Valentine’s Day Flu

After a long week for both me and my wife when sleep seemed more like an option rather than a requirement, we headed out to dinner at the local Cheesecake Factory on Friday night. Seemed appropriate since we were coming from her mom’s house and this was the place where the three of us would commonly meet. After the experience we had (it takes talent to mess up a plain well done cheeseburger three times in a single night) it is safe to say that we will not be returning.

The rest of the night was about as uneventful as we could expect. Not easy as we are heading into the last couple of weeks of the pregnancy which has a certain effect on her demeanor which is compounded by the other emotional events that are swirling around our daily life. But it was the weekend and while we didn’t have any particular plans, trips, or even gifts, we were till going to do our best to enjoy a final Valentine’s Day before the baby arrives.

We had our weekend planned out to both take a few moments for ourselves but also to spend some much needed time with family. When we got up on Saturday morning those plans quickly changed as my wife could feel the very beginnings of a fever beginning to surface. All the plans that we had were immediately thrown away and we focused on doing our best to relax and spending a day at home.

By the early afternoon my wife wasn’t feeling any better so we gave the doctor a call to determine what our next course of action should be. Given the fact that she is 38 weeks pregnant it really wasn’t a surprise when they told us to head to the emergency room and get checked out. Hours, numerous tests, and a few naps later and we were finally told that the flu shot that sent her to the same emergency room in October didn’t work.

Once we were able to jump through all the hoops we were finally able to head out the door just as the snow was beginning to pick up. Of course, since it was now nearly eight at night there was only one pharmacy near our house which was open and able to fill the scripts. Four pharmacies and a quick Chinese food take out later and we finally made it home around nine. Everything seemed to settle down and we were both looking forward to sleeping in. That was the thought until my wife began waking me up in the middle of the night saying that her temperature wasn’t going down. It was going to be a long night but at least I didn't get stuck on the Pennsylvania Turnpike for eight hours like I did last year. 

McDonald’s Or Wendy’s?

Those of you that know me, know that is not a question that I encounter in my daily life. Those of you that have yet to get to know me you know by my svelte build that is not a common query. But that question really isn’t the story, it is what was going on around me when that question was asked which is of interest. The fact that the question was even asked by a complete stranger adds a little color to my long Friday commute.

I started my morning right on time to make it to the office well before a 9:00 am call. Having had to work from home the day before, the day was going to be pretty hectic as I tried to make up for what was a less than optimal day of production. The roads weren’t too bad with only a few slightly slick spots here and there, the occasional rumble strip of snow and ice, and a sun glare that gradually got worse as the minutes went by. With the sun directly in my eyes about five miles from the office I increased the gap between me and the car in front of me and reduced my speed to about 40 miles per hour. And I am really glad I did.

 

Without any warning traffic came to a dead stop and I slammed on the brakes. As the antilock brakes pumped I could hear the crunching of cars ahead of me. Thankfully, I took the precautions I did and I safely came to rest about three feet from the car in front of me (the car behind me did the same). So we all sat there for the next five minutes with our cars still running and brake lights on.

It was only a few minutes later when the reports began filling the radio and we all knew that we were going to be there for a while. Like dominos, cars were put into park, engines were turned off, and we all settled down for a long delay. Thirty minutes to go before my call and I knew that I would be dialing in from the car so I sent a few text messages to the office, my family, and my wife letting them know that I was fine but that I wasn’t going to get to the office any time soon.

 

Before I knew it, it was time to dial into the conference call. Surprisingly enough, this may have been the first time that I have had to be on a conference call from the car. Having now done it once, I can say that I am not a big fan and I will continue doing my best to avoid it in the future. By the time I got off the phone we were all sitting in the same spot and we all knew the extent of the backup as opposing traffic had now ceased and emergency vehicles were driving back and forth assessing the damage and looking for anyone else who might need assistance.

 

By 11:00 am we were all walking around the highway chatting and getting to know other people who are now sharing a common inconvenient experience. After all, we all knew how much worse it could have been for us. We could have easily been the ones in the 100 car pileup just a half mile ahead. So, while we were all a bit grumpy (especially those of us who were without coffee) we were all, at least most of us, were just trying to make the best out of things.

Not long after that, the kindness of strangers began showing itself. What began with bottles of water being handed which was appreciated, soon gave way to a woman in the far right lane passing out cupcakes which would no longer be consumed at work and the aroma of coffee being replenished in travel mugs. Our new found calm only made the morning pass a bit faster and made us all just a little bit friendlier.

Around noon we all seemed to return to our cars. Not because of any anticipation of traffic beginning to free up it was a strange unified time when everyone decided to make phone calls. I guess another benefit to this whole dilemma besides forcing everyone to just stop and try and find the positive to the situation was the fact that we could catch up on some long overdue phone calls. While I wasn’t able to dial everyone, I did manage to catch up with a few people with whom I had not spoken to in some time.

It was during these phone calls when a man came walking down the highway, stopping at every car, and asking us if we wanted a cheeseburger. Not many of us passed up the kind offer which led to his next question, “Wendy’s or McDonald’s?” Not much difference between the two so I arbitrarily chose Wendy’s. 1:00 pm and lunch was served.

The next hour when quickly and before I knew it I was on another conference call. As we discussed the difficulties of my commute I could hear the wave of car engines turning on roll up the highway (the only exceptions beyond the accident scenes being those who ran out of gas or had dead batteries). As we slowly formed a single file line and slalomed back and forth across the lanes between accident scenes, I pointed my phone from atop the steering wheel and captured some random pictures of what had caused the delay which had all of us parked on the highway for the past 6 hours.

Around 2:30 pm, I arrived at the office and, contrary to what many people would think, I wasn’t really in a bad mood. Of course, my day was wasted and I have to make up some work this weekend but I was still in one piece and I was able to witness, first hand, how people come together when put in a situation that they really can’t change. However, I am now painfully aware that I need to stop by the store sometime soon and pick up some MRE’s to make these situations a bit easier. Might be worth adding a few other preps. You never know.

Sometimes Keeping Kosher Does Much More Than Divide A Kitchen

Over the years my wife and I have observed the laws of Kashrut to varying degrees. It began about three years ago when we began eliminating pork and non kosher fish from our diet. I had eliminated shellfish long before that time due to my wife’s severe allergy but we took it a step further by removing eel, calamari, and others from our options.

Next was the big step of not mixing meat and dairy. This was particularly hard as we both grew up and thoroughly enjoyed cheeseburgers and cheese steaks. While it was a struggle, we managed to do it. However, I think we are still on some Philadelphia citizens watch list.

After our short time in Israel, our observance increased to the point at which we created a kosher kitchen in our new apartment and stocked it with strictly kosher food. As many of you know, this is not an easy endeavor as this required us to segregate our pantry, fridge, stove, cabinets, and sink and maintain a process of keeping everything kosher and having a set of steps to follow for the times when we messed up (grabbing the wrong utensil for example).

This is where we have been for the past year or so.

Lately we have been asking ourselves if this extra step has really added anything to our observance. Is it bringing us closer to G-d or is it hindering us from truly appreciating what G-d has given us? Of course, this is really part of a much broader question regarding our observance but it applies to all aspects including the laws of Kashrut.

In the end, we have decided to go back to basics as we have found ourselves getting too caught up in the details of what we are doing rather than the appreciating of what we have and what G-d has given us. While a minor aspect of the decision it is still an important one is the fact that, given our financial position, it has been detrimental to our life and well being to spend the extra money on strictly kosher products (ones that are labeled with a hechsher).

We had gotten away from appreciating life and all that we have been given. We had overcomplicated our lives and muddled the meaning of what it is to live and what it means to have G-d in our lives. It is time to keep it simple.

If I have pissed you off or offended you in some way with this post please know that you are not the first and you won’t be the last… you are the newest member of a club that has experienced tremendous growth over the past few years. However, keep in mind that all members joined the club of their own volition as they refused to be open to an opinion that differed from their own. I always welcome a respectful discussion no matter how wrong you may be.

With that said… if you agree, leave a comment; if you disagree, leave a comment; if you’re struggling with the same issue, welcome to the club, now leave a comment.