Working On My Masonic Calendar

It is that time of year when the calendar seems to scream at me begging for mercy as I strap its legs to a wooden block. It is a process that repeats every fall as we emerge from the ease of summer. And while there are already enough events, projects, and other commitments on my personal and work calendars, it is the lodge calendar that seems to put things over the edge every year. This year has proven to be a particularly difficult one to balance.

Even something as basic as the stated meeting schedule is already met with at least one conflict in December. That was discovered even before I took a closer look at some of other blocks on the calendar. At this point, and this is by no means the end of events coming to the fore, there are certainly going to be some difficult decisions that have to be made moving forward.

Extra meetings shouldn’t be an issue as the schedule someone worked out preventing too many commitments from stacking up in a single week. However, the weekly fellowship will continue to take a hit as I need to limit the nights that I am out of the house while also juggling other events on the calendar… usually I don’t like to be out twice in one week more than once a month (if I can help it). But there are some other events to which I will bring my family such as Autumn Day, the Open House (if it comes together), and the Blood Drive (although there is a conflict that day in December as well).

While I would like to attend meetings at other lodges, be present for appendant body gatherings, and enjoy the fellowship at other communications, it doesn’t seem like that is going to be a possibility this year. I can’t remember a time when my calendar was so overloaded and I am hoping that proves to be an outlier rather than the new normal. Hopefully, the schedule next year will be a little lighter or, at the very least, I am better prepared for the onslaught of commitments.

For now, with so many other obligations I am also having to scale back on my time at the lodge even further this fall as I need to spend time with my family. In the end, family is what has and always will take precedence. Everything else is secondary. And this is something that every brother understands and all of them have supported me in making this decision. After all, our fraternity should make our family stronger.

A Welcomed Weekend

While we have a busy schedule this weekend we still have an opportunity to catch up on a few things. When we originally moved into our house we were able to get a pretty good handle on a few things but there have been a few places around our house that have been in need of our attention. The largest and most time consuming of which has been the organization and reorganization of our offices… they always seem to be the first things that are pushed down the list when something comes up.

Things have been so busy this summer that there hasn’t been much time on the weekends to spend as a family let alone get the things we want to get done around the house. While we don’t have the large blocks of time, I can see a few opportunities to tackle some of the disorganization that can be found around us. Now that things have been moved out of my wife’s office from the chaos of renovations last month and there is an extra bookcase in my office, there is an outside chance that we will be able to make some progress.

But even if that time evaporates and we find ourselves in the same situation come Monday morning, I am okay with that so long as we are able to spend the little free time that we have with our son. It is a new give and take that we continue to embrace, and sometimes fight, every weekend. There are moments when we wish we could have some space, have a break, just a little time to ourselves but there are also the moments when we could spend all day just watching our son in amazement occasionally looking at one another in disbelief that he is our little boy.

Just that simple fact makes me forget about all the things that need to be done. But we still need to make the time to take care of the house because when we aren’t overcome by the adorableness, we keep thinking about that list that does seem to want to go away. This weekend we hope to make those down moments a little easier and our list a little shorter. After all, like many things you just can’t put them off forever. Eventually that list needs to be taken care of so when we do have those moments to ourselves, we can enjoy the quiet and relaxation that those moments provide.

What Happened To Our Summer?

Previously I wrote about trying to figure out where my wife and I were going to take our son this summer. Many of the plans mentioned in that post have been solidified but it still only reveals one small aspect of our summer scheduling. I wish it were that simple but that is simply not the reality in which we live. There are many other factors playing into the rearranging of days, times, projects, vacations, and obligations that many of us have to juggle during this time of the year.

In addition to our desire to escape for a day or two at a time we also have many other things scribbled into the small grids that summarize our season. The next group that we have to account for are the various projects that we are having completed at the house over the next couple of months. These include the small items like garage doors, landscaping (i.e. tree removal), and interior door installation. And then there are the not so small projects that I hope to see completed like the HVAC overhaul as well as deck and porch construction. All of these take a lot of time and, right now are a bit in flux with regard to timing which is why we need to keep a few spots open.

Next are the family events that round out the calendar and that have been scheduled for months. This doesn’t just include the picnics in August but also the times when we need to schedule times to get together with family. There are so many things happening at this moment that it has become necessary to schedule these weekends. Of course, there are also a few times, granted they are few and far between, that we have scheduled to meet up with friends as well.

Day trips and local events have also become important in our schedule as we want to take the time to explore the communities around our home and also find different places for us to visit on a regular basis. Finally, there are the obligations that we have both during the week and on the weekends that we have little flexibility in scheduling. Did I mention that we need to maintain our home and property too… yeah, that requires allocation of a few weekends. So, at this point, it is surprising to find that there really isn’t a great deal of free space remaining on the calendar and the few open weekends that do exist are going to be welcomed as a respite from the chaos of the season. That is, of course, if they don’t get filled up with some unavoidable occurrence between now and then.

Busy Day Off

A day off is never simply a day off anymore. While there are occasions when I have taken some time to travel or go to different events, lately that hasn’t been the case as there are simply too many things that need to get done or appointments that need to be scheduled. Yesterday was a prime example of this new, self-created, reality as I originally took the day off to speak at an event in the afternoon and go to my son’s appointment in the early evening. Well, that isn’t exactly how things ended up working out.

Having slept in an extra thirty minutes on Sunday, I told my wife that I would take care of breakfast for our son in the morning. It is actually pretty fun spending the time with him and he is usually pretty patient with me when it takes a little longer to prepare his meal. By the time he was done eating and I had finished waking up, half of the morning was already gone and the first appointment of the day was about to begin. When I previously said that I needed to get more estimates done for the various projects around the house I wasn’t kidding.

As I discussed all the options and what exactly needed to be done with the garage door company, my wife headed out to a local event as one of the orchards in the area with our son. After my meeting was done and the quote in hand, I got in the car and drove the ten minutes down the road to meet up with them. It was actually pretty interesting watching my son walk along the long rows of strawberries eating all of the fruit out of the small basket almost as soon as my wife put it in there. When we finished picking our pile (pile and a half when accounting for all the ones our son consumed), we got back in our cars and headed home where we finished feeding out son his lunch, played a bit, and put him down for his nap.

Just as we were about to take him upstairs, the doorbell rang and the second appointment of the day began. This time we received a quote for my office doors (and a few ballpark figures for the deck and porch that we would like to add later). Like the first quote of the day, it was much lower than the initial estimates that I received. Unfortunately, that was the end of the estimates as the third appointment had to be rescheduled for next week… honestly, I don’t know if they are going to be able to beat the price I just got from this company but we will have to wait and see.

After taking a short break when I was able to check the mail, send a few emails, and waking up our son for his snack, we got back in the car and headed north to the pediatrician’s office. It was a great checkup that I will write about later and, fortunately, the waiting room wasn’t filled with Gosselins. Like many days away from the office, time seemed to evaporate from by grasp and before we had another moment to catch our breath, the day was winding down and we were planning for the follow day. All of this and I still wasn't able to fit everything into my schedule. And, at the moment, it looks like my next day out of the office will be just as busy next week.

Climbing The Desktop Mountain

It seems like the last meeting was only yesterday and as the time has continued to fly by, the projects have continued to pile high. The last couple of months have been trying in more ways than one and as the district visitation and numerous other deadlines approach, I am continuing to struggle to get things done. But sometimes this is what we have to do as the Secretary of the lodge… we have to prioritize the various wants of the lodge, complete the needs, and slowly start working down the list.

Unfortunately, there are more projects that need to get done now than at any other point during the year and so the hours of communication, processing, sorting, and filling out forms has been a bit more arduous than usual. It hasn’t helped that I have also been absent from the lodge for many of the meetings and other gatherings as well but, again, that is part of the personal prioritization that we must all find for ourselves. But it has been tough trying to balance everything.

It has not just been the many new things that have come up since the beginning of the year. There have also been a number of items that have carried over from 2015 and, undoubtedly, many things from the previous year that have had a significant impact on our ability to check things off the list over the past few months. And for each of those items it has been a constant stream of emails, phone calls, and conversations at the lodge. Those are the moments when I would like to have an answer for the brothers asking the questions but I have nothing to offer or very little to report. Some things, whether I like it or not, are simply out of my hands.

However, there are a few things that seem to be coming together albeit a little later in the year than we had planned. I can see the peak of the pile and soon hope to be gliding down the slope into the summer. Of course, that will also be the time when all the projects that have been moved to the bottom of the list should be competed so that maybe, just maybe, we can head into the fall and the final four stated meetings of the year with a clean slate… at least of the myriad of things on my desk. But, right now, I just have to make it through the next few months.

Darting To The Lodge

That is not my car... but it is for now.

Given the conditions of the roads and still feeling stiff and sore from the accident, I hesitated heading over to the lodge last night. However, there were a multitude of meetings that I needed to take care of this week and driving to Ardmore was the most efficient means of getting everything done. So, while not the most comfortable option, I slowly navigated the bright white Dodge Dart rental around the suburban pothole minefield and made it to the lodge in plenty of time to check the mail and settle in before the next brother walked through the door.

As it turned out, I was not the only one having a bit of an off week as there were a couple of meetings that had to be postponed due to personal reasons. However, even with a few brothers having to miss the fellowship night, the lodge was still busy with nearly a dozen scattered throughout the building. Some of us were discussing various topics in the hall while others were practicing for the upcoming degree work. And, of course, we also had our new candidates in attendance nearing what they need to know before taking the next step.

Much of my night, without the aforementioned meetings, was regarding matters unrelated to the lodge. The first conversation I had was with a brother who will be helping me with some of the home renovation projects that I mentioned in a previous post. We also discussed my recent accident and reviewed some of the lessons that we each have learned over the years through personal experience as well as the accounts told by others. With books in hand it was also an opportunity to share with my brothers the work that has finally come to fruition in recent months (more about those later).

Finally, toward the end of the night, my cousin arrived to both take care of some replacement SAR paperwork and also to catch up a bit. It is great to have this common bond with him and have a space where we can meet and talk about our lodges, work, family, and anything else that may come to mind. It is also a great opportunity to introduce him to some of the brothers from the lodge in case he ever wanted to join us for a meeting. While not all of the meeting I had planned for took place, it was still a productive night and while I didn’t get home until much later than expected, at least I could relax knowing that a few things were crossed off my list for the week.

Six Months Later… Taxes

We were a little busy earlier in the year and while it has been a long time coming and many hours sitting at my desk, our taxes are finally done! It should be no surprise that after having printed out all our statements and highlighting our expenses I ended up with a packed well over a hundred pages thick. Not the biggest and not the smallest pile that we have handed off to our accountant. Of course, unlike last year, I did pull aside most of the 2015 documents needed for April… maybe next year we can simply file our taxes rather than an extension.

However, while I am hopeful for a small refund (even with this administration), it is little relief considering the bill that we will have to pay for having our taxes prepared. It is a flat rate but a rather steep one and it will take a pretty hefty sum to balance out that particular expenditure. By the time all is said and done, like every other year, I really have to take a closer look at the proposals for a simplified tax code rather than the hieroglyphics currently in use.

I believe this is a great time to start reaching out to the brethren and finding someone with whom I can trust our financial information. The place that we currently use definitely served its purpose for a while but the friend of the family that once handled our returns has long since retired and we have been passed around annually since then. They are strictly a service firm at this point rather than a place where there is a personal connection… time to move on.

It really is amazing when you think back on how long it takes to pull everything together especially when it is done in one shot rather than slowly over the course of the year. Well, it is a long process for me as I prefer to itemize all of our expenses especially the outrageous amount of medical expenses for which we are now responsible… thanks Obamacare! We could just file a simple return but why simply surrender part the money we earned over the past year? After all, the government didn’t temp for me during the year to take the day off so why should I pay them more?

In the end, the most important thing for us, especially now, is that this can now be marked as complete and we can devote our focus on many more important things in our life… especially the little stinky one. It is just annoying when tasks such as this occupy so much of my time, time that can be better spent elsewhere. Hopefully this is something I can avoid next year now that I have all the supporting documents up to date and an office is some kind of order even though it may not fit the definition of being organized.   

It Is (Past) That Time Again

When I first started working at my current company it was outlined that I would have an annual review to go over my performance during the previous year. Of course, the only exception to that policy was the first six months as I agreed upon being hired that I needed some time to get re-acclimated following an extended absence from the industry. This placed my first review in the middle of April 2014. Obviously, this would mean that my second review would occur around the same time the following year. Well, that obviously didn’t happen or you would have read this post months ago.

However, while it would have been nice to have everything move along as planned, we have been busy this year with both new and existing business. A great problem to have and something that I attribute to us all doing our jobs and doing them well. So, months later, we were finally able to find a window in the day to get my review done last week. Thankfully, my company believes in retro pay!

It is still an odd process for me as each of my colleagues completes and evaluation form rating me on a scale of 1-5 (1 being the best) and providing comments on various categories related to the my performance. I have filled this same form out for a few of my colleagues and it can be a bit of a challenge at times especially given the fact that we have to recommend three areas of improvement. While it was difficult to determine these things in others, it was rather easy when completing my own form. Yes, I was also required to take a step back and review my own performance.

By being honest with my own review, the others sounded fantastic as I sat across the desk from the owner of the company. Heck, I would much rather be too harsh on myself and use it as motivation than think I am doing a great job only to struggle with my responsibilities. Seems that my boss feels the same way which made for a great experience going over the previous year and the flattering comments that my colleagues wrote as well as the points where I need improvement. Both were very much appreciated. The salary increase at the end of the meeting was appreciated as well!

It continues to be an interesting process but one that is hugely beneficial in monitoring my performance. I know what to keep doing and where I need to improve my routines. Hopefully I can show the marked improvement that I expect by the time my next review comes around which is still scheduled for April! Of course, you will find out shortly afterward in a few months. 

Last Time, First Time

I headed into this weekend knowing that it was going to be a long one. Earlier in the week I had to make the decision regarding where I would be going and what I would be able to get done. In the end, there were a couple of things that required my attention and so my long Saturday began with me staggering out of bed around 6:30.

The first stop of the morning was at the lodge where I had to ensure that the Red Cross had enough time to set up for the Blood Drive which was scheduled to begin at 10. For those of you unfamiliar with the logistics, they usually begin unloading the truck between 8 and 830 in the morning. Thankfully the traffic was light so my slightly late departure had me arrive just as the truck was pulling up alongside the building.

I stayed at the lodge through most of the set up and left for my second commitment about an hour before donors were supposed to begin showing up. It was time to backtrack a bit and take care of some final things at my mother-in-law’s house. My wife and I arrived at about the same time and double checked what had to be moved out. Once my brother-in-law pulled up, the moving went quickly (the 4 larger items were much lighter than expected) and we were soon headed back to our house to unload everything.

Fortunately, the only items that my wife decided to take from the house are ones that have a practical use and that we were going to pick up at some point in the future anyway. Because of this, we had plenty of room and knew exactly where everything had to go. After offering a little compensation to my brother-in-law for his help, my wife and I took a few minutes to relax and plan the rest of the afternoon.

My wife and I agreed that she would join me in Ardmore giving me a bit of a head start so that he could take care of our son before leaving and so they didn’t have to spend too much time at the event. With our plans in place, I got back in the car and headed off to the lodge for the remainder of the blood drive. After a quick retrieval of the mail, I walked back through the doors and checked on the donor progress… the turnout wasn’t bad for a last minute arrangement and it soon got a little better as a brother walked into the hall and signed up.

While we were catching up on things, my wife arrived and seeing others laying on the tables decided, for the first time, to donate. Of course we had to double check first but given that she was well beyond the 6 week waiting period, she walked up and registered to donate. As it turns out, she was perfectly fine and somewhat surprised at how easy the whole process was from beginning to end.

So it was an interesting and busy day that came to an end with the lodge once again having been cleared out and my wife and I enjoying the weather by taking our son for a walk along Lancaster Avenue. And after a quick dinner with my parents at a local restaurant, we headed back home a little tired but having gotten a fair amount accomplished during the day. We all slept quite well last night and looked forward to a mostly open schedule for the rest of the weekend

Memories To Carry Me Through Monday

Cute Monkey!

It was a long weekend and I really wasn’t looking forward to heading into the office this morning. For the last three days we were out at one place or another trying to get things done and complete some final tasks. It would have been tiring had everything gone to plan but ended up being exhausting. There were highs and lows with our son doing his best to go along with everything. While he was a bit fussy and overwhelmed, we couldn’t have expected him to handle things much better than he did. With that said, we really don’t want to put him through another weekend like we just had.

When I got up this morning it felt like I hadn’t slept in days. While my eyes may have been closed and my body immobile, there seemed to have been little recuperation. My body was certainly sore and my head ached. And even though my gassy son was drowning out my alarm clock, it was still a sound that was more welcoming than the chirp and screech emanating from my cell phone.

Even half cognizant of all that was going on around me, I still had those few moments from the past few days that carry me through the morning hours. Seeing my son being held by his cousins is something that has been a bit overdue but happened at just the right time. While they didn’t seem quite sure what to do when my wife placed him in their arms, their faces lit up and seared their reaction in my memory.

Last night also proved to be a great ending to the long (but too short) weekend as my son insisted on cooing at me as the paint peeling smell emanated from his diaper. It was the first time that we heard him make those sounds and they made me want to call out of work this morning just so I could hear them again. Obviously, I will have to make do with the memory which carried me through my commute this morning.

While on that drive my wife called me not long after I got on the highway. I was anticipating less than good news, when I picked up the phone I could hear the understated excitement in her voice. Our son wasn’t just cooing, he was laughing. Even though I wasn’t there to hear it for the first time I am glad that my wife was able to have that ‘first experience’ and now I have something to look forward to, something to carry me through the long Monday.

The More You Know!

Where’s The Mail?

This year it seems like every lodge meeting is sneaking up on me. As I have documented in this blog, I used to have the routine of heading over to the lodge every Tuesday to check in and make sure that everything was taken care of. This was especially true the Tuesday before a stated meeting. No surprise, my schedule has changed and I now find myself trying to get the same amount of work done in about half the time (if I am lucky).

Last night I was finally able to make it back to Ardmore to catch up with the dedicated brothers in attendance and also to check the mail. Well, that was the plan. I was able to speak with many of the brothers in attendance but the mail was a different situation. As it had been some time since I last cleaned out the box, the post office decided to hold much of the mail behind the counter in a bin. This may not be a concern for some but that is simply not the case.

The only times that I have been able to get back to the main line have been in the evenings and occasionally on the weekends when we have something scheduled beyond a simple trip to the post office. Basically, the times that I am in the area I am either busy doing something else or it is long after the post office has closed. I guess there is going to have to be a special trip or detour to Ardmore in the very near future.

However, as is always the case, the best part of the night is seeing that the lodge is still active. We have had some bumps along the way this year at the lodge but it is great to see that everything and everyone is still moving in the right direction. The new brothers have really taken ownership of their masonic education and I continue to look forward to seeing them participate more and more as time goes on. Who knows, maybe there is a new secretary among them for when I am ready to hand things off (years down the road).

Things remain busy at lodge, work, and at home. While hectic at times (most of the time actually) I don’t think I would change a thing. Well, maybe longer hours at the post office but that is about it. Maybe, just maybe, things will calm down a bit over the next few months but I wouldn’t be surprised if the opposite were true. Regardless of what happens to the schedule, things will continue moving forward and that is really all that any of us can do.

Returning Home

This morning I woke up to the reassuring thought that tonight I would be home sleeping next to my wife and son. However, there was a long day ahead of me and a conference call that was about to start moments after I stumbled out of bed. During this postponed weekly call I couldn’t simply let the productive few morning moments pass me by so I used the time confined to my room to take care of a last blast of emails and packed my bag. With a few minutes to go I had everything ready and as soon as I hung up the phone I was out the door.

After returning the key cards to the front desk, I made my way across the street and walked through the Hilton on my way to the show shuttle. Before inspecting the line I swung through the gift shop in search of an item required for my return to the office tomorrow… a Chicago refrigerator magnet. It may seem odd but it had become tradition that each time we travel to a new place for work we pick up a magnet for the office fridge. We have put together quite the collection from across the country.

With the line for the shuttle painfully long which would have prevented me from making to the booth on time, I made the detour to the front of the building, hailed a cab, and was at the convention center with a little breathing room. Enough time to check my coat and bags and make my way to the booth before the first scheduled meeting of the day. I guess it is a good thing that I was busy this morning because it left me little time to think about getting back home to my family.

The morning flew by with a number of excellent conversations and introductions including an interesting discussion with a fellow brother that happened to be passing the booth. Immediately after lunch it was time to leave the floor and so I made my way, along with the CEO and his wife, back to the coat check and out to the sidewalk to catch the final cab of the trip. Thankfully the show was a success and the hard work that everyone put in paid off so the conversations during the 40 minute drive was of a great experience and looking forward to the show next year in Atlanta.

Everything went as smoothly as possible at the airport (unlike my departure on Sunday) and I found myself with a little extra time before the flight. With nothing else that needed to be done I found a little restaurant where I could sit down for a late lunch and called the office to give a little update and my wife to tell her how much I looked forward to getting back home. Before I knew it I was on the plane, propped up against the window, and fast asleep with my legs crumpled against my briefcase.

The flight landed on time with me waking up just before the wheels touched the ground. After a bit of a wait outside the baggage claim (for some reason we pulled into the international terminal) I was soon nested next to my son as my wife drove us away from the cluster of a pickup area. It was a great feeling to be home and finally reunited with my family. While I may have woken up in Chicago, I will be going to bed with my wife and son tonight. A perfect end to a business trip.

A Long Day Away From Baby

Given how things played out last year, I expected things to be busy today at the trade show. What I didn’t expect was sheer volume of people that would be attending the show. What had taken me 20 minutes to go from getting on the bus to the booth, was now an hour voyage through the sea of attendees and exhibitors. Thankfully, I had left early enough that I still made it to the booth with plenty of time to spare before the first appointment that I had booked for the day.

As the day flew by you could tell who had been at the show for both days walking up and down the aisles. Sore feet and slow moving legs were apparent. And, of course, there was the larger than life crowd… the ones that made me look like the after picture from a weight loss commercial. It was a constant fluffy wave that made you think twice when you took a lunch break or went over to the cart to get a cup of coffee.

While our booth was busy throughout the day with only a handful of moments when we were left to ourselves, there were other companies when the exact opposite was true. It was rather odd to see the lack of interest that they were inciting especially in a room where there were more than a few niche companies and products that were constantly talking to customers all day. Makes me glad that some of our previous discussions never panned out but also make me wonder how we could have made the show different for them.

Even during the numerous humorous and busy moments, I couldn’t help but think about what I might be missing back home. I kept thinking about my wife and son and hoping that he wasn’t missing me too much. While he may not be aware of everything he does know when I am out late and I am certain that he knew I was gone.

Those times were tough but it was also nice getting those pictures and videos from my wife and sharing them with those around me. While I may not have been able to talk to him, I could at least talk about him. That was my way of getting through the times when I missed him most and the best way that I was able to relate to those around me who all had kids. That is how I got through today!

Where Did February Go?

I knew heading into the month that this was going to be a bit of a challenge both at work and at home. The shortened calendar provides a bit of a crunch with regard to billing and just making sure everything is accomplished within the confines of the calendar. Two days may not seem like a lot but that is about 2 hours of billable time per person that are lost. Thankfully, that all seemed to work out and I was still able to put in my usual 200 hours. Of course this also shortened my lodge timeline a bit and I am still trying to make up for time lost.

However, work and lodge are far down the list of things that colored the calendar. My wife and I began the month as a family of two and now we find ourselves bringing the last day to a close with a son nearly two weeks old. It was a month that also saw a tremendous loss to our family… thankfully it is a short month and the page on the calendar can be quickly turned. Two days makes a hug difference in this regard.

The month began interestingly enough with all the football fanatics going into warm weather hibernation, Phil declaring that we were screwed for at least six more weeks, and Brian Williams announcing that he was not a highlander and has not shaped the course of history since the big bang. That same week I witnessed quite the interesting lodge meeting followed by the raising of another brother the following week. It was a unique experience going from seeing boys transformed into men through scouting and a man transformed into a mason a few days after.

Things were also busy at the office as we waited for Rip Torn to tell us what was going to happen next. This compounded the whole billing situation mentioned above. Things were just beginning to calm a little when my wife and I reached the fateful weekend that brought us to Bryn Mawr Hospital two days in a row. Of course, since the arrival of our son my perspective has changed just a wee bit. All the chaos from the first half of February just seemed to go away, the subsequent scramble to catch up doesn’t seem to bother me like it used to, and the rest of the days in the month just evaporated leaving only the memories behind. I know it happened but at this point I really don’t know what happened to February.

Busy Seems To Be An Understatement

Yep. The clock pretty much looks like that right now.

Every day I try to take a few minutes either at the office or at home to just breathe. This is especially true during the weekend when I really don’t want to think about all that needs to be done both around the house and at the office. Of course, the housework can’t be pushed back especially with so little time left. However, lately the same has been true with work as more and more projects and tasks have piled on top of the regular schedule.

Those few moments during my week have been absent as of late with every moment accounted for during the waking hours (and some while I am trying to sleep). Just as one thing begins to fade into the background two or three more come raging to the forefront leaving both my wife and I trying to scramble to just get through the day. This is one of the big reasons why I hate it when people change their schedules or let us know of commitments at the last minute. With all that we are dealing with right now, we need all the support that we can get and sometimes it is lacking.

While we see many of our friends and family taking time to travel, eat out, and sometimes simply relax our days, especially weekends, have been filled with places that we have to be and last minute dinner decisions. On Saturday we finally found the time to sit down and have a dinner out… while Five Guys is not the fanciest place, it was quick and allowed us to get back home and take care of a few more things. There is no time left in the day for anything nicer or travelling much further.

It seems like each night we discover something else that we need to add to our list. Sometimes it is a simple phone call while other times we have to get in the car and either run a few errands, drop things off, or quickly pick up something that we had previously overlooked. Other trips are more regular lately and cannot be put off as we need to visit with family and keep our regular doctor appointments both of which are becoming much more frequent.   

Time being the commodity that it is, this is the poorest that we have ever been. But we have gotten through these things before. While not nearly as difficult as the current situation, we have the strength both in ourselves and our marriage to make it through the days, weeks, and months. While there is no question that we will not be the same after these trials, we will be stronger, healthier, and have a greater appreciation for the life we have and all the memories that can never be taken away.

Banking, Internet, And A Couch

For a day that was only supposed to consist of a half day of working from home. This Friday had been on the calendar for months but, like many days, my schedule didn’t hold. While I did get the required amount of billable time in for the office over the course of the holiday week, there were other things that came up and consumed blocks of time during the day.

So I woke up early in the morning and instead of opening my computer and taking care of some writing for work, I got in the car and headed to the bank. Even this simple commute had its moments of frustration as my E-Z Pass was being difficult and required that I stop and discuss the matter with a toll collector. I got to the bank before any other brother rounded the corner to park their car.

I was hoping that this was going to be a quick stop but we are dealing with a bank here so I wasn’t able to get back on the road for over an hour. However, during that time I was able to talk to one of my brothers who was kind enough to agree to help me pick up a couch from Ollie’s that I had purchased a couple weeks prior during a heck of a sale. So back on the road, the back roads actually given my issues with E-Z Pass, and into the townhouse where my wife and I waited for Verizon to knock on the door.

While it was unpleasant at time, it was also kind of nice being untethered from the internet for the past week but it is a necessity and we were quite happy to see the truck pull into the parking lot (especially my wife). The technician wasted no time updating the box outside and within an hour we were configuring the internet and updating the Wi-Fi on our numerous devices. Two hours after that and the cable was up and running as well. These things never get done in the 1-2 hours that they say it will take.

At this point it was time for a quick dinner, picking up a few more things for the house, and finishing up my work for the long day. It was originally going to be a nice relaxing half day but I should know better than to expect those to come to fruition anymore. But things got done and our house is becoming more like a home with every small item checked off the to-do list.

Donuts, Presents, and Dinner

Following my morning visit and photo session with my son, it was a rush to get to the office for a day full of internal meetings and conference calls. My calendar is full of such calls and meetings for the next week and a half due to the usual end of the year chaos and also the additional logistics required by account transitions. While I usually head into these meetings a little sluggish, the morning memories carried through and brought a different light to my day.

However, I had to make a quick stop along the way to pick up a “holiday treat” for the office so off to Wegmans for a box of donuts. With the detour behind me I got back on the road and made it to work just in time for my first meeting. Of course, now I had another errand that needed to get done but with little time to do it… I still had to pick up a “Secret Santa” gift which I needed to have in hand by the end of the day.

A few meetings into the day and I now found myself in the middle of the afternoon without a gift in hand and still a few other errands that needed to be taken care of since I was not going to get back to the apartment until late that evening. And then I thought of a gift that was both thoughtful and something that I could take care of in a few minutes. So I made the long trek to the internet and found exactly what I was looking for… a digital gift card to BedandBreakfast.com.

One item off the list and a couple more to go so I did something that I really hate to do during the week… I stepped out of the office. I was only going a few blocks away to the bank and Home Depot but it is still not something I enjoy as there are a bunch of other things that need to be taken care of at my desk. Thirty minutes later with a new debit card and a back seat full of packing boxes, I got back to the office with enough time to knock out a few items before my next marathon meeting.

By the time that we all walked out of the conference room nearly everything was checked off my list for the day with a few things added for Monday morning (I had to take Friday off). It seemed as though we were all relatively in sync as late in the afternoon, we all gathered around a table and signed our names to the holiday cards that would be going out the following week. 400 scribble signatures later and it was nearly time to head to dinner.

We all met down the road at Bar Louie for a company dinner and party. With drinks in hand and appetizers on the way, we all took turns revealing the name we pulled from the box and exchanging gifts. As it turns out the person whom I had gotten a gift also pulled my name and we both purchased perfect gifts for one another. She was excited to have an excuse to get away and I was happy to have a Phillies outfit for my son!

Everyone was happy with what they received and we all had a good time chatting and relaxing around the dinner table not thinking or talking about work. It was a great night that seemed to fly by and a good way to bookend a day that began with me being able to see my son again. However, this was just the beginning of a long night and a tiring weekend…

Three Years Later…

In addition to everything else that has been going on in our life recently, we have also been looking here and there for a new place to live. This really isn’t a surprise given the issues that we have had with our current residence especially over the past year. Well, we have finally found a place and we are busy packing the apartment. Between the other things that are on our schedule this month, we will be packing and moving everything about 45 minutes away in Chester Springs.

The new place will significantly shorten my wife’s commute to work while it will cut about 5 minutes \off of my drive despite being a few more miles each way. However, the biggest change will be the drastic increase in the amount of living space. The apartment that we have spent the last three years in has approximately 700 square feet while our new dwelling is 1400 square feet plus a finished basement. And, better yet, we will go from one bathroom to two and a half (those of you who are married understand the importance of this upgrade).

However, at the moment we are carrying two leases. We are attempting to ‘play nice’ in our request to terminate the lease for our apartment and hopefully that will come through. Although I am planning for the usual cluster that has become increasingly commonplace during our time living in the building. I guess we will have to wait and see if they want to play nice as well.

In the meantime, we are not going to let that stop us from moving forward (westward actually). There is a fresh coat of paint, new carpet, and a few other upgrades in the new place that we are looking forward to and I will have my own office and workbench area in the basement. The move has already begin with a few dozen boxes stacked in the corner and even more boxes packed and piled in the apartment. Once we have some more time, we will get a few movers and finish the job.

So, with the year coming to an end there is another change happening. We would have liked to have done this sooner but some things you can’t really plan for and you have to just let them happen. It’s not an easy time to move but nothing that we can’t make happen. And while no one enjoys the process of moving, we are looking forward to settling in to a new space and starting the next stage of our life.

A Long Baby Appointment

Here is your obligatory baby photo for this post (old picture from 20 weeks).

For the past several months we have been seeing the doctor every four weeks to check in and make sure our son is on schedule. Last night was the last appointment in that particular schedule as we will now be heading to the doctor every two or three weeks until our son’s birthday. Thankfully, everything has checked out so far and he is developing close to what the doctor expects (he is actually a week ahead of schedule at this point).

However, while the baby is progressing as planned, the doctor was running late last night… very late. We both made our way to the office a little quicker than expected and checked in at the front desk about twenty five minutes early. Once a couple of seats opened up in the waiting room we settled in for the duration as given the mass of people in the office we knew there was no way that they would be running on time. Our appointment time came and went with little expectation as to when we would be seen.

Jeopardy kept us occupied for a little while but our patience began slowly degrading as Wheel of Fortune gradually killed our brain cells. By the time that show ended there were still a few of us fidgeting in the waiting room and what little patience was left quickly vanished once Dancing With The Stars came on. Honestly, I don’t know how people can watch that show. Fortunately, it wasn’t long after the dancing started when we heard my wife’s name being called and we moved as fast as we could to the examining room.

This change in scenery was met with more waiting as we could hear the doctor and nurses scurrying up and down the hallways like mice trying to escape from a trash can. This was accompanied by the sounds of heartbeats from the adjacent rooms. It was nearly 8:30 when the doctor finally opened the door, listened to the heart rate, took the usual measurements, and answered the couple of questions that we had for her. We discussed the net appointment and were on our way out having waited over two hours for a ten minute appointment.

It was a long night that followed a long day but it was well worth the wait as we were able to once again hear our son and watch him as he kicked wondering why he was being poked and prodded. Like many nights, that is what grounds us. But we also learned the important lesson to never again make a doctor appointment the week of Thanksgiving… I think even the baby was not happy about having to sit in the waiting room so long.

Space, The Current Frontier…

Over the past month my wife and I have continued to stay busy with the growing list of things that we need to get done before the baby arrives and other things that need to be taken care of in the family. Lately there has seldom been a day that we could find the time just to breath and pull back from all of the chaos that is currently surrounding us. Of course, there have been other things and people that have continued to pull us into various situations which was not helping things either.

There comes a point, which we came to last week, when you simply have to pull back and look at the larger picture. We would like to do anything and everything that we can, help in any way we are able, and generally just check things off of our lists of task that we need to get done. However, some of those things are hurting everyone more than they are helping anyone. This past week we came to that conclusion, pulled back from certain things, and refocused on the positive changes in our lives.

The space that we gained, the calmness achieved, and the focus we now have is something that has been missing over the past month. We are finally able to breathe and recover from all that is happening around us. Don’t get me wrong, we cannot fully disengage from those people and situations around us but we can’t let them run our lives either.

We have grown to appreciate the need for space. Both from situations and people but also in the physical area around us. Life had become incredibly cramped and it was time to reset the boundaries, reorganize, and embrace the space that we have in our life. This is necessary not just to protect ourselves but our baby as well. Frankly, we don’t want our child to feel as though they are imprisoned but the situations and people around them.

The freedom that this decision has afforded us finally allowed us to have a weekend that feels as though it is more than a couple hours long. The days seemed to have slowed down and the tenseness has been removed from the simplest of things like driving, texting, and calling. While not a perfect plan by any means and something that we don’t expect to last, it is the best option that we have in front of us and, so far, making that space is just what we needed.