off from labor, we can look to our lodges and see our new brethren take those initial steps in Freemasonry. The same steps that our departed brother took decades prior when their journey was just beginning. Such is the cycle of life and how we honor our brothers past, present, and future.

Too Many Departures

While nothing has been as difficult as the loss that we experienced early last year, there have been moments since then that have forced me to stop for a minute and think about the people that have been a part of my life, large and small, over the years. I found myself going through this process once again when I received an email about the passing of a fellow Rotarian’s wife. Oddly enough, I had just seen him last week and, by the end of the meeting, wondered why I hadn’t asked how his family was doing as I normally would have. I guess even these seemingly inconsequential lapses happen for a reason.

I recall meeting his wife a couple of times in the past at Rotary functions and I recall having some very interesting discussions with her on a variety of subject. It was safe to say that there were a number of topics that we didn’t agree on but I remember having a pleasant conversation during which it was abundantly clear that I was discussing these subjects with a highly intelligent and informed woman. I guess you could say that she and her husband were very similar in that regard.

This loss is only one of many that has happened over the past year or so from those that I remember fondly seeing nearly every day in high school as was the case with the passing of my homeroom teacher and other times there are people that I had either met only a few times or that I had only corresponded with through letters, emails, or over the phone. Each time I was brought back to those discussions and encounters leaving me wondering why I hadn’t picked up the phone or wrote them a letter lately. I guess it is normal to think about the conversations you never had rather than the ones you did.

Of course, then there are the family members who have passed before I had a chance to talk to them or even really got to know them. Admittedly, there is a little selfishness in this thought but it also speaks to the unexpected, and potential, impact of those who have passed. While this has unfortunately been happening for years, it is a regular occurrence even today. However, the same lesson applies here as well… I need to do a better job of keeping in touch and reaching out to friends and family members. After all, as has been proven time and again, you never know how long you really have.

Mortgage Monday: More Estimates

Whenever work needs to be done at the house that is beyond my limited capabilities, it is rarely a simple process to get that job done. Early last week I was finally able to set aside the time research some of the contractors and other service providers in the area. Home Advisor was actually a pretty useful tool for this in addition to work of mouth and local publications. We have had our project list pulled together for some time now and I did receive a couple of estimates for a few things that we need done but I am never one to settle for a single quote. So, with a break in the chaos of the week, I pulled together a list and got on the phone making dozens of calls and leaving a multitude of messages. With all the research done and calls placed, the rest of the week was filled with fielding responses to my queries.

The first set of calls that I placed was to some of the reputable tree service companies in the area. There are at least three trees that need to be taken down around the property and probably a few others that will need to come down in the near future. Heading into this initial investigation I knew that this is an expensive proposition as a couple of the trees are at least a hundred feet high and not in an easy location on the property. Additionally, at least one of them is so far gone that scaling in the trunk is not going to be a possibility. Of all the companies I called I was only able to get a hold of one of them who stopped by the house on Friday and delivered an unofficial estimate at a figure that I was in line with my thought process.

The next call was to a company to replace our garage doors. While one is still serviceable the other door is useless at this point and given the age of both it just makes sense to replace the pair (as well as the motors). Again, I already have a quote for this project but it is definitely one that I believe can be beat by, hopefully, a significant margin. This is one of the companies that I will have stopping by the house this week.

The last group of correspondences were to a few of the recommended general contracting firms and smaller craftsmen in the area. The one recommendation that I did receive to install some doors to my office was booked… and when I say booked I mean that he didn’t have an opening in his calendar until February 2017. A couple of the other companies I contact gave me a call later in the week and will be coming out to the house this week as well. It is definitely going to be busy around the house with all of these people coming and going but at least I will have a few sets of numbers to work with.

Mortgage Monday: Where’s The Warranty?

Over the course of the past several months since we purchased our home, there have been a few things here and there that we have found that need replacing. Nothing major at this point but all items that we are trying to address in as timely a manner as we can manage at this point. Of course, there is also a process that we must follow when assessing each of these minor issues the first step is to assess our home warranty to see if any of these items are covered. This, as should be a surprise to no one, involves scanning a lot of fine print and numerous phone calls to clarify the coverage of some items.

The first issue that we encountered shortly after moving in was the self-destruction of our garage door… no one told us it was made by Mission Impossible Brands. It was a simple matter of a single bolt coming loose but it was enough to grenade the door. And, of course, it is something not covered under the warranty. So it remains one of the small but annoying items on our list of things that we need to address in the coming months.

It is the little things such as this that just seem to add up and it is never a small item that is included in the fine print of the home warranty. The wording is almost clairvoyant in the way is side steps many of the minor issues that we have encountered. While nothing is of great significance and would be considered an annoyance more than anything, they all add up as more and more small items turns into a rather large list.

And, right now, we are only in the very beginning of this process. As many of you know, all of the little quirks and minor repairs usually pop up within the first year… we are only half way there. I can see a few things that may be problematic in the coming months and have already started checking for warranty coverage. Our luck could turn in this regard but we won’t really know until we try to use it. However, we can’t lose sight of the simple fact that this remains a solid house.

There are many issues that I have heard about from others that are nowhere to be found in our home. Again, the ‘issues’ that we have encountered are very minor and it shouldn’t be an issue making these small adjustments, changes, and repairs. As was written about before, the optional list is something completely different. But, so far, things are good and we will make the necessary modifications… one project at a time.

Catching Up On Correspondences

My lodge email has been rather active lately with correspondences not only from brothers from the lodge and the district but from Grand Lodge and potential candidates as well. This is in addition to what has become an abnormally busy beginning to the year more so than the previous two years. While I do my best to keep current with all inbound communications it has gotten to the point that there are moments when I find myself a few days behind and having to sit in front of the computer at night drafting email after email in the hope that I will be caught up by morning. Keep in mind that this is in addition to the calls and texts that I receive. 

However, given the nature of the letters and notes that I have received, I can’t really complain about the work that needs to be done on a regular basis. I wouldn’t be sifting through the digital pages were we not growing and increasing our activity. These are great signs for the future and speaks volumes of the present group of brothers that are active in the fraternity. With that in mind, keep the emails coming.

On the other hand, I know that many of the emails that I receive wouldn’t have even been sent if I were able to make it to the lodge every week so some of the clutter is completely on me. I simply can’t be two places at once and this is what I need to do to keep things going. Actually, come to think of it, I get more frustrated with the lack of communication from some people every now and again. This adds significantly to the work that I need to get done and the emails that need to be sent out as it is no longer a means of replying but reminding, starting, or restarting a conversation.

And the work continues to pile up on my virtual desk as there are a few other tasks that need to be completed this spring including various audits the biggest of which, for me, are going to be the membership and records audits ensuring that our numbers are accurate and all our information has been correctly migrated to the new site. This could possibly be the task that I am least looking forward to but I know that it has to be done by the spring. I expect many corrections, correspondences, and long nights to stem from this endeavor as well. But, right now, I am going to focus on projects that need to be taken care of before the meeting next week.

A New Batch Of Solicitors

When my wife and I first discussed buying our first home we agreed that it would be nice to finally have a landline again. For the past several years, with the impermanence of renting, it was simply easier just using our cell phones for everything that we needed. Having that simple luxury was hugely representative of the permanence that we have both been seeking for some time. When we bought our home it was one of the first things that we had set up and while it did give us that feeling that we have been looking for there have also been brief moment of regret for doing so.

Throughout our first month in our new home, the phone would ring at least a couple of times a day. Many times, fortunately, the calls came in when we were both at work but there have also been plenty of other calls, usually right after we put our son to bed, from various companies trying to sell us one thing or another. This also included many companies wanting us to switch our newly connected services or ADT resellers with whom the fact that we already had ADT installed didn’t quite register. One conversation went something like this:

“Hi, my name is Joe with [insert reseller] and we have some great deals on ADT home security systems…”

“You’re wasting your time… we already took care of this.”

“Congratulations on your new home… are you and your family protected by ADT?”

“We had ADT installed last weekend.”

“But ADT provides a superior product and service…”

“It is an ADT system.”

“But ADT is the leader in the security industry…”

“We had an ADT system installed last weekend”

“Are you sure it was ADT because there are knockoffs?”

“Okay, you got me, I just have a stray dog chained outside the front door with a GoPro streaming to my laptop. Please don’t tell PETA.”

“What?”

“Do you think that qualifies as animal cruelty?”

“I… I…”

“I feed him regularly and clean up after him. Heck, I even took him to the vet. I figured I would make it easy on everyone so I decided to name him ADT.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about sir. I’m Joe from ADT.”

“I know. And now that you’re listening I will reiterate. We had ADT installed last weekend. Please add this number to your do not call list.”

However, those were not the most exhausting calls. We also received a few interesting calls from service providers that don’t even offer service to our area… someone at Verizon needs to get a clue as we would have kept our service had it been offered at our new place. Can’t say I was quite as jovial as I was with the ADT guy but the conversation ended the same way… “Please add this number to your do not call list.”

While I understand and appreciate the fact that many of these people are just trying to make a living, the sheer volume of these calls has become ridiculous. Having the same company call four or five times a day for weeks on end is harassment. And, of course, they don’t leave a message nor do they even know what they are talking about when they call. Case in point being an electric provider that was “concerned to see that our electric bill from [insert name of power provider that we don’t use here] had increased so much over the previous month.” First of all, I call BS. Second, put me on your do not call list, goodbye!

TMI Tuesday: I Want To Talk To Daddy NOW!

Part of my daily routine is calling my wife while on my way home after work. I have done this for a while and in the past it wasn’t as regular as it has become over the past year. Of course, now my wife and I have little say as to whether my phone is going to ring while I am getting on the highway.

Every day, so I have been told, when my wife picks our son up from work he babbles in the back seat saying “da da” over and over again as if it has become his infant mantra. This usually continues for much of the afternoon (and sometimes into the night) until he finally gets to the point when he reaches for my wife’s phone, says “da da”, and waves. He may only be ten months old but he has no issues getting his message across… I want to talk to dada now!

This is pretty much the same routine regardless of whether he is having a good day or a bad day and sometimes, for some reason, hearing my voice on the phone is one of the few things that will calm him down. However, consider yourself warned, if he is expecting to talk to daddy and you decide to call, he will not readily accept this and will be rather vocal about his displeasure. I am told that it is an interesting site to behold when the voice on the other end of the line is not that of his daddy… basically, imagine being cursed out in baby babble.

Of course, I am of two minds when I think about this routine that we have and the close relationship that I have been able to build with our son. While he knows my voice and he looks forward to seeing me every night, I am usually only able to spend anywhere between 30 and 60 minutes with him per day. And that is if I don’t have anything going on that night. This is why I am happy to have the relationship that we do but, at the same time, I don’t like the fact that I see him for such a small amount of time.

It’s almost as if I can hear Harry Chapin warming up back stage letting me know that I am walking a fine line. He is ready to go and can start singing at any time if I screw up. That is the last thing that I want to happen and why when I am home I give my son as much attention as I am able, play with him, and tell him I love him whenever I am given the chance. It may not be ideal but, so far, it is seems to maintain the strength of our connection.

Email Surprise

I got a bit of a surprise when I checked my lodge email yesterday afternoon. What I thought was going to be a simple message making an appeal to the brethren to attend the fellowship night was something that caught me off guard. The first half of the email stated almost exactly what I expected to read but the second half changed things up a bit notifying those in receipt of the email that all furniture and files were being moved out of the Secretary’s office that night. This was clearly the first time that I was hearing about this clean out.

While this is something that we have discussed many times over the past couple of years, I was not aware of this tasking being scheduled so soon. In my position I hear about a lot of the things happening at the lodge but every once in a while I hear something either right before it happens or immediately after the fact. The problem isn’t necessarily in what is taking place but in being prepared when someone comes to me with questions. At the office and at the lodge, my job requires me to know what is going on and when there is a break in communication, issues like we have had over the past year begin popping up and, as a result, my phone begins to ring regularly.

It seems as though we have gone from one extreme to the other. While there were many plans and little action in the past, now there is plenty of action but few plans to be found now. This is obviously not the entire picture but there is no reason why this should have happened so abruptly and why the first time many of us are hearing about these plans is a mere few hours before we were all to converge on the lodge.

When I read the email the second time I was both happy that something was being done but also annoyed that this could cause more issues and work for me in the near future. And while I don’t like to miss moments like this and evenings at the lodge in general I am actually glad that I wasn’t feeling well yesterday and that I opened the email with the intent of informing the brother who sent it that I would not be in attendance. After an uncomfortable night it is now time to wait and try to put the pieces together through a variety of phone calls and conversations. Hopefully, this goes smoother than similar situations in the past.

Moving Day Recovery

As soon as we got out of bed yesterday the long and hectic day started. We had a lot of appointments scheduled and, needless to say, a lot of work ahead of us. Yesterday was moving day and that was not the only task that needed to be accomplished… we also had an ADT consultation in the morning, Raymour & Flanigan delivering furniture by noon, and the cable company coming out to the house to get our phone, internet, and cable up and running by the end of the day. While I was taking care of those tasks, my wife was at work, our son was at daycare, and my parents were supervising the sluggish movers.

With all of these things set to a certain schedule, my wife and I got up a little earlier than usual, got our son ready for ‘school’ and were about to head out the door when my parents arrived. Actually, while my wife was changing, feeding, and generally getting our son ready, I was busy finishing up the remaining packing around the house and making sure that every box we purchased was being used. By the time I stopped to take a breath we must have had over 100 boxes stacked in the various rooms all labeled with their new locations at our home.

By the time I finished putting things aside, closing off all the rooms that the movers didn’t need to address, and coordinating the day with my parents I was already behind schedule and ADT was calling just as I was about to get in the car and head over to the house. Fortunately, the woman with whom I was working was very understanding of the situation and had the patience to wait for me until I arrived about 15 minutes after our originally agreed upon appointment time. Just before we completed the walk through of the house for the quote, the furniture arrived and we officially began the transformation from house to home.

ADT left shortly thereafter and, just like it was planned, the cable company arrived and began work immediately. Thankfully, I remembered to bring a television, my laptop, and a phone with me that morning to test. By mid afternoon, all the furniture was in place, the cable, internet, and phone were up and running, and I already had the quote from ADT in hand. All that was left was waiting for the lackadaisical movers to arrive.

Needless to say, we were not happy with how long it took the moving company to get things done. While I did get them to move a bit faster upon arrival it still took them until 8:30 to get things done, close up the truck, and leave all of their trash behind (I will be checking for damage over the next few days). Today was largely spend cleaning up after them and moving many of the clearly labeled boxes into the correct rooms. But, the important thing, regardless of the issues that we encountered, is the fact that we are now home! Let the recovery begin.

Paint Chips And Poor Customer Service

I readily admit that I am frequently not the easiest person to deal with. This is especially true when it comes to customer service calls. I do my best and have even made a more concerted effort as of late to be as nice and understanding as possible when I have to participate in these calls but sometimes it is really hard to keep my cool. I have been dealing with such a situation for the past two weeks as our insurance company which has had a tremendous track record personally has completely mucked up just about everything that I have called about and/or requested over the past month.

Thankfully, I have been able to keep my temper under control throughout this whole process but my patience is running thinner than [insert your cliche or original thought here]. And it hasn’t really been a matter of incompetence… as time goes on it seems to be more and more about laziness. I have made numerous efforts to communicate through email as well as by phone and I have even coordinated a time to speak with someone. When it came time for them to call at the time they promised, my phone failed to ring and no attempt at following up or explaining what had happened was ever made.

It has been a rather frustrating time especially knowing what exceptional experiences I have had with this insurance company in the past. Up until a few weeks ago I have had nothing but good things to say about this company but lately I have had to measure my words a bit given the last few people with whom I have had the displeasure of communicating (or lack thereof). And just think, this is without me getting angry, abrasive, or even difficult. I have done everything I can, within reason, to accommodate the company but have, as of today, nothing to show for it.

I would consider changing my insurance company but I have yet to see any rates anywhere near what we are paying. And I have given just about every agent and company a chance whenever they have popped up. It used to be great service and great rates and now it seems as though I am left with just the latter of the two. What’s even worse is that the most recent conversations with the insurance company they have tried to hard sell me all of their other offering before allowing me to resume my day. They may want to get better at their current job, complete their existing task, before even thinking about trying to sell me anything. And yes, I remained calm.

Changes Still Pending

Another month has already passed and I am finding myself in a slightly better situation than before the last stated meeting. The notice is just about done and should be out in a day or two, the minutes will be completed by the end of the week, and various communications have already been taken care of. Of course, there are always the lingering items, emails, and letters that will surely persist up until the moment we all converge upon the lodge but that is just part of the routine.

However, there is a pattern that has carried over from the summer. One that I am not too happy about and will have to be addressed again. The bills remain unpaid and checks still need to be drafted. We didn’t have a full roster of officers at the last stated which prevented us from taking care of these essential items in a timely manner and now, later in the month, our schedules are completely out of sync and the communication which we rely so heavily upon has dwindled.

There are moments when I really don’t know what else to do. Time is something that I have very little of and the lack of consistency from month to month is wreaking havoc on my calendar. After a long day at the office I just want to get home and spend time with my wife and son. This is why I have all of my meetings at the lodge and other gatherings scheduled well in advance. It would be one thing to have our meetings on some other consistent night during the month but the jumping from block to block on the calendar is not something that works for me.

We have addressed this exact issue in the past, several times actually, and have put forth a plan to get things done on time but, as of today, there is no change. It won’t be long before I once again have to field numerous calls from the brethren regarding this issue. It may seem like a minor glitch to some and it was at first but not it is a major problem and one that has at time had me seriously considering stepping down at the end of the year. The only things that have stopped me have been the encouragement of other brothers and the simple fact that there are many more aspects of this office that I enjoy compared to those that bother me.

Hopefully the next few days / weeks / months will bring about a change for the better and those fleeting thoughts will fly away (at least for an extended period of time). I guess we will just have to continue waiting and see what happens… hopefully my phone doesn’t start ringing again. In the meantime, there is just over a week to go before the next stated meeting and I have a job to do.   

Monday Morning Puking and Crying

It was an interesting way to start the week as I was fortunate to join my wife for our son’s six month at the pediatrician’s office down the street. We did our best to schedule the appointment early enough so that this would be a possibility and, up until Friday afternoon last week, this was seeming more like an impossibility… thankfully an important meeting got moved without me having to say anything. So, with everything working out logistically, instead of arriving at the office around ten until nine, we were walking into the waiting room watching our son turning his head back and forth trying to take everything in.

Now, I have to be honest about what I feel as we walk into these appointments (beyond the feelings of frustration when they take way too long). I have mixed emotions about going to these appointments. On the one hand I want to support my wife and be there for my son while on the other, selfish hand, I can’t stand seeing my baby boy crying in pain.

While I wouldn’t say that he is happy to be there, he has at least gotten to the point where he tolerates going to see the doctor and he is actually pretty happy and smiling at everyone until one of two things happens... being naked or getting shots. He wasn’t even phased when he threw up on me taking him to the scale or throwing up on my wife as she was bringing him back to the examination room. He is an equal opportunity chucker.

Even with the spewing, it was fun watching my wife’s when the doctor confirmed that he was only half a pound away from 20 and well on his way to being taller than mommy. He is a big boy but, more importantly, he is a healthy baby and one that surprised the doctor by what he is already able to do. While there are a few areas where he is not really excelling in (not really behind either), the doctor was surprised at how advanced his hand eye coordination had become as well as his ability to self sooth.

All of that pretty much went to pot once the vaccine and needles came out. In addition to the nasty taste in him mouth he also left the appointment with two sore legs. But now he is all ready for day care although I don’t think that my wife and I are fully ready for that change as of yet. However, I will say that this time around he calmed down much faster and the tears stopped by the time we walked back around to the front desk. Needless to say, it was a tiring morning for all of us and afterward my wife and son went back home while I made some phone calls on my way to the office.

Shifting And Adjusting

The past week has been rather interesting regarding the phone calls that I have received. It began last week with a call from a trustee regarding one of the utility bills that we recently paid. It was just a matter of double checking that everything was taken care of and, honestly, I appreciate the personal interest that this brother, and many others like him, take in the lodge. They just want to see the lodge continue to grow and return to prominence… they have been and continue to be the gate keepers.

After a brief conversation I told him that I would double check and give the service provider a call just to make sure that everything was good to go. As soon as I hung up I immediately scrolled through my email, found the representative’s number, and gave her a call. As expected, everything was good so I thanked her for her time and got back to my usual work.

About 20 or 30 minutes later I got a call from an unfamiliar yet familiar number. I answered in my usual way and was surprised to hear the same voice on the other end of the line that I had just heard a half hour ago. I guess she really appreciated the call as it turns out that she did a little crunching of the numbers and was calling me back to offer a 40% reduction in our rate. Same exact service from the same company for 40% less… that was a no brainer. I like these kinds of calls.

The other phone call I received was on Monday morning as I was on my way to work (a little later than usual). With our Red Cross blood drive scheduled for October I was wondering when I would be receiving the materials. This call put a little kink in that planning as they are currently experiencing a ‘good problem’ in that there are more people wanting drives that weekend then they have staff. The call was simply to ask us if we could move our drive. I can’t answer that one on the spot so I had to agree to call her back… in the end, the drive is moving from October to December.

Not ideal but sometimes doing the right thing isn’t the most convenient. Actually, for me it works out well in that I will be able to support one of my fellow brothers on the day that the drive was originally scheduled… I was wondering how I could accomplish both that day. So, sometimes things work out for the best even if they aren’t exactly what you were planning to happen. Hopefully, this is the end of the interesting phone calls for a while… actually, never mind, I hope I get more calls about reducing rates. Those are easy calls.

First Trip To Lancaster County

We were finally able to take advantage of not having to be anywhere today. It had been some time since our son had an opportunity to play with his cousins, nearly a month in fact, so earlier in the week we coordinated with my sister to bring our son over to her house for the first time. It actually wasn’t a bad ride from our place into the heart of Lancaster County and our son was able to sleep for a few minutes right before our arrival. We got there around noon and almost immediately our little boy was looking around at this new place wondering where the heck we were.

Soon after we pulled in and as I was giving my brother-in-law a quick tour of the new car, my sister pulled into the driveway and started unpacking the groceries. It didn’t take long for my niece to climb out of the passenger seat and start doting over her baby cousin. It is great to watch the connection that the two of them have. My niece can’t seem to get enough of him and our son just keeps smiling whenever they are playing.

Spending the day with family was good for all of us. It got our son out of the house (he prefers being out and about as opposed to relaxing at home), it got us out of the house, and it afforded us an opportunity to catch up with family. We all have a lot going on right now and sometimes phone calls and text messages can only cover so much. It was also good because my wife and I could go do our separate things while we were there. She was able to sit and talk while my sister and niece watched our son, and I was able to help with putting up a gate outside.

While we did a few things separately we also came together to watch the kids on the swing, play some tetherball, and relaxing in the warm summer sunset. By the time we sat down for dinner we were amazed at how fast the day had drifted by. We were all getting a little tired and so we got back on the road almost eight hours after we arrived. It wasn’t long before our son was sleeping and we were back at the house putting him in bed. Of course, one we put him upstairs it hit us just how much work we still have to do at the house. Another project for another day.

Milestones And Oatmeal

Earlier today my wife randomly called me in the middle of the day. My first thought when I saw her number come up on the screen was that something was wrong or she was having a rough day. It was actually the complete opposite. It turns out that our son reached a milestone today. These are the calls I look forward to receiving.

He has been slowly getting used to the concept of tummy time over the last month. While still not his favorite thing to do, he is at least tolerating it and has even made tremendous progress in his strength and general awareness in this position. Today he decided to change things up once he got tired of tummy time. Instead of getting upset and waiting for mommy to pick him up he took matters into his own hands and rolled over.

It is amazing to think how much things have changed over the past five months. Not just the daily routines that my wife and I now have but in how much our son has grown. Even just looking at the last month, since my last similar post, there are a number of changes that have happened and milestones that have been reached. His personality continues to develop and shines through regularly… poor kid is turning more and more into his daddy.

This past month we have also started feeding him solids. He didn’t go for it right away but once he got used to the taste and routine, he seems to enjoy his breakfast oatmeal each morning. Thankfully, we usually only see the oatmeal once now. Even while on vacation, we continued this part of his daily routine. Given how much he continues to grow seemingly every day, it is a needed addition to his diet. It was actually quite the surprise to see how much he changed from the time we departed for Virginia to the time we arrived back home.

There have certainly been a few hectic and tying days, especially with all the other things that others are expecting from my wife, but he continues to be a good baby. Generally, he tends to just go with things and take the day as it unfolds; he enjoys being out and exploring; he is always smiling and continues to sleep ten or more hours per night; and he only gets fussy or cries when there is a good reason for it. It is safe to say that we really got lucky!

Lodge Via Email

This is actually pretty similar to what the lodge computer looks like. 

The past week has been a bit of a blur with countless emails having passed by my eyes. We may not have our next meeting until September but the work most certainly has continued. It actually might be the most emails that I have received in a single week between the canceled fellowship last Tuesday to my inability to attend this evening. With not being able to make it there tonight, this means that, due to other commitments, I will not walk through the doors of the lodge for at least another two weeks.

No worries, everyone knows that I am accessible at all times. Sometimes there are periods when we can’t make it to the lodge especially those of us that neither live nor work in the area. Things will continue to move forward without my presence because the lodge, as many of you know, can’t be run by a single man. There are numerous brothers that make the lodge work and ensure that things move along smoothly. No one person needs to be there.

With that said, it is nice to be able to catch up and make sure that various projects are being taken care of. We all check with one another and make sure that the tasks that we set out to accomplish are completed. This is why I get so many emails from within the lodge, the district, and from other lodges across the commonwealth. We all check in on one another, offer assistance, and seek advice on various problems and projects. We work together as a single, unified, fraternity.

However, nights like this I do miss driving down to the lodge and meeting with the brethren. The fellowship is something that I continue to look forward to each and every time that I am able to participate. This has only been amplified over the last couple of years with the increased involvement of new and old brothers alike. It is a great time at the lodge and a great time to catch up on life.

But everyone knows, no matter how active you are in the lodge, you have to have a balanced life. I am still working to find that balance between family, work, and the lodge. Modern communication does help in this regard but it is still far from perfect. I don’t think this is going to be taken off of my list of things that I need to work on in the foreseeable future. But, I will continue to measure my days and do my best to balance my hours.

How Is Time Moving So Fast?

It has been an amazing month watching our son learn new things, grow, and begin to understand more of the world around him. There have been a few instances that have tested our patience especially with regard to the reflux but, overall, we couldn’t have asked for a happier or loving baby. And seeing him in the morning and when I get home at night are what really completes my day. Seeing that smile on his face when I walk in the door, seemingly saying “hi daddy”, never gets old and lets me forget about anything that may have been bothering me during the day.

While he is not yet found any interest in rolling over (or being on his belly for that matter), he is still doing things that are still amazing when I think about the fact that he is only 4 months old today. In addition to his enjoyment of being on his feet with little support from mommy or daddy, he also just started sitting up by himself. They may only be for a few seconds at a time but it is much more than many babies his age.  

He has found a new interest in the various toys that have been sent to us or that we have picked up over the past few months. While he still prefers his ball which we have tethered to his car seat, he is also enjoying the car keys and some of the other things that we have bought. Unfortunately, he has also figured out how to throw things. He also enjoys pushing the buttons on mommy’s cell phone when she is talking to daddy. The big toys are proving to be very useful as well as we can now put him in the exersaucer where he is perfectly content playing with everything around him and making the train go around the track.

While I have had to tell him for months whether or not I would be home late in the evening, he is now responding to more and more of what we are saying. He knows his name (he will learn the importance of his name later) and is able to respond to some of the simple requests that we make like to hold on when we pick him. He is now a fully interactive child (not like the creepy one in AI) with each day more interesting than the next.

I am sure that I have forgotten a variety of things that have happened and developments that have occurred over the past month but that should give you a basic idea. It is quite the ride that we are on and one that keeps getting better with every dip and turn. And even though there is a lot of puking and crapping of pants, it is still a ride that we are so glad and thankful that we got on. Happy 4 months baby!

PS – Sorry in advance for the shots at the doctor’s office tomorrow.

Every Penny Is Part Of A Dollar

Over the past couple of weeks I have been taking advantage of a couple of opportunities that were presented to me in order to save a few dollars. Sometimes the numbers added up pretty fast while other times it was only a little here and there. Either way, they are all providing a little bit of a return and putting a few extra dollars back into our account. Actually, by the end of the week, all those small sums added up and turned into a rather nice return.

There were really two parts to this whole operation this week… price matching and a credit card promotion. While it did take some time this week, in the end it is going to save us hundreds if not thousands of dollars over the next year. It just goes to show that if you take a few minutes and put in a little effort, you can make things a little easier.

It started a couple of weeks ago when there were a few items that I had to purchase for the house. Not the cheapest things but not really high priced either. When I had a couple of minutes free in the middle of the work day, I pulled up the Sportsman’s Guide website to see if they had what I was looking for. It turns out that they did so I put the items in my shopping cart, typed in my coupon, and selected the 4 pay plan to ease the payment pain.

Everything went smoothly but I was curious to see if there were any other websites that were offering a better deal. Sportsman’s Guide offers a price match guarantee for 30 days from the time the order is placed. There were a few sites that had the same price, a few that were selling it for more, and a couple that were a dollar or two cheaper. I wasn’t about to call over a couple dollars. And there is was… a $25 difference. With website and item number in hand I called customer service and had the price matched within minutes. However, this was a onetime opportunity to save some money. My other call this week was more fruitful.

At some point during the day on Tuesday I got an email from a company regarding my credit card. The offer was for free transfers of other accounts (normally 3%) with a 0% APR for 1 year on those balance transfers. This particular card has the lowest interest rate so has always carried the highest balance… hence no room for transfers. So I gave them a call on Wednesday to explain the situation and to see if there was some way that I could take advantage of this offer.

It never fails whenever I call them, they found a way to make it work. Now, instead of paying a nearly 20% APR on a couple other cards, we are now paying 0% for the next year and, if needed, carry a 12% APR afterward. The percentages may not mean much at first glance but, over the course of a 12 month period this could potentially save us hundreds upon hundreds of dollars (it will also lower our monthly payments pretty significantly). I am sure that many of you may think that this is boring but it saves me money so I am very interested.

The essential thing to take away from both of these is that there are opportunities to save money / keep money in your pocket if you just pay attention. I am sure there are a number of opportunities that I have missed in the past but, in this instance, I was fortunate enough to catch them. When all is said and done, all it takes is a few minutes from you day and a willingness to work with the people on the other end of the line. It was a great week for saving money.

Well, That Was Useless!

The learning curve is steep when you have your first child and there are many instances when you are scrambling to find the answers to questions that seemingly pop out of nowhere. Sometimes you reach out to family and friends who have kids to see what advice they have and chose from one of the many options that have inevitably been offered. Other time you reach out to the professionals and either call the doctor or, as we did a number of times early on, ask the doula. Each time we listen to the advice from those people who have “been there, done that.”

Thanks to social media, we can get a plethora of opinions and answers to our questions in a very short amount of time. At least that is what I have seen on my wife’s Facebook feed as I have usually just picked up the phone or asked someone in person when I run into them. While my approach may take longer and seem outdated by many, it is how I prefer getting the answers and advice that we need. It also eliminates the “other opinions”.

I have had countless conversations and have heard the many humorous anecdotes from family and friends who used social media (mostly Twitter and Facebook; these aren’t LinkedIn conversations) when they first became parents. While they received the helpful hints, tips, advice, and answers that they were looking for they also got the opinions of those who don’t have kids but “read somewhere that this is the best thing to do” or passed along the half of the conversation that they heard 5 years ago when their friend was considering having a child. Basically, useless information… I actually heard of someone saying that you should hold your newborn upside down and lightly shake them if they get hiccups. Wow, just wow. Either they don't have kids or they're in jail. 

While I have an opinion on just about everything (I know, you’re shocked) there are certain things that I will not offer second hand advice on. This includes parenting. And I still hold fast to that as we are only 6 weeks in so I can’t really speak from experience on anything. If specifically asked, either by phone or in person, I will gladly share my experience but I can’t give advice especially when there are general posts made on social media. Maybe after we have done this more than once I might offer my opinion but I doubt it.