Thy Will Be Done!

Before our son was born my wife and I had the conversation that we should really consider getting a basic will put together. It is a subject that has come up from time over the past year but there was always something that would come up to take our attention away from what needed to be done. Finally, at the last stated meeting, I was able to pull one of the brothers aside, who happens to be an estate attorney, and got his contact information. Again, it was a very simple will that we were looking for but something that we now, finally, had the time and opportunity to complete.

The impetus for getting this done really had nothing to do with our financial situation or the possibility of us owning a home in the near future. The motivation was much simpler, we want to make sure, should anything happen to us, that our son would be taken care of by those people that we believe would raise him right and would have his best interests in mind. That is really what we wanted to legally put in place leaving no question as to where he would go and who would take care of him.

The process was actually much easier than we were anticipating as my masonic brother was able to pull everything together in less than a week following my email to him with all the information (names, addresses, special requests, etc.) that were required for these basic drafts. Actually, we had two wills drawn up, one for me and one for my wife. Each mirrored the other as we have been in agreement ass to the contents from the beginning. The only difference being that, motivated by previous discussions at the lodge, I specifically requested a masonic service.

Given how easy it was, the fantastic rate which we were charged, and the simple fact that this brother will go above and beyond to assist us and offer us advice, I have already recommended is services many times over to both friends and family. So now the next stop is to the safe deposit box so that we will not have to worry about misplacing the originals. And I must say that it feels great to have this important document now completed and the worry about what we hope will never happen has now substantially subsided. We are now at ease knowing that, should something happen, our son will be taken care of and will be raised the right way.

Considering The Inevitable Future

With the baby on the way and everything else that has been going on my wife and I have been thinking about preparing for the future. While there have been many happy moments and times of celebration, there are a few realities that we must address in order for us to not have to think about certain things and unpleasant possibilities. It is with this in mind that we have started discussing putting a will together.

This is a conversation that we had when we first got married and we simply put it aside for a number of years. It wasn’t something that we would think about on a regular basis so it was simply forgotten about. Lately, it has been a thought permeating our minds and we have had to give serious consideration to many of the details.

There is nothing that has officially be done at this point… it has merely been discussion and the floating of ideas and scenarios. And while we don’t have much it would be nice to get some of the broad strokes out of the way before this important project is put off again. While I don’t see us forgetting about it like we previously did, we would both rather have it done now while we are motivated to do so and while we have a small measure of time to commit to this undertaking.

We have both seen and read a few wills in our lives but we never sat down to write one ourselves. But it is not just about us anymore, we want to make sure that our son (and any future children) are not left with a cluster when we are no longer around whether that is five or fifty years from now. It is also an opportunity to decide what will happen if we were to become ill toward the end and what needs to be done while we are still ‘alive’.

How will the minimalistic ‘estate’ be handled? Who would care for our kid(s) if it, G-d forbid, happens sooner rather than later? What happens to all of our crap? What are our last wishes? What life saving measures, if any, should be taken? Where will we be planted?

Those are just some of the basic questions that we have been asking ourselves and while we don’t have any definitive answers we are working things through and doing our best to write them down. While this attempt will be a broad one at best (we are doing this ourselves) it will be the basis for when we sit down with a lawyer in the future and pull everything together as it should be. We are going to take care of the basics now and work out many of the details over time. But, it is nice to know that something is getting recorded and that things will, for the most part, be taken care of and we generally know what will happen when that day comes.

Family Day Trip… To Delaware

My wife and I grew up in the Philadelphia area but there are many places in eastern Pennsylvania that we have yet to see. This is largely what motivated us to begin taking day trips last summer. While we have been less active this season, we are still getting out when we can and visiting places that, for one reason or another, we have not explored in previous years. Thankfully, my aunt and uncle helped us check another one of those places off our list yesterday when they treated us to a day at Winterthur.

After falling behind schedule early in the morning trying to get a few urgent items taken care of for the lodge (it is that time of year again) we made our way south and across the state line to meet them in the parking lot of the historic site. We got there a little later than expected but the timing actually worked out well as it allowed us to enjoy a nice lunch in the cafeteria before beginning the tour of the old DuPont estate. Of course, we also discussed some recent genealogy findings during the meal but that is another topic for another post (very exciting new information though).

Half past noon and we boarded the tram car at the visitor’s center to meander through the gardens, forest, and fields. While I wasn’t able to capture much of the 25 minute journey I did manage to get a few reasonable pictures across the vast fields of the gazebo….

…and a farm house in the distance.

It really is an excellent little ride and I am certain that it would be even better during the spring bloom. Maybe next time we will just spend the day walking around the grounds and enjoying the sights and smells.

The ride terminated at the massive mansion which truly is something that you have to stand beside to appreciate the immense scale. Even when looking at the main entrance it is startling to think that this once was a private residence.

Within a few minutes of arrival, we were back in the reception area waiting for the house tour to begin (actually, it is only one floor of the house that you are touring). Before piling our small group into the elevator we passed an interesting hallway that gave a little hint as to what was to follow.

While that small hallway was a hint, it really couldn’t fully provide us an insight as to the elaborate staging that was to follow as was evident in the first room that we entered after getting off the lift…

After a couple more rooms and many details, most of which I cannot recall, we turned the corner and I couldn’t help but notice the silhouette at the far end of the building…

We made our way in that direction and while we didn’t venture out into the sun room with the sculpture, we did find ourselves beside pains of wavy windows…

…and in front of a magnificent staircase.

When you look at the staging and the impact of the sweeping curve it just makes you want to ascent the stairs. As that was not a possibility, I had to at least lean over and take a picture up the center of the spiral…

At this point we were at the far end of the building and while we made a few stops and toured a few rooms on the way back, it was a few of the items in the rooms that caught my attention such as the chandeliers that hung from the ceiling and the varying designs and styles of each one.

However, every once in a while you come across items that make you stop for a moment. The kinds of things that you nearly forget that you have a camera in your hand because you are just caught in the history of the objects before you. That is the kind of feeling you get when you stand in front of George Washington’s china set from Mount Vernon.

While it seemed like it had just begun, the tour was over, we went down the escalator, and we were walking back through the main foyer with a feeling of wanting to see more. Still early in the afternoon, having seen a little bit of the inside, it was time to explore a little of the outside spaces. So we made our way past the soup terrene exhibit and up the stairs where you can get a clear view of the extensive window work currently underway.

From there we strolled down the paths past the open windows…

…the blooming trees….

…and into the open courtyard.

Just above this entertaining space was the heated pool full of fish (I couldn’t catch any with the camera so no picture of the pool this time). Just beyond the far end of the water, you could really appreciate and you could almost see the houseguests slowly making their way down the long staircase from the house to the pool.

 

We took a few minutes to sit and chat when I noticed that the camera card was full so this is where the pictures end. Front this outdoor entertainment area of the main house, we made our way across the entry courtyard (where we first entered the house) and into a smaller but still grand structure which served as the second DuPont residence when his collections overtook the main space in his home. Now the gift shop and café, we were able to enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and continue our conversation throughout the remainder of the afternoon.

By 4:30 we were heading back to the car and on the road again heading toward the state line. I honestly can’t remember the last time that I spent the day with my aunt and uncle beyond the usual family get together or being at my parent’s house. Actually, I had sadly forgotten how much I enjoy spending time with them and talking with them. I’m glad that we made the time to do this and I am happy that my wife and I were able to see Winterthur for the first time with them. I really couldn’t have asked for a better way to spend a Saturday.