Monday, June 17, 2013

It’s Official, My Wife Is A Redneck!


Early on Sunday morning, toward the end of my shift, my wife stopped by the front desk before heading off to the Color Me RAD 5K walk/run to benefit the Special Olympics of Pennsylvania (you can read about her experience on her blog here). We talked for a little bit to coordinate our schedules as I pinned her registration number to the back of her clean white shirt. With our timing figured out she was on her way.

As soon as I got off from work I made my way to Fairmount Park to meet my wife at the finish line. While the park is only about 5 minutes from our apartment building, trying to find parking in Philadelphia on a normal day can be a challenge. This was only magnified by the hundreds of people from out of town, out of the state (especially those from New Jersey and New York), and flocks of teenagers and college students.

As expected, a 5 minute drive was punctuated by a 30 minute search for a parking spot. To say it was annoying is an understatement and many deserving expletives were used to describe members of the motorized herd. With the car parked in the gutter I made my way to the start/finish line.

It wasn’t hard to figure out which direction to walk as there was a thick pink haze enveloping the main area that was supposed to be my destination. That was not going to work for me and I quickly responded to a text from my wife and changed our meeting spot to a less lung filling area.


As I watched people walking by having finished the 5k it was interesting to see the reactions on people’s faces. Most were walking back chatting with others and smiling through the colors caked on their faces while a few people had eyes that seemed to question what the heck just happened with expressions of disgust like they had just tried to snort a rainbow. As I waited for my wife I was hoping that she was feeling more like the former rather than the later.

I caught a glimpse of her as she walked across the street to where I was standing. Feeling a little dirty but with a smile beaming on her face, she was crusted with color but she seemed to have had a lot of fun and happy that she participated. In the end, that is all that is really important to me. I just want my wife to be happy.

This was when we began to assess the mess which was the most entertaining part of the morning for me because as she removed her glasses and her bandana interesting patterns of demarcation were revealed. What really got me laughing was when she turned around and I looked at the back of her head. When she did that we discovered the fact that my wife, who has spent her entire life living in the city and suburbs, was now a redneck and a happy one at that.

Maybe next year I will have to walk with her. I am always up for some redneck fun. Stay tuned.