First Trip To Lancaster County

We were finally able to take advantage of not having to be anywhere today. It had been some time since our son had an opportunity to play with his cousins, nearly a month in fact, so earlier in the week we coordinated with my sister to bring our son over to her house for the first time. It actually wasn’t a bad ride from our place into the heart of Lancaster County and our son was able to sleep for a few minutes right before our arrival. We got there around noon and almost immediately our little boy was looking around at this new place wondering where the heck we were.

Soon after we pulled in and as I was giving my brother-in-law a quick tour of the new car, my sister pulled into the driveway and started unpacking the groceries. It didn’t take long for my niece to climb out of the passenger seat and start doting over her baby cousin. It is great to watch the connection that the two of them have. My niece can’t seem to get enough of him and our son just keeps smiling whenever they are playing.

Spending the day with family was good for all of us. It got our son out of the house (he prefers being out and about as opposed to relaxing at home), it got us out of the house, and it afforded us an opportunity to catch up with family. We all have a lot going on right now and sometimes phone calls and text messages can only cover so much. It was also good because my wife and I could go do our separate things while we were there. She was able to sit and talk while my sister and niece watched our son, and I was able to help with putting up a gate outside.

While we did a few things separately we also came together to watch the kids on the swing, play some tetherball, and relaxing in the warm summer sunset. By the time we sat down for dinner we were amazed at how fast the day had drifted by. We were all getting a little tired and so we got back on the road almost eight hours after we arrived. It wasn’t long before our son was sleeping and we were back at the house putting him in bed. Of course, one we put him upstairs it hit us just how much work we still have to do at the house. Another project for another day.

I Lied For A Good Reason…

The past couple of weeks have been difficult for me. Not because of anything bad or some of the other things that I have previously written about, it has been difficult because nearly every time I spoke with my sister I had to lie to her. I usually call my sister once a week, sometimes more if there is something going on or being planned, and so I didn’t want to change that routine. However, it was not easy to find things to talk about when I was avoiding talking about any plans for this weekend… I think I even lied to her on her birthday.

From the beginning we knew it would be a challenge but when my brother-in-law said that he wanted to do this we all, without hesitation, agreed that we would do our best to pull it off. Given her long history of finding out any and all plans (or gossip) this was no small talk, especially considering how much my nephew likes to talk. But it was all worth it when we saw her get out of the car today completely surprised, and that is not easy, that we had pulled off a surprise birthday party. Like we would simply let her 40^th birthday come and go without throwing a party.

While for much of my life I didn’t really spend a lot of time talking and really getting to know her, as I have gotten older I have learned how great of a person my sister really is. I admire how much she has accomplished and, in certain instances, overcome. While there were times that I am certain weren’t easy she never gave up and always kept moving forward. At the same time, she was always there if we really needed her for anything. Again, I may have not been aware of it at the time but it is pretty darn clear in hind sight.

And it is great to see her turning 40 at this point in her life as the party itself says a lot not just about my sister but about my brother-in-law as well. The two of them, while it took a while, were made for one another and even though my sister is a pain in his butt back, you can tell that he wouldn’t have it any other way. For how much they both do for everyone else, pulling off this celebration is the least that we could do and I am happy that we could play some, albeit very small, role in pulling it off.

Change Is Good Even With Gray Hairs!

Thursday night was a mark in time that I will never forget. I was able to watch my oldest niece graduate from High School (with Honors). I can’t really explain why but I watched from the stands with a great sense of pride as she walked across the stage (preceded and followed by intense periods of boredom). I am very happy for her and for my sister… it was a long journey for both of them and they damn well deserve this time of celebration.

This was also a night that really pointed out the fact that I am getting old. I have no idea where the time has gone and I can still clearly remember sitting with my little five year old niece on the couch one summer afternoon when I was babysitting and watching all three original Star Wars movies in a row on VHS (I think that was the last time I have seen any of them). It’s amazing how we take those simple moments for granted and how things tend to get away from us as we get older.

I’m glad that I was able to experience this before having children of my own. The last thing I want is to have my life resemble the chorus from a Harry Chapin song. By taking the time now, by understanding and embracing the importance of family, and by supporting one another during these times of celebration I hope that I am setting myself up to, eventually, being a good father.

For the time being all I can do is focus on what I have… an amazing wife, a wonderful family, and great nieces and nephews. This will continue to be my focus until things change and my wife and I are in a better position to start our own family. But events like the one on Thursday make me look forward to the future and all the experiences that are yet to come (even the ones that force my hair line to retreat).